My husband doesnt want sex anymore. I dont want to if he doesnt. Can marriage survive w/out it? I'm struggling
538279
Intimacy is important, sex is not.  As long as your relationship is loving, caring and affectionate, you will be fine.  Think about older people who are not physically capable of having sex.  Do you think they love each other any less?
1048096
Here's the ugly truth about marriages - he won't want to have sex with you if you don't have his respect. If you just throw yourself at him all the time and tell him how vulnerable you are, etc. he will eventually think you are uninteresting ... unless you are also an amazingly accomplished professional woman who has it all going on at every level. See, we men want and love the woman who is not easily intimidated and requires some effort to impress.\n\nHonest, deep intimacy is a wonderful thing but it can only happen if you start on the journey with mutual respect. A friend told me that the best marriage is a stalemate between equally matched adversaries. Look in the mirror ... tell yourself the truth. Don't be his doormat. You are worth more than that, just find out why you believe me.
36867
It is hell on earth.\n\n1. You live with someone but never have sex\n\n2. You can't, can't, can't just simply walk out the door after a fight. \n\n3. Wives become nags, husbands become lazy slobs\n\n4. Both you and your spouse will end up putting on an extra 50 lbs, just because you can.\n\nIn other words, don't bother. You can still have the sex and the joy of a relationship without complicating your life.
302940
Decreased sex is completely normal in a marriage. It's your responsibility to spice things up in order to keep the passion alive. Try in on the floor, in a public place, use toys, do something taboo, anything new. Continue to give each other compliments especially about each others bodies and what you like about it. Be naughty! It's not just the mans job to keep it going, take the initiative and he will appreciate it I promise!
446670
Sex is a wonderful, and integral part of a marriage. If one party is no longer interested, there IS a reason. Seek counseling and get to the bottom of it!! My (now ex) wife would not, and we had sex 4 times the last 6 months we where together.. Or I should I had sex 4 times, she had it a lot more, so I found out later.. Like I said, something is wrong.. .Depression, cheating, resentments, physical illness, something!
69909
My husband and I have a pretty good sex life. It did go a little down hill when I was pregnant but that was because I didn't want anything. We are still young and have been married for almost 2 years, but we do have a baby and that sometimes changes peoples sex life, but ours is still GREAT!!! I still have that fire that I felt for him the first time we met. He also thinks that I am the most beautiful person in the world because I carried and gave birth to his child. If you want to keep sex in your marriage you have to keep love. I know that we might not have sex 3 times a day like we did when we first started dating, but 3-4 times a week is still very good. Sometimes it is more and when I am working my long weeks it can be less. If you are loosing sex in your marriage just find a way to get that spark back. If you are one of the few that looses your libido during pregnancy don't fret it will come back. I was a complete Nymph before hand so when I didn't want anything we both thought that was strange and I am not a nymph anymore but I STILL WANT TO MAKE LOVE TO MY HUSBAND. I just hope that I can say that in 20 years. Try things like porn or mild fantasies. Or even spice things up by really playing with each other. Just don't give into threesomes or if you are a man do not push them. My husband always wanted one until we met a couple who ended up divorced because of that fantasy. NEVER LET ANYONE ELSE IN YOUR MARRIAGE. That is a sure fire way to kill it. So if you are getting married enjoy the sex but make sure you let each other know when you want it and what makes it more special. Try to keep that spark going. I wish you luck. If you are already married I hope that you still do have that spark. If not try everything to get it back...
1122369
going through that now myself. let's see, arguing daily. no sex. no feeling's of love. he turn's you off. you think of other's alot. and many more thing's. you have to make a choice, do you want to waste your life?
100733
I've been married 6 years and we have sex daily.  It's different for everybody and it really depends on things like your individual sex drives, your energy level, the level of importance you put on sex, your sexual communication, etc.  If you're having an amount of sex that is satisfactory to both of you, then don't worry about what is "normal" and just go with what feels right for the two of you.  If, however, the frequency with which you have sex is not satisfactory to one or the other of you, talk about it.  Find out what the problem is.  Don't just assume that the sex goes away once you get married.  We made that mistake once and we won't make it again.  Best of luck to you and your spouse!
