What are your best insults??
536542
Advice for Morons:\n\nYou should be standing in front of Ford. Or chrysler, or chevy...\n\nDo share dirty needles.\n\nI bet you can do windshield washing and 75mph. Go try.\n\nStop, you're straining your brain cell.\n\nYou must be one heck of an inDUHvidual.\n\nHighway 90 needs a tread checker. Hurry.\n\nSee? I told you not to eat those things.\n\nYou should be a bee taster.\n\nYou could get a great job as a crash test dummy.\n\nYou should join the circus, they really need fools like you.\n\nYou throw yourself into your ideas so nicely. Now go dig a well.\n\n    Maybe more later.
696309
"damn, sh*t, respect my f*cking authoritah!"\n\n"dog sh*t taco!"\n\n"blood drenched frozen tampon popsicle!"\n\n"f*cl! sh*t! c*ck! azz! t*tties! b*ner! b*tch! m*ff! p*ssy! c*ck! butthole!  barbra streisand!!!!"
304082
The dude who sits next to me will win craziest/most annoying co-worker in ANY contest!\n \nHe is the most annoying person to ever walk the face of the friggin planet!\n\nHere's the short list of things that irritate me about him:\n\nHis laugh\n\nHis nosey old woman into every attitude \n\nHis voice \n\nHis walk\n \nHis fat butt \n\nHis fat belly \n\nHis smell - he smokes like he's trying to get cancer \n\nDid I mention his laugh sounds like fingernails down a chalkboard?\n\nHe talks to his wife every 15 minutes whether he needs to or not.\n\nHe argues with his wife every 30 minutes whether he needs to or not.\n\nHe talks to his too young to talk on the phone daughter every 30 minutes.\n\nHe hasn't learned a thing about inside voices.\n\nDid I mention his laugh?\n\nHe's a mooch.  I brought in chocolate chip cookies today.  He made fun of me because they weren't homemade, but has since proceeded to eat 11 of them.  I know - I've counted.\n\nHe hockers into his garbage can non stop!\n\nDid I mention the laugh?\n\nI'm listening to music on the internet so he 1) won't try to talk to me and 2) so I don't have to friggin hear his voice, laugh, hockering, conversations with his wife, but don't worry - He came over and took my headsets off my head so he could talk to me.\n\nI'm seriously going to lose it one day!  He is like \nevery annoying idiot you've ever known, wrapped into one weirdo!  Then multiply by 10!
1152877
CANTCU. \nYou can report me also. \nYou are a Fucking  twat of the highest calibre. \nBy the way a twat is an insult.
1115177
My BOSS!  The jerk who got mad at me this morning because I went to the restroom and wasn't there to pick up his phone call, the jerk who yelled at me for not sending him the e-mail he requested (and then I found the e-mail on his inbox unread half hour later) and finally...the guy that just asked me if we got a fax from his doctor when I had given it to him (in hands) less than 20 minutes ago.\nIf I could...I would hack into his eharmony.com account and change his profile from "charming gentleman" to "old pervert"!
206875
i think that i have already emailed you my insult..i dont think that i will post that for everyone to see..lol.once again sorry..\n\nI think that i deserve the 10 points..lol
781472
When you are  staked, roasting slowly in the pit of Hell, while the  `Dev` prods you, and taunts you with ice cold Lager shandy and choc-ices, then you will realise it`s better than nothing.     PS. I have resisted the temptation to insult you despite your use of  the girlie threat  "I can report you" !  Don`t be afraid of insults, fight your corner.
917777
Calling you obscene names
1004183
What?\n\n  you have offended my honor,\n\nI challenge you to a duel.\n(d*** face.)
990027
TAKING YOUR JOB U COMPLACENT FAT YANKEE MOTHERFUCKER AND THEN BANGING YOUR WIFE\n\nPS: PLEASE CHOKE YOU NAZI GOAT RAPIST
929769
Make like a goalie and drop it\nmake like a politician and lie\nmake like the wind and blow\nmake like a fire and go out\nmake like a really serious answer on Yahoo answers and be ignored\n\nOK these are crap but what do you expect from me? witty remarks?
