I NEED YOUR HELP AND OPINIONS!!! Love & Trust... Serious Answers/Responses ONLY! 10 Pts!!!?
552074
Personally, I think that you need to realize your self-worth. You deserve more than she is apparently willing to give you. It sounds like you are in prison and she is the warden. I understand that she had problems before, but it is not fair to make other people pay for it. You can take situations in life one of two ways...either bitter or better. Sounds to me like she has taken the bitter road. But it sounds like you have taken the better road, and if you two are not on the same page it won't work. You really need to (and I am too) pray for her, because she apparently has issues that she needs to deal with. I think for now you should move on with your life. Maybe when she realizes what she has lost due to not being able to let go of the past, then maybe she will change her tune. There is nothing to say she isn't the one for you, but it certainly doesn't sound like she is the one for you right now. But God can work on her and turn her into the person you need her to be. If not, I know God will send you the right one, and she will treat you like a King and give you more love than your heart can receive. I pray for your situation. Sorry so lengthy! God Bless!
196962
Trust is really important in a relationship. If he is an understanding husband, he would have known that you didn't mean it. But as a caring wife, you should talk with him calmly and nicely that you love him and want him to forgive you. A little bit of "sorry" won't do anything bad to your health =)
529862
Communication & patience. Always be open about how you feel and be willing to work out the problems that come along, because there will always be problems, no matter who you're with. But if you're both on the same page about what you want and are willing to give what the other needs, you will be able to conquer anything. Love is not enough, it takes work! :)
130455
Trust is something that is earned and can be destroyed so easily.  She has to understand that you have done nothing to make here distrust you and  even though she is hurting, you are there to listen. Sometimes just being a listner will truly show your intentions more than trying to convince otherwise. Actions speak louder than words and she will know this once the heart heals. Right now she is hurting and that will cloud her thoughts, just give it time as time heals most.  Be there when she needs you but dont crowd her.  \nIt is a shame that people today forget what trust is and what commitment is about. So often men and woment run to the next thing that may look better than the person we are with, but you have to stop and ask-- is this worth losing what I got now for something I know nothing about...
403937
You're absolutlly right. You MUST have trust and honesty in a relationship. You can't build one on a foundation of lies. The relationship will only fall apart and cause pain for you. Of caurse love plays a major role in all relationships too, :)
847211
Hi........I was an emotionally impaired woman until I met my fiance. I put him through so many changes because I had been so hurt in all of my relationships. My biggest obstacle was trust. I accused him with no basis and on some level I think I tried to sabotage the relationship because in my mind it would be just like all the others. One day he looked me right in the eye and said " I know what you are doing; and just to let you know, I'm not going anywhere ". He saw something in me that I didn't see in myself and I did everything I could from that moment on to change and put my trust in him. I love him more than I could express. He is like no other man I've known and I am so grateful he stuck it out with me. I know it's alot to ask of you to put up with the emotional baggage alot of women bring in a relationship, but you may just turn out to be the man that touches her heart and shows her that not all men are users and scammers. You may end up being the man that shows her how to love and trust again. Even if the relationship doesn't last, what you will have taught her will last forever.
522098
Hey man, I think you should sit back and really think about your relationship, the first thing you should consider is her consideration of your feelings and perception of the situation  in general. If trust is there AND... a MUTUAL level of respect for each others feelings is there, somehow things will work, I feel once those things aren't in place your outta gas.
125853
Blessings.\n\nMay I answer your question with a questions of my own? First, are you sure that these feelings you have for this new guy (let's name him "Ted" for the sake of easier understanding) are legit (real)? If not, that is part of what I think you should question yourself... along with asking "Ted" if his feelings for you are legit.\n\nSecond, if you are "committed" to someone else (let's name him "Al" for the sake of easier understanding) but these feelings that you have for "Ted" are so overwhelming, why are you in this relationship with "Al"? And if these feelings that "Ted" has for you are so overwhelming, why is he in another supposedly-committed relationship with "Sue"? It would seem, in my opinion, that you would tell "Al" (and "Ted" would tell "Sue") how you truly felt instead of leading him on to believe that this love that you two (you and "Al" -- "Ted" and "Sue") share is being reciprocated when, in fact, it is not.\n\nIt would be wise, I would imagine, to put this situation into perspective. Consider what it is (and who it is) that you truly wish to be with. Think carefully and tread softly for the waters (and feelings) you tread upon can be disturbed. You don't want a typhoon to come ripping apart your life. Trust me, I've been there! God bless!\n\nHope that helped!
