how can I help my husband in his job search...he's giving up hope?
518185
Hi,  \n\n   The most important thing to remember about job searches is that you should use a combination of methods regardless of your location.\n\n    Networking - Register at your local Unemployment Office (you don't need to be on unemployment to register for their assistance). They often will have networking groups on a regular basis. They also are a good source for the jobs that never show up in the paper or online.\n\n    Check your local paper -- In many cases the paper's classified are now online.\n\n    Search Smart Online -- If you don't have a lot of time, spend most of your time at sites that aggregate the job feeds from several job search engines. Prominently these include indeed.com and thingamajob.com.\n\n    Organization -- I am the lead developer of a free online application that allows you to track your ads, jobs you apply for, send or print mail merged correspondence, and track your job search history. This site is jobsearchlog.com \n\nGood Luck,\n\nMichael
900157
First how long has he been out of work and why.  If he has been laid off he is entitled to unemployment.  If he lost his job due to his job moving out of state he is entitled to training or schooling and unemployement.  If he is past that, he should have been using that time to look for work.  He can go to job services (the place that he applied for unemployment at).   They can test him for skills and give him counseling.   He can go to temporary agencies.  Yes, its a temp job but if he is good he can get hired full time.  He needs to work while he retrains himself for the sake of the kids.  If he is married his wife needs to work as well.
790551
Get him a Promise book. You can find them at the christian book store. Honestly we all need to find hope, even- especially the hopeless!
67016
If you think it won't work, quit and get a new job. It's hard to get it out of your head if you see him everyday at work.
712476
You need Jesus Christ in your life in the worst way.  All of us go through hard times--- the Lord knows that I been through my share.  God allows adversity into a person's life in order for them to develop character and spiritual strength.  My suggestion to you is that you do not give up.  there is never success in giving up.  Suicide is never the answer---it is the ultimate expression of failure.  God loves you and he has a plan for you.  Pray----spend your spare time praying.  God answers all prayers in his time according to when he feels that you are ready.  Do not concentrate on the future, but live each day as it comes.  Go to your job every day and do your best for your employer.  Find the joy in the work that you use to have---you might be pleasantly surprised at what changes might come your way.  Ask for extra hours at work----volunteer to do anything that is available no matter how distasteful or demeaning it may seem.  Some of the best promotions that I have received we because I took jobs that nobody else wanted and did them better than anybody before me had done them.  And do not worry----worry is your biggest enemy because it distracts you from the love of God.  Have faith in God to see you through this.  Jesus said, ...."without me ye can do nothing."  Do not try to go it alone----you will never succeed by your own efforts.  Jesus loves you and he wants you to be successful in life.
150157
The fact that you posted this question means that you want to continue working. Have you discussed this with him? If you have, and he refuses to budge about letting you work, then you really need to question your relationship with him. I also have to wonder if he is pressuring you to give up your time with friends and family, too. Does he get upset when you are on the phone too long? Or irritated when it takes you too long at the store? Does he insist on going everywhere with you? All of these things are warning signs that he is controlling, and possesive. Be careful! They are also things that lead to abusive relationships. If he just simply wants you to give up your career, and won't budge about letting you do what you want, you need to ask yourself if you can live like that, or if it's time to move on and find someone who will encourage you to succeed.
483150
WELL, FIRST THING YOU CAN DO, IS TO STOP TRYING TO BE SO DESPERATE... IF WE CAN FEEL IT, HE WILL TOO!!!
338625
Pray, ask friends and family to pray. Well I just mentioned some stuff to my sister in law and she and another friend did this for us.  My sister in law and a good friend of mine and others have put us on a prayer list at Churches. No one can help us with some things right now. \n\nDon't give up. Do the best you can. The rest is not up to us.
400964
you might hafta lay down the law...and just be direct..tell him to either get a job or get lost...no beating around the bush.
791806
First, see if you can't do something to get unstuck - individual or joint counseling, church, communicating more, etc.\n\nIf it is hopeless, then you must decide if staying has more benefits for all concerned than leaving. \n\nChange what you can, and accept what you can't change.
199383
I'd give him an ultimatum, say one month, to change his ways. Tell him if he hasn't found a job in that time, you will leave him. And if he hasn't, do it.
