yo mamma joke please.? short will B sweet. other jokes 2 ok?
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Yo Mama Jokes [collected by Lamda]\n-----------------------------------------\n\n\nYo mama is so ugly:\n\n\nYo mama so ugly when she joined an ugly contest, they said "Sorry, no professionals."\n\nYo mama so ugly she looks out the window and got arrested for mooning.\n\nYo mama so ugly just after she was born, her mother said "What a treasure!" and her father said "Yes, let's go bury it."\n\nYo mama so ugly they push her face into dough to make gorilla cookies.\n\nYo mama so ugly they filmed "Gorillas in the Mist" in her shower\n\nYo mama so ugly they didn't give her a costume when she tried out for Star Wars.\n\nYo mama so ugly instead of putting the bungee cord around her ankle, they put it around her neck\n\nYo mama so ugly she gets 364 extra days to dress up for Halloween.\n\nYo mama so ugly when she walks into a bank, they turn off the surveillence cameras\n\nYo mama so ugly her mom had to be drunk to breast feed her\n\nYo mama so ugly her mom had to tie a steak around her neck to get the dogs to play with her.\n\nYo mama so ugly when she walks down the street in September, people say "Wow, is it Halloween already?"\n\nYo mama so ugly the government moved Halloween to her birthday.\n\nYo mama so ugly that if ugly were bricks she'd have her own projects.\n\nYo mama so ugly they pay her to put her clothes on in strip joints.\n\nYo mama so ugly she made an onion cry.\n\nYo mama so ugly they filmed "Gorillas in the Mist" in her shower!\n\nYo mama so ugly when they took her to the beautician it took 12 hours. . .for a quote!\n\nYo mama so ugly they put her in dough and made monster cookies!\n\nYo mama so ugly she tried to take a bath the water jumped out!\n\nYo mama so ugly she looks out the window and gets arrested!\n\nYo mama so ugly even Rice Krispies won't talk to her!\n\nYo mama so ugly Ted Dansen wouldn't date her!\n\nYo mama so ugly for Halloween she trick or treats on the phone!\n\nYo mama so ugly she turned Medusa to stone!\n\nYo mama so ugly The NHL banned her for life\n\nYo mama so ugly she gets 364 extra days to dress up for Halloween!\n\nYo mama so ugly the government moved Halloween to her birthday!\n\nYo mama so ugly if ugly were bricks she'd have her own projects!\n\nYo mama so ugly they pay her to put her clothes on in strip joints\n\nYo mama so ugly she made an onion cry!\n\nYo mama so ugly people go as her for Halloween.\n\nYo mama so ugly that when she sits in the sand on the beach, cats try to bury her.\n\nYo mama so ugly she scares the roaches away.\n\nYo mama so ugly we have to tie a steak around your neck so the dog will play with her!\n\nYo mama so ugly I heard that your dad first met her at the pound.\n\nYo mama so ugly that if ugly were bricks she'd have her own projects.\n\nYo mama so ugly that your father takes her to work with him so that he doesn't have to kiss her goodbye.\n\n\n---x---\n\n\nYo mama is so stupid:\n\n\nYo mama so stupid it took her 2 hours to watch 60 minutes\n\nYo mama so stupid when she saw the NC-17 (under 17 not admitted) sign, she went home and got 16 friends\n\nYo mama so stupid when your dad said it was chilly outside, she ran outside with a spoon\n\nYo mama so stupid she told everyone that she was "illegitiment" because she couldn't read\n\nYo mama so stupid that she puts lipstick on her head just to make-up her mind\n\nYo mama so stupid she hears it's chilly outside so she gets a bowl\n\nYo mama so stupid you have to dig for her IQ!\n\nYo mama so stupid she got locked in a grocery store and starved!\n\nYo mama so stupid it took her 2 hours to watch 60 Minutes!\n\nYo mama so stupid that she tried to put M&M's in alphabetical order!\n\nYo mama so stupid she could trip over a cordless phone!\n\nYo mama so stupid she sold her car for gasoline money!\n\nYo mama so stupid she bought a solar-powered flashlight!\n\nYo mama so stupid she thinks a quarterback is a refun
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yo mama teeth so yellow when she drinks water it turns to lemonade, yo mama teeth so yellow when she walks into church the choir starts to sing let it shine, let it shine, let it shineeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!! yo mama so fat it took me 4 trains, 3 bus and 1 truck to get on her good side. yo moma so fat when she went on the scale it said to be continued............ yo moma so fat when she step on a dollar she made change. yo moma house so small,when we order a large size pizza, we gat to eat it outside. yo moma so fat she had to wear plastic bag for church shoes. yo moma so fat i thought she was on slimfast.