459092
Call him on it.  It sounds like neither of you trust each other, so if you get down to the root of the problem, hopefully you can overcome it.  Have you done anything for him to feel betrayed?  It sounds like he's reading them.  Just call him on it and have a conversation about it.
1102762
Trust is paramount in any relationship in order for it to have a chance.  Trust takes time to acquire in any relationship, but here it is an issue right off the bat.  I always fine that it's best to give someone the benefit of the doubt. You really can't change people, they've got to change themselves. Now that doesn't mean that you can't support them along their road to a better them, or that you can't offer advice or set out ground rules.\nWe all have our pasts, and have done things we're not proud of. \n\nIf you're going to embark on forging a relationship with this guy, i would tread lightly and carefully.  As far as the cheating goes, i know the general perception is, once a cheater, always a cheater.  However, i think it's possible for people to turn over a new leaf.  Many guys through a period where they are a bit of a "slag". This is not to excuse your current love interest's actions, but it's usually the way of things.  It's kind of more widly accepted in society for men to play the field a lot more than women.  The fact that he's cheated on ALL his girlfriends would definitely give me pause, but we all have to grow up sometime.  I would also take into consideration who gave you the information on his less than monogomous ways. If he told you, i think that says something about him. If he was open and honest enough to share with you his less than stellar relationship habits in the past, then that shows that he might truly be wanting to change his ways. If, on the other hand, you had to find this out through a mutual friend, or past girl-friends, well, that's not good at all. \n\nAlso, you mentioned that he treated a close friend of yours badly.  If we're talking verbal, emotional, or physical abuse here, then stay away. Stay far far away.   \n\nI think perhaps you need to sit him down and lay some ground rules.  If you care about him enough to give this a go, despite his bad rep, you need to clearly voice your worries and apprehensions when it comes to him.  Let him know that you respect yourself far too much to put up with cheating or abuse in any form.  He needs to understand that your trust is going to take time to earn, and if he really cares about you, he will work hard to get it.  The right person can change your life, make you a better person, you just might be his inspiration for change.\n\nBest of luck!
147916
With time. Don't expect it to happen immidiately.\nI went through the same, and it took time... sometimes I think I still don't trust anyone, but be forgiving of yourself, and definitely give it time.\nGood luck!!
36536
Depends on if you trust him or not. If he's trustworthy then you should believe him...if you have that gut feeling that he just isn't telling you how he seriously feels..then you should try to find someone who WOULD give anything for you. Good Luck!
444807
First of all Thank you for serving our country! If you want to save this relationship you will have to work on the trust issue. But I would be concerned about her cheating again. Follow your heart.
839218
Hi TaTa,   I hate to see you get hurt,but this guy is a player.He only cares about hisself and his needs.You will never be happy with this jerk. The problem is you cannot ever trust him again. Without trust you don't have a relationship.Besides that he will do it again and again. Kick his sorry A S S to the hurb, and find you a man who will treat you, and your baby with respect,trust and a caring man.You deserve alot better than your getting from the jerk. I'm wishing you and your baby all the luck and have a happy life. A Friend.\n\n  Clowmy
1108938
Ohhh, that's a tough one. Your relationship can not last if its built on a foundation of distrust. Especially since he has told you that he will not trust you. I went through a similar situation, and you both have to ask yourselves, "Can I drop the past of my partner and move on, on a positive note. If your can't answer "yes" than you need to take a step back and reevaluate your relationship and decide if its worth living a life of suspicion and distrust. Counseling will help. Good luck!!
828575
If you have issues with trust, why are you dating someone in another state? I dated my husband long distance for almost 4 years and never had to follow any kind of rules such as these...if he had said we needed rules about calling or texting, I would have known I didn't need him because he didn't trust me. I think you totally did the right thing...now this guy can find someone that will trust him and not put him under her thumb.
752265
Turn it around and tell him he obviously doesn't trust you, which means he doesn't care (feel love) for you.\nNow have HIM prove it if he doesn't agree!  ;-)