1163407
I can give you a bunch of old ones to tide you over while you read the 'bad' ones in your email. \n May the fleas of a thousand camels infest your armpits!\nMay you be blest with diamonds, emeralds and rubies; and may they all be found in your gall bladder!\nMay you be blest with many children, may your children be blest with many children and may they all live under your roof!\nIf I had a dog as ugly as you, I would shave his butt and teach him to walk backward!\nYou were so ugly when you were born, the doctor smacked your mother!\nYou were so ugly when you were little that they fed you in the dark with a slingshot.\nYou were so ugly when you were little that they tied a porkchop around your neck to get the dog to play with you!\n\nthat is all for now
366573
Mabe your asking the wrong questions? Hmm Im stumped... Im only mean to people who are mean to me... Heidi
834853
You are wise beyond your years.  Actually I like your questions and answers, but I agree, insults from either side are no way to answer or ask
298330
honestly i have a lot of words I'll give you some(w/ reasons):\n\ndamn-people say that 2 me\n\na** h***-they hurt feelings\n\ndarn-they tease me by using these words\n\nse*-they use it in other terms esp. green minded people\n\nsh**-one of my former frends told me that\n\nstupid a**-hurts peoples feelings\n\nf***-its irritating!and its a bad word w/ a dirty finger...\n\nand a zillion more
1013905
Be who you are.  Learn to let it slide off you.  When someone insults you, either don't answer at all, or shrug like so what.  You don't have to make excuses for who you are, or feel bad about it.
364903
Having a bad day???? this one is on anger management...\nhehehheeehhe nice one... \n\nAnger Management \n\nWhen you occasionally have a really bad day, and you just need \n\nTo take it out on someone, don't take it out on someone you know, take it out on someone you don't know. I was sitting at my desk when I remembered a phone call I had forgotten to make. I found the number and\n\ndialed it. A man answered, saying, "Hello." I politely said, "This is\n\nFred Hannifin. Could I please speak with Robin Carter?" \n\nSuddenly, the phone was slammed down on me. I couldn't believe that anyone could be so rude.\n\nI tracked down Robin's correct number and called her. I had\n\ntransposed the last two digits of her phone number. After hanging up with her, I decided to call the 'wrong' number again. \n\n\nWhen the same guy answered the phone, I yelled, "You're an asshole!" \n\nand hung up. \n\nI wrote his number down with the word 'asshole' next to it, and \n\nput it in my desk drawer. Every couple of weeks, when I was paying \n\nbills or had a really bad day, I'd call him up and yell, "You're an \n\nasshole!" \n\n\nIt always cheered me up. When Caller ID came to our area, I thought my\n\ntherapeutic 'asshole' calling would have to stop. So, I called his\n\nnumber and said, \n\n"Hi, this is John Smith from the Telephone Company. I'm just calling to \n\nsee if you're familiar with the Caller ID program?" He yelled, \n\n"NO!" and slammed the phone down. I quickly called him back and said, \n\n"That's because you're an asshole!" \n\n\nOne day I was at the store, getting ready to pull into a parking spot. Some guy in a black BMW cut me off and pulled into the spot I had patiently waited for. I hit the horn and yelled that I had \n\nbeen waiting for the spot. The idiot ignored me. \nI noticed a "For Sale" sign in his car window ... so, I wrote down his\n\nnumber. A couple of days later, right after calling the first asshole, \n\n(I had his number on speed dial), I thought I had better call the BMW \n\nasshole, too. I said, "Is this the man with the black BMW for sale?" \n\n"Yes, it is." "Can you tell me where I can see it?"\n\n"Yes, I live at 1802 West 34th Street. It's a yellow house, and the\n\ncar's parked right out in front." "What's your name?" I asked. \n\n"My name is Don Hansen," he said. \n\n"When's a good time to catch you, Don?" \n\n"I'm home every evening after five." \n\n"Listen, Don, can I tell you something?" \n\n"Yes?" \n\n"Don, you're an asshole." Then I hung up, and added his number to \n\nmy speed dial, too. Now, when I had a problem, I had two assholes \n\nto call. But after several months of calling them, it wasn't as enjoyable as it used to be. So, I came up with an idea. \n\n\nI called Asshole #1. \n\n"Hello." \n\n"You're an asshole!" (But I didn't hang up.) \n\n"Are you still there?" he asked. \n\n"Yeah," I said. \n\n"Stop calling me," he screamed. \n\n"Make me," I said. \n\n"Who are you?" he asked. \n\n"My name is Don Hansen." \n\n"Yeah? Where do you live?" \n\n"Asshole, I live at 1802 West 34th Street, a yellow house, with my black Beamer parked in front." \nHe said, "I'm coming over right \n\nnow, Don. And you had better start saying your prayers."\n\nI said, "Yeah, like I'm really scared, asshole." \n\n\nThen I called Asshole #2. \n\n"Hello?" he said. \n\n"Hello, asshole," I said. \n\nHe yelled, "If I ever find out who you are?" \n\n"You'll what?" I said. \n\n"I'll kick your ***," he exclaimed. \n\nI answered, "Well, asshole, here's yo