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Yo Mamma's so fat when I have sex with her I have to slap her *** and ride the wave in. \n\n\nYo Mamma's so fat when she put high heels she struct oil!\n\n\nYo mama so fat when her beeper goes off, people thought she was backing up \n\n\nYo mama so fat she eats Wheat Thicks. \n\n\nYo mama so fat people jog around her for exercise \n\n\nYo mama so fat she went to the movies and sat next to everyone \n\n\nYo mama so fat she has been declared a natural habitat for Condors \n\n\nYo mamma so fat you have to roll over twice to get off her... \n\n\nYo mama so fat she was floating in the ocean and spain claimed her for then new world \n\n\nYo mama so fat she lay on the beach and people run around yelling Free Willy \n\n\nYo mama so fat when she has wants someone to shake her hand, she has to give directions! \n\n\nYo mama so fat she goes to a resturant, looks at the menu and says "okay!" \n\n\nYo mama so fat when she wears a yellow raincoat, people said "Taxi!" \n\n\nYo mama so fat she had to go to Sea World to get baptized \n\n\nYo mama so fat she got to iron her pants on the driveway \n\n\nYo mama so fat she put on her lipstick with a paint-roller \n\n\nYo mama so fat she got to pull down her pants to get into her pockets \n\n\nYo mama so fat when she tripped over on 4th Ave, she landed on 12th \n\n\nYo mama so fat the highway patrol made her wear "Caution! Wide Turn" \n\n\nYo mama so fat when she sits around the house, she SITS AROUND THE HOUSE! \n\n\nYo mama so fat when she steps on a scale, it read "one at a time, please" \n\n\nYo mama so fat she fell in love and broke it. \n\n\nYo mama so fat when she gets on the scale it says to be continued. \n\n\nYo mama so fat when she gets on the scale it says we don't do livestock. \n\n\nYo mama so fat she's got her own area code! \n\n\nYo mama so fat God couldn't light Earth until she moved! \n\n\nYo mama so fat whenever she goes to the beach the tide comes in! \n\n\nYo mama so fat when she plays hopscotch, she goes New York, L.A., Chicago... \n\n\nYo mama so fat she's got Amtrak written on her leg. \n\n\nYo mama so fat her legs is like spoiled milk - white & chunky! \n\n\nYo mama so fat I had to take a train and two buses just to get on the her good side! \n\n\nYo mama so fat she wakes up in sections! \n\n\nYo mama so fat when she goes to an amusement park, people try to ride HER! \n\n\nYo mama so fat she sat on a quarter and a booger shot out of george washington's nose. \n\n\nYo mama so fat she rolled over 4 quarters and it made a dollar! \n\n\nYo mama so fat when she lies on the beach no one else gets sun! \n\n\nYo mama so fat when she bunje jumps she goes straight to hell! \n\n\nYo mama so fat when she jumps up in the air she gets stuck!!! \n\n\nYo mama so fat she's got more Chins than a Hong Kong phone book! \n\n\nYo mama so fat that her senior pictures had to be arial views! \n\n\nYo mama so fat she's on both sides of the family! \n\n\nYo mama so fat everytime she walks in high heels, she strikes oil! \n\n\nYo mama so fat she fell and made the Grand Canyon! \n\n\nYo mama so fat she sat on the beach and Greenpeace threw her in! \n\n\nYo mama so fat even her clothes have stretch marks! \n\n\nYo mama so fat she has a wooden leg with a kickstand! \n\n\nYo mama so fat she has to use a VCR as a beeper! \n\n\nYo mama so fat she broke her leg, and gravy poured out! \n\n\nYo mama so fat when she rides in a hot air balloon, it looks like she's wearin tights! \n\n\nYo mama so fat she got hit by a parked car! \n\n\nYo mama so fat they have to grease the bath tub to get her out! \n\n\nYo mama so fat she has a run in her blue-jeans! \n\n\nYo mama so fat when she gets on the scale it says to be continued. \n\n\nYo mama so fat when she wears a yellow raincoat people say "Taxi!" \n\n\nYo mama so fat she got to iron her pants on the driveway! \n\n\nYo mama so fat she put on her lipstick with a paint-roller! \n
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like ur jokes bit whats the sperm one?
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haha, i really liked the second joke.  Thanks for sharing.
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Yo mama so stupid she got locked in a grocery store and starved!\nYo mama so stupid she sold her car for gasoline money\nYo mama so stupid she sits on the TV, and watches the couch!
