i made this guy a poem but does it sound good?
546117
Is your guy, gay??? \n\n(5 out 3) Guys don't like poetry!
802222
Honestly?  I think the poem is too gushy.  If you'd been dating for a while, it'd be great -- but from an anonymous person, the parts about "you're irreplaceable to me" and "my heart will never stop beating  . . ."  are a little creepy.\nI would change it to:\n\nWhen I think of the perfect girl,\nYou come instantly to mind\n\nWith the intellect of a genius,\nEyes that sparkle like gems,\nHair as soft as silk,\nAn angelic voice that sings beautiful melodies to my ears,\nCheeks as adorable and round,\nAnd a smile that lights up even the darkest room\nIt's obvious you are God's work of art\n\nYou're an amazing girl, an amazing person\nSo special to me\nAnd my heart beats gladly\nFor it lives off these feelings I have for you\n\nGood luck!
584252
The world needs more Poets.\n\nI agree grammar is important..unless misuse is deliberate.\n\nI did get a laugh over someone chastising you for poor \n\ngrammar by stating one word was "more correct"!!!\n\nCheck my poems on my Yahoo 360 and let me know what you \n\nthink by posting a comment and voting for favourites.\n\nA 360 site would be a good way for you to post your works \n\nas well.\n\n\nGood Luck\n\nJimmy
755055
i think ur usuing ur talents in the wrong way. Y dont u re read ur poem then ask ur self what is wrong with it
286602
Tell him how you feel, use more descriptive words and lots of imaginations.  Go with the flow!
807283
It's interesting, as a poem I would have stopped at struggle to change as a song its fine to continue, Some grammatical and punctuation errors, I would accept it as a work in progress. :-) good luck and keep writing
157505
Its really not bad.  For only 13 you do show a lot of talent.  It shows both love and hardship.  I would give it a 7.5.  If you are planning on giving it to a girl though, I would try something on the more lighter side.  Girls like sappy.  Also, submit your poem to poetry.com.  Its free and you get a free copywrite for it.  Good job
722502
It seems to be well written, I like it, except maybe you could add a stronger conclusion to the poem. :)
607040
id listen to your poetry i love poetry and write a little myself but its not that good I am guessing that your a teenager and so am i and Im pretty mature myself so email me!!!!!!!!!
260396
A good song always starts with a poem.Why dont you try singing out those poem you wrote and come up with a good tune then sing it to him,for a change...if you can't sing,then let somebody else sing it for you...POETS ARE CREATIVE..be one..
534436
Good Poem.......lots of potential! Keep it up!! Good Luck on the girlfriend too.....she's out there!!
63659
well its good that u are putting ur emotions into poetry. its good karthasis.\nthe point of the poem seems to go a little askew in terms of imagery. in one sense u seem to be talking about nobody, then u jump to falling down. the transition isnt subtle enough.\ni also think u need to work on the rhthym of your poem. it's hard to get the right mood when reading it, if u've left this major component in poetry writing out. \nhope u dont get offended, i am simply trying to offer constructive criticism. i'd would have also like to have known, the title of your poem :)
687072
You sound as though you were hurt quite badly by your best friend.  Losing a good friend over a bloke is not worth it.  Blokes are easy to get, good friends are not.  With regards to the poem, I dont think you will win any awards with it, but keep trying, however do not give up your day job just yet.
656494
I REALLY like it\n\nand if you are 13, it's a great job. \n\nYou have immense talent. Keep it up.\n\nYou may also want to submit it on poetry.com
714422
that poem was so sweet im crying now\n\nu would be a great poet u have got a good talent :) xx
935796
It's ok, but just not my style of poetry.\nIt needs to have a rhythm.\n\nIt might work better using the japanese haiku style.\n\nOk, I did just a slight altering. See if this works better.\n\nI really like sports football is my thang,\nAnd Peyton Manning is the man of the game. \n\nI love the colts  and you might be surprised, \nthat any girl on the planet likes to watch sweaty guys\n\nI really like football and someday I'll be\na pro football player on a pro football team.
856647
no way man, i didnt even read this poem and i know its a bad idea. if you like a girl and nothing is going down yet, a poem will sink your ship my friend. way, way too much. think simpler