What are the preliminary steps to take before separating from your spouse?
545601
seeing a atty to find out what the laws of your state are.
58540
Basically, any property that either spouse owns prior to the marriage becomes marital property upon marriage—-regardless of whose name in on the title.  The divorce court will equally divide all marital property before issuing a divorce order.  \n\nGenerally, the way to exclude a house from marital property is with a prenuptial agreement where the spouses specifically agree to exclude certain property from marital property.  Or if a spouse is able to prove that the property was completely separate from the marital home and no marital funds were used to maintain this separate property (this includes mortgage payments, taxes, utilities bills, maintenance).  Basically, even if Husband lived in the house and never paid any bills, he is-—generally-—entitled to half the equity of that house.\n\nThis is a very basic rule which may not be true in your state.  (But most likely this is the law in your state because you are looking for one exceptional case, instead of many cases).  So, I advise you to talk to a family lawyer licensed in your state.   You and your lawyer can devise an exit strategy.  You may have other bargaining chips, such as his retirement or pension, to negotiate for what you want.  Just because he wants half of your house, does not necessarily mean he will get it.  \n\nIf you really want to find that Morris Marsden case, try www.lexisone.com, www.findlaw.com, or www.lawguru.com .  Also visit your state-court’s website; some courts publish and archive their opinions on their website.\n\n\nGood luck.\n\nSharmil McKee, Esq.\nPhiladelphia, Pa\nhttp://www.mckeelegal.com
548249
Separation isn't really the end. It doesn't mean a divorce is headed your way. Separation is actually what saved my marriage. The time away from each other is what we needed, and made us realize that we didn't want the divorce. We're happier now than we were before. Separation is a time to see if a divorce would be right for you. If it isn't, talk it out with your husband, see where he stands on it all, and take it from there. One thing married couples need to understand is that no all marriages are perfect, you'll have your ups and downs but when it comes down to it, you still love each other. My husband and I have the most dysfunctional marriage I've ever seen, but it just works for us, and we really are happy.
201876
You cant and you shouldnt have done that in the first place. Thats called adultry and your wife can devorce you for everything that your worth for that. So break it off now with her.
193340
Here is what I did.\n\nI stopped dwelling on his faults and took a good, honest look at my own. \n\nWhen I began to concentrate on how I could be a good wife regardless of his behavior, that entitled me to place HIS behavior in God's hands.\n\nWhoa. You should have seen how the Heavenly Father worked with him!\n\n1. Ask God to show you your faults.\n2. Ask Him to forgive you for them.\n3. Choose to change.\n4. Sit back and watch what happens.\n\nLike you, I really wanted my marriage to survive for many different reasons. It's obvious you have a wonderful heart for wanting to do the right thing, or you wouldn't even be asking this question.\n\nI faced this situation in 1980 and we are still happily .....most of the time :).....married.
244874
first you need to find out if it is legal to run an add in a paper letting the person know youre divorcing him. cuz in some states you can get in touch with someone and they will run an add in the paper and your spouse will have a certain amount of time to answer,if he does not answer, your granted the divorce, so ask the court house or talk to a lawyer. good luck
558980
It might not be a bad idea to take as much time as you can afford to get away and go see your family.  Before you go sit him down and explain that you love him but you feel that you are in this marriage by yourself.  Tell him that you are going to take some time away from him and you want him to see how he feels being alone.  Its not a separation per say but some time apart may be beneficial for both of you.  Sometimes people get comfortable in their marriages and take each other for granted.  Perhaps if you weren't there he would realize all he would lose if you divorced him one day.  On the other hand he may not and you need to be prepared for that.  Look at it this way.  I realize that you have 7 years invested in this marriage but there is still time to get out and find someone who appreciates you if you current partner doesn't.  Give him some space but let him know why you are giving it to him.  Let him know that you would like to sit down and talk about both of your feelings when you get back.
193881
Financially, you need to talk every issue out before you move in together.  In marriage I'm a big fan of whats yours is mine and what is mine is yours and no financial separation.  However, when it comes to living together, I think the best way is split everything based upon the percentage of total income each of you brings in.  Other things you need to consider are questions regarding items that you buy together and things such as the lease where both of your names are on legal paper work.  Plan for what if you break up now so that in your life together there is no misunderstandings how things are.  \n\nAs for the rest of moving in together, be flexible.  People change and act different when living together.  Set rules for schedules and cleaning and normal day to day expectations.  If you talk this all out and have know what to expect it makes it so much easier to actually enjoy living together which is what this should really be all about.
242753
My advice to you:\nAll you have to do hun, stay truthful, honest, and love your man. And hopefully he does the same for the rest of your lives. There are no precautions you can take to avoid divorce. Fate brought you 2 together, and your fate lies with you 2. Let it take its course. If youre unsure of this marriage, do you think you should or are ready to get married? Make sure that you guys are 100% ready for this. Get some pre-marriage couseling if you'd like. Like meeting w/ your pastors. Usually that is the first step b/4 getting married anyway. You cant avoid the unavoidable. If its meant to be, it'll last, if its not, it wont. But best wishes to you. And a lifetime of happiness and love!!