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Go here:\n\nhttp://yahooligans.yahoo.com/content/jokes/
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Yo mama so fat she went to the movies and sat next to everyone\n\nYo mama so fat she goes to a resturant, looks at the menu and says "okay!"\n\nYo mama so stupid she could trip over a cordless phone!\n\nYo mama so stupid she thinks a quarterback is a refund!
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Yo mama so stupid, she got fired from the M&M factory for throwing away all the W's\n\nI heard that as a blond joke once too:)
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Yo momma's so fat that she sat on a rainbow and skittles popped out.\n\nYo momma's so short, she jumped off a curb and committed suicide.\n\nYo momma's so stupid she got hit by a parked car.
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if i made u laugh, would u please give me ten points???\nbecoz i never had 10 pts. in my life ever!!!\npromiz...\n\nseller: can i help u sir?\nman: my wife needs bra but i dont know the size.\nseller: touch my breast sir and try to estimate.\nman: oh, i 4got she needs underwear too!!!\nhahaha....
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OK those jokes are pretty good and i also have one here waiting for you\n\nWhat did the pirate say after someone asked why there was a steering wheel in his pants.\n\nhe says: Argghh its driving me nuts! hehe sorry its kinda dirty but it was good (to me it was good)
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LMFAO great jokes!!! Love your sense of humor it is wonderful!!
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Cute little 5 year old Daisy ...?\nSees a group of surly workmen turn up next door 2 build a house. She takes an interest & starts to talk to them. The builders with hearts of gold adopt her as a site mascot.\n\nAfter a week they present her with a pink hat & gloves, and even a wage packet of £5. Goodness says mummy smiling, are you working there next week ..?\n\nDaisy replies:\n\n"I think so mummy, provided the cnuts from Jewsons deliver the fcuking bricks!! "\n\n This joke brought to you by Bad B in the jokes/riddles section: hope you don't find it too offensive!!!!\n\nM  :  )
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That's the best joke I've heard on this site in a LONG time!\n\nThanks for the laughs! Keep up the great work!!\n\n(Gotta remember this one for the folks at work!)
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Get back with you in a minute...can't stop laughing.\n\n\nI'm back. I haven't laughed so hard in a long time. Thanks. Woke the husband up. And , no.
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101? I ONLY HAVE MY BEST 3 JOKES...HOPE IT DOESN'T OFFEND U\n\n1\n\nFresh from her shower, a woman stands in front of the mirror complaining to her husband that her breasts are too small.\n\nInstead of characteristically telling her it's not so, the husband uncharacteristically comes up with a suggestion. "If you want your breasts to grow, then every day take a piece of toilet paper and rub it between your breasts for a few seconds."\n\nWilling to try anything, the wife fetches a piece of toilet paper and stands in front of the mirror, rubbing it between her breasts.\n\n"How long will this take?" she asks.\n\n"They'll grow larger over a period of years," he replies.\n\nThe wife stops. "Why do you think rubbing a piece of toilet paper between my breasts everyday will make my breasts grow over the years?"\n\n"Worked for your butt, didn't it?"\n\nHe lived. And with a great deal of therapy, may even walk again..\n\n\n2\n\nMan driving down road.\nWoman driving up same road\nThey pass each other\nWoman yells out her window, "PIG!"\nMan yells out his window, "B.I.T.C.H!"\nMan rounds next curve\nCrashes into a huge pig in middle of road.\n\nThought For The Day : If only men would listen. \n\n\n3\n\nThe mother-in-law stopped unexpectedly by the recently married couple's \nhouse. She rang the doorbell and stepped into the house. She saw her \ndaughter-in-law standing naked by the door.\n\n"What are you doing?" she asked.\n\n"I'm waiting for my husband to come home from work," the \ndaughter-in-law \nanswered.\n\n"But you're naked!" the mother-in-law exclaimed.\n\n"This is my love dress," the daughter-in-law explained.\n\n"Love dress? But you're naked!"\n\n"My husband loves me to wear this dress! It makes him happy and it \nmakes me \nhappy. I would appreciate it if you would leave because he will be home \nfrom \nwork any minute."\n\nThe mother-in-law was tired of all this romantic talk and left. On the \nway \nhome she thought about the love dress. When she got home she undressed, \nshowered, put on her best perfume and waited by the front door. Finally \nher \nhusband came home. He walked in and saw her standing naked by the door.\n\n"What are you doing?" he asked.\n\n"This is my love dress" she replied.\n\n"Needs ironing." he said.\n\nHEHE>>HAVE FUN 2 YA GUYZ READING