How do I ask my friends to not be concerned about my open relationship?
537366
Be honest about your feelings about the situation.  Be sure about your decision.  Be unfazed by their opinions.  Be caring and understanding of their concerns.  Listen respectfully to all they say and honor them and their opinions - they love you and want the best for you.  Honor that about them and thank them for their concerns - tell them the bottom line is always:  My life, my choice.
214768
You will have to just tell them this is what I want and you are alienating the person I want to be with and the person I love. Say to them you don't have to agree with this but show me some respect and be civil to my soon to be partner. If you stand firm and maybe come a little clean about your part in the problem, this should help, but some people just are stubborn and you'll have to deal with that.
676351
DO FOR OTHERS WHAT YOU WANT THEM TO DO FOR YOU......!!!\nI mean if you had a boy/girlfriend dear to you who's cheating behind your back,would you like your friends to keep it secretly from you ? Dont think so.\nFor me I would definitly more than just tell him/her the truth, I would kick that cheaters butt all the way to kingdom come......NO KIDDING
857213
Just live with it.  Later in life you will notice your friends dont matter all that matter is the person u go to sleep with at nite and the one you wake up with.  She loves you and you love her so who cares what they say they are jealous cause they wish they could have that type of relationship.
1120255
sometimes we as individuals grow up...our eyes become open and we see things and people for who they really are. You can not save everybody without sometimes putting your own self in jeopardy. It sounds like your relationship with this set of friends is unhealthy. You should draw back from this group take a breath of fresh air and open yourself to people who want to enjoy life and who are not emotionally immature.
562468
You sound like a very loving person. It sounds like you have a wonderful friendship with your friend. And I think that the basis of friendship is honesty. \nI think you should consider telling the guy, when he calls, to be honest with his girl. Convince him to tell her how he feels. He sounds like he isn't as honest to his girl"friend" as you are. \nIf he isn't very cooperative at being honest and continues the discrete behavior, ask your friend in a round about way like:\n"Hey, there is something I think you should know but I am pretty sure it will upset you. Do you want me to tell you?"\n\nShe will say yes, and if so proceed slowly no need to get it all out right away, ease her into it with something like:\n"Ok, I'm not sure his intentions or if he has even told you about it... I hope he has but it feels like hes being discrete about it which is why I think you should know..." etc etc\n\nDon't forget to reassure her that you value your friendship and that you truly hoped the sexual playtime would help her relationship but that you don't want to feel that the encounter is part of some hidden agenda.\n\nAsk her how she wants you to handle future encounters with him, her, and them. She may want you in the relationship, she may want him out. The most important thing is being honest upfront to avoid any misunderstandings. \n\nSame thing with him, if you value his company treat him the same way, honestly. \nIf he is being pushy, ask him questions... this slows guys down and makes them thing more about the conversation and its potential for direction rather than the goal(i.e. "getting" the girl) and read his responses. \nDishonest people are easy to read because it feels dishonest.\nAnd don't forget that you can cross reference everything said by either of them with the significant other for even more insight into who's telling what to whom.\n\nIf your lucky everything will workout and they will love you for being a very big help, a very loving friend, and an honest person. \nIf not hopefully you can salvage 1 of the relationships be that theirs, you & hers, or you and his. \nDon't forget to be honest to yourself too, Ask yourself what scenerio you would like the most. Then tell them about it. Honesty has power unlimited when used properly.
1166001
If they're both okay with it, then there's no problem.\nMake sure that you're careful and use protection, because while you are honest about who you're sleeping with, doesn't mean that they are.
565834
Personally, when I found myself in this very predicament, I made a conscious decision to approach the situation from an honest, adult perspective and expressed my concerns to both my friend and my boyfriend. \n\nBecause I trust my boyfriend, I explained how uncomfortable my friend's behaviour toward him made me, and asked that he help me by not reacting positively to her flirting. He was happy to do so, because he found her behaviour just as inappropriate as I had.\n\nI explained to my friend, privately, that, although I value her friendship, her flirting behaviour toward my boyfriend made me uncomfortable and was jeopardising the future of our friendship. I asked her to tone herself down and respect my feelings. When I discovered that she could not oblige me that, then I did, and still do, my utmost ensure that my boyfriend and my friend spend the least amount of time together as possible. It doesn't mean I don't see either of them less frequently, I just don't see them at the same time anymore.\n\nIt may be that my friend is jealous of the fantastic relationship between my boyfriend and me, and either consciously or not, wants us to split up so that I may be as miserable as she is in the relationship department... who knows. \n\nEither way, the key is to remain adult in your thoughts, and not give in to the childish part of yourself that goes "OMG what a b*tch I can't believe she's trying to steal my boyfriend I'm going to make her pay" or similar, and to trust the man you love.
208674
Its a breach of trust between you and your so-called friend. It is public unless you can get it removed. How do you stop people looking? Your friend needs a kick in the morals.
717700
you need to comfront him/her about it. you dont have to acuse them of anything, you just need to ask. if your relationship is strong enough it will all work out.
965100
Ask your b/f what he thinks about being in an open relationship and if he is OK with it then you are safe.  I would still tell him about your 'thug' fling but not right after you ask him about the open relationship thing.  Also if he says he is not into an open relationship then I don't know what you are going to do! I guess at that point in time you are just going to have to decide which one of these guys is more important to you and which one you want to keep in your life! Good luck with it BigGuy! *hugs* JAC<\nin Hamilton, Ontario, Canada
141572
well, the sad truth is that you can't tell your boyfriend who to be friends with.  I understand that you don't like his friend, and that maybe you don't even like who your boyfriend becomes when he is with his friend.  But you can't change him.  You can tell him your concerns and hope that he cares enough for you to stop hanging around with his friend when he is going to strip clubs, but other than that, there really isn't anything that you can do.  Look sweetie, you will learn that you really can't worry about whether or not your man is going to cheat.  If he is, then he is, and if he isn't then you don't need to worry.  but you worrying isn't going to do anything other than make you sick, ya know?  So, just find a way to be happy and comfortable in your relationship.  Be faithful to him and hope that he is doing the same thing.  Trust in your relationship.  This will save you a lot of anguish and pain in the long run.\n\nGood luck!
641355
Just say, "Look, I think you're awesome, and I don't want to hurt your feelings or anything like that, but right now, I'd rather be just friends with you instead of boyfriend-girlfriend.  Later on, who knows?  But for now, let's just stay friends."
574782
All u can do is give ppl time, get to know them and dont give too much of urself way to fast, give it time, sooner or later u will know who is really worthy of ur Trust. For my opinion I would have to say it has nothing to do with either men or women, ppl lie,cheat,betray no matter the sex or sexuality. Pick ur friends WISELY. xoxoxoxo
1150650
It's best for you to be a little honest and ask for what you want...you might be ok with it now...but if it keeps up you might get a bit resentful about it. And if you don't tell her, she might not even know! She might think that you are fine the way things are cause you're not saying anything...most important thing I've learned about relationships...gotta ask for what you want...your partner is not a mind reader!
203301
why would you make your freindship a mess by asking this ... i dont think there is a harm to be honest ,,, just be honest and i dont think she will mind it
98011
I would tell him that I'm not up for such an open relationship, and that if he wasn't ready to be with me exclusively, then we couldn't be together. That would be the end of that relationship. Sorry guys but I'm not about to give you permission to practically cheat on me.