485109
Oh man, my hubby and I will be celebrating our 3rd anniversary this Oct and 5 years of being together. It has taken us a long time to figure this one out. The answer sounds so simple but it can take ALLOT of self control and discipline. The key to a successful relationship is having a forgiving, unconditional love for your partner. Being able to accept blame and admit wrong doing and knowing what to do to change is a big key. When we talk "fight" we do not tell the other what we don't like about them but what we recognize they don't like about us. This way its not assigning blame and creating defensive walls but acknowledging wrong and working together to change. We are best friends, lovers, and we embrace all things together as a team. Marriage is the HARDEST thing to do in this journey we call life but I PROMISE it has the largest rewards! My husband and I got divorced last year and realized on the day of our divorce in the courtroom that we were running from our problems and making the biggest mistake of our lives. You have to go THROUGH your problems, you can not avoid them in any way. Good luck to you
67075
What do you want to do?.. Salvage the marriage with some promises from him that he won't do it again, although he will be forever connected to her through their child?\n\nDo you love him, does he still love you? Would dissolving the marriage give you both freedom from a loveless marriage?\n\nIf the answer to that is yes, then I would begin planning the divorce, knowing that happier times will be around the corner, and remember he promised you when he married you to not break that promise, he did, and they (him and his extramarital affair) are liable for the breech of contract of your marriage, so if you need to seek monetary retribution to the chaos of having to end your marriage, I would say the proof of their child will suffice.\n\nIf you do still love him, what is it about him you love?.. Is it enough to have a successful marriage from this point on..(of course maybe after some counseling)  \n\nNo one can tell you what to do in this situation, because everyone always thinks they would leave if this happened to them, but not everyone will.   For whatever reason, sometimes the marriage can go through hell and back and still be a happy ending and stronger for it. \n\n I don't know if you can withstand trying to save this marriage, or if it's even worth your effort.  If he is already committed to her, and you can be ok with allowing him to go to her, then I would.  I wouldn't want to hold onto someone that doesn't want to be with me, or our children.  I would cut ties as peaceful as possible for the children's sake, and find someone who really loves me would be committed to only me, and would set a good example for my children.
476199
I think you guys should see other people first before you start to mend anything. maybe its a mutual separation, and you just dont know it yet. I really think before you do anything just see other people first. if nothing works out, try to mend things between eachother. if you arent willing to separate for a little while, try to mend things by either counseling or talking it out. i hope this helped!
121113
Divorce is the easy way out. But it is a BAD choice.\n\nDo EVERYTHING that you can to make your marriage work.
164151
Separation is the first step before divorce.  In some jurisdictions you have to be separated for a certain amount of time before you can file for a divorce.  It is kind of like a "trial divorce."  For child support it works just the same as divorce.\n\nAlternatively - separation is the equivalent of divorce for couples who are not married but are common-law.
645176
Telling someone that you want to split, it is impossible to avoid at least one very long, involved conversation.\n\nI Guar-an-tee that if you tell him, "i'm not happy anymore" "I don't love you anymore" "I don't feel the same" "I want a divorce" "things have changed" etc, etc, etc; that he will ask "IS THERE SOMEONE ELSE?"  \n\nThe only way to keep him from asking this question is to tell him flat-out "There's someone else."\n\nEven though others have brought up the very valid point that telling him that you are no longer happy in your marriage IS the truth, there's no way of getting out of this without lying unless you admit WHY you are no longer happy.\n\nThere is nothing wrong with what you are going through, it is a shame both for yourself and your husband.  My ADVICE is to come clean up front and tell him why you are leaving.  It might make it easier for him to let you go.  He will, of course, feel betrayed, used, unwanted, inferior and will not have a very high opinion of you.  It might get you the out that you need, to be bluntly honest.\n\nBear in mind two things: In some states, an aggrieved spouse can sue for adultery, "alientation of affections" (targeted at the adulterous spouse's lover) or "Inflicted Induced Emotional Stress" towards, I think, either or both of you.  You'll want to find out via websites or a lawyer if any of these are applicable to your state.\n\nFinally, consider your husband.  Is he the type that might go postal?  An odd and insensitive question, perhaps, but a good number of people have lost their lives to spouses they have hurt.  \n\nConsider all the factors at play and make your decision.  I hope that everything lines up so that you feel (relatively) comfortable in admitting the whole truth, because it can and will be a huge load off of your chest.\n\nI wish you, your husband, and your love all the best.
778441
well in my state when a couple separates one or the other can go to the court house file for temporary custody and the first one of you to do that gets temporary custody . so honey get to the court house before your hubby does.
661179
It's kind of hard asking that question since I'm American and I know the American guidelines.\nThe only thing I can think of is to contact your court system.  Let them know your husband is a bigamist(means being married to more than one person) and that he's living in a different country and what can you do to make things right for yourself along with putting him in his place.