560837
Check his papers.I think he's looking for a job:)
762679
A job search is very stressful, and it can be hard to resist getting very down on yourself and your future.  And, you are right, it doesn't help you land a job to feel defeated before you start.\n\nBut, almost everyone has been in your shoes (or will be at least once in their career), feeling the way you feel.  They survived, and so will you!\n\nJoin a job search support group.  People exchange leads and ideas, and there is usually a leader who is also a job coach.  Most of the time, the cost to attend is minimal.  Often you'll find one in a local church (usually belonging to the church is not a requirement).\n\nThere are "real" ones where people meet in person, locally, and there are "online" ones you connect to via the Internet.\n\nFor the real support group, in the U.S., you would contact your local state Employment Office - http://www.job-hunt.org/state_unemployment_offices.shtml   I'm not sure what you do in the UK, but I'm sure that the government provides some sort of job search assistance and support there, too, probably better than in the US.\n \nFor online support groups, check out http://groups.yahoo.com \n \nJoin a group, and you'll feel much better, even just knowing you're not the only one who is discouraged.\n\nGood luck!
173481
First did he say why he was quitting before he had another job? You sure he didn't get fired and he is covering with this story. Calm down a bit I know it is hard to do but take some deep breaths and see what your options are right now. Will he have a easy time finding another or maybe he has one lined up. If not and he has done this many times in the times in the past than you will need to do what is best for you and the baby...K
1126135
I will pray for your job search and your anxiety.  Sometimes, as I'm sure you're aware, you have to job hop until you find something fulfilling.  That really takes it's toll on you emotionally, but don't stay at a dead end boring job.  Life it too short.  Good Luck!.....)(
1086580
Well, OF COURSE there is hope.  There is also a huge amount of work and effort ahead of the two of you.  Did you move to Germany with the military by any chance ?  \n\nIn any case, he is working and you are in a foreign country which - unless you ARE on a military base  - pretty much precludes you from working too.,  (If you are on a base, go to the Civilian Personnel Office and sign up for the spouse sprefernce jobs.)  Now you need to find some things to fill your time while he works.  That would serve two pruposes: 1) you would be more fulfilled in your own right and 2) there would be less pressure on him to "be" the whole of your life.  Right now it seems, with what little information you have provided, that you are relying on him to make you happy because you have nothing else to take up your time - he, on the other hand, is working and cannot be everything to you.\n\n(By the way, no husband should have to be "everything" to his wife, nor should any wife have to be everything to the husband.  You need to have a life of your own - something that interests you and expands you as a person - something that you bring to the marriage to improve the relationship yo have there.)\n\nIf you are a military spouse - and you can see that I strongly suspect that you are - then you are going to have to get used to the absences.  Check in with the Enlisted Spouses Club and find some other spouses like yourself - some who have been in the service for awhile and get the lowdown from them.  The military is a different life than a civilian one back in the states.\n\nEven without a job, there are many things you can do in Germany!  Oh, you lucky dukling, you!   There is SO MUCH to see over there - it is a beautiful country.  Look into the MWR activities - there should be some inexpensive day trips that are being arranged. Go see things so that you have things to share wiht him.  Make sure the house is kept up - because you are, after all, the housewife at this time.  (Also because the military expects it and it is HE who will be dinged if it is not done.)  That way, when you two DO have time together, it can be relaxing and not filled with "Honey Do" lists.\n\nOnce you build your life there in a way to keep youself busy, and release the pressure on him to take care of your entertainment and social needs, then you can begin to talk to him about spending the time he does have available for you in a quality way.\n\nGood luck!
6748
That's a tough thing for anyone to go through and probably more so for a police officer or detective. That is a high stress and emotionally draining job I would think. Does he go out or stay in a lot? If he stays in a lot, try to get him to go out. He needs to do things to build his self confidence again. Going to the gym, join a group that does things he has similiar interests in, take a couse at a local college just for fun ex: writing, art, etc. You didn't say if he could return to that work in another city or not. That might be one option. There are many other jobs he could get with his vast skills and experience and he could take some courses at a college to add to his skills and head his vocation in another direction. He could also volunteer to go to schools and talk to children. I would not push him to get a job until he is feeling better about himself and when that time comes, I would suggest a part-time one. Let him know that he has the power to turn a bad turn of events into a positive and meaningful one. He is fortunate to have such a caring and concerned friend like you. Good Luck with your friend and I hope things get better for him.