739628
there were obviously problems with your marriage and he left but he misses you. there is sex sex and there is making love sex, after so long he , even though he may not admit it would find it difficult not to have making love sex with you. it all could lead to nothing but it is an intimate bond between you and it may lead to a fuller relationship, if and only if the other issues that caused you to separate are solved.\nat the end of the day your not a 16 years old virgin and being on your own without sex sucks, you dont owe anyone anything about an explanation, you know this may lead to nothing, but your an adult, there is nothing of certainty in the world. it makes you feel good now, if it doesn't then stop, have more sex if you can, the world isn't a very nice place and we have to get what little enjoyment from it that we can.\n\nmost of all the one you dint get tonight is the one you never get\n\nhave fun, we all know where the journey leads so you better enjoy getting there
424076
sounds like you need marriage counseling. i do not understand how the sex can still be great when the emotional connection is gone and you have doubts as to his feelings. marriages grow and change as the twwo of you do. he may need to renegotiate the way yours works and just doesn't know how. it may sound trite but read dr phil relationship rescue it helped a friend of mine. if he won't go to a therepist you should still go yourself to work out how you feel.
915072
Maybe he is having problems preforming and he is insecure about it. I am 20 and my husband is 34 and we have been together for 2 years. Sometimes you still love each other and you still find one another attractive, but you just need a break from the sexual part of the relationship. Are you feeling pressure from the idea of marriage? Are you both stressed out in any way more than usual, maybe from planning a wedding? It all factors in, as long as you still love each other, it's OK. Sex isn't everything.
285081
Just try to do more things together that dont envolve sex, maybe something will spark and ingnite his passion again. It's not an uncommon thing for guys to not want sex that often. Check out www.psychologytoday.com they have a lot of articles about this topic there. good luck to you!
330412
another way for him to express his love is to respect u enough to wait until ur married to have sex.\n\nif he's not willing to wait, then he is only interested in sex and ur better off without him, even if u think u cant survive without him.\n\nu have to ask him is he's willing to wait for u bcos that's the decision u have made. if he;s not willing then u have to move on. there;s no other way around it.\n\ndont get forced into anything u dont want. dont sleep with him just to keep him, bcos if sex is all he wanted he will leave after he gets it.
371935
You married the wrong guy - I have been waiting for you all my life - now what - you just have to give him the boot - work or not if he is not interested in sex and you are newly married - troubles ahead - caution!
1177018
Yes... it's plain and simple....men can't resist temptation or sex. He can love you and still have a need to play. All men go through this and it stinks. You can either divorce him and end up with another man who does you this way too or just work through the crisis and move on with your lives as a married couple. Just because we're married doesn't mean our husbands aren't human. Men aren't women and they just don't think well when all the blood rushes from their brains to their penis. If he doesn't want to leave then don't worry....he wouldn't trade you in for the world. I bet if you were to start dressing up and going out now and then he would become very worried and think about what he's done even more. Either way, don't you dare blame yourself or believe it's your fault for any reason at all. Realize that he's got the problem and don't allow it to consume you. Instead do the reverse and show him exactly what he left at home that is so much better!!!
558311
How about seeing a doctor together and maybe getting a referral to a sex therapist.  There may be some medical solutions.  Even if there isn't, there are a whole host of things that a sex therapist can open up your mind to, that could help bring the spice back into your sex life.  \n\nYou are a very honest person and obviously love your husband.  So, try reaching out with the same question to a professional physician or psychologist who can get you back on the same path together.
193667
I just sat here for several minutes, thinking about how to answer your question...and I can't think of anything other than: I don't think you should get married if you aren't sexually attracted to him. But, there are other factors to consider such as...\n\n1. Is he sexually attracted to you?\n2. Perhaps he's also not as interested in having a sexual marriage? If this is the case, you could marry him with a clear conscience.\n3. Have you even tried sex? (you didn't specify this, so I guess it's a possibility that you simply haven't tried yet)\n4. How have you typically reacted to stressful situations? Maybe you are just a bit (understandably) stressed out with the wedding and things might get back to normal afterwards.\n5. But were you ever sexually attracted to him?\n\nIf you are having doubts and it's this close to the wedding, I'd call it off. I know, I know, impossible to do...but I was having doubts of a similar fashion and I wish I had called mine off. Divorce is even worse.\n\nThere are lots of men out there and each one is very different sexually. How important is it to you? Sex is important in a marriage, but not the most important. On the other hand, it can be VERY important to some people. Are you one of those?\n\nDo take the time to look within yourself. Get above the excitement of the wedding and ask yourself some hard questions. I'm sorry this is happening to you at this time.\nGood luck.