My bestfriend  of 20 years and I love to hang out 3-4x's a week. Should I try to get her to move closer to me?
536791
yes i think so since yall see each other like that.
819915
I am the youngest of three sisters.  Our ages are 36, 42, and 45.  I could not have better friends than them.  We are extremely close and turn to each other for almost anything.  We take weekend girl trips together and call each other for advice.  Two of us live within 20 miles of one another the other lives across the country.  But that doesn't seem to matter.  We always make time for each other.  It wasn't always that way however.  I was the annoying younger sister and the two older sisters rivaled one another.  It wasn't until we were all older adults that we became close.
1045643
My bestfriend and I have known each other since 7th grade, however, we wern't really friends till 11th.  We have had our rough patches, but no matter what is going on we would always be there for one an other.  Recently I needed to borrow a faily large amount of money for a settlement on an old debt.  She let me have the money (my family would not do this for me), since I have paid her back.  I think that people may have bad expirances with so called friends because one trys to take advantage of the other.  We would never do this to each other, it is far more importaint to me that she is always a part of my life.  She has been my bestfriend for 10 years and I don't plan on that ever changing.
1182953
God Bless Her. The idea is to do it in a way which will not hurt her in any way. If this were my problem this afternoon, as I sat down on the sofa, I would reach for a pillow which I would tuck partly under my tailfeathers and which would extend outwards to act as a "spacer" between myself and whomever chose to join me. I would explain, if she moves in regardless, that (you can actually use these same words) "Like Garfield, 'I need my space!'" You can be more determined if you like. You can grab two pillows and put the second one under your arm and elbow. Sooner or later, you will find your words to just ask her politely right out to please move a little further away from you because you need more space to breathe and be comfortable. If she does not understand you, well, you can't actually sit ON her, but that of course would give her an idea of how you feel, wouldn't it? Another answer? Bring that other chair into this room with you and then she can claim the whole sofa and you can chat with her from a distance of about fifteen to eighteen feet, from across the room. There are other answers. Keep reading!  Best to you from G. in South Portland, Maine, U.S.A.
142727
Get involved, get a life.  Don't be so bothered by the fact that you are not hearing from your friend often enough, it seems like she knows your number when she is going through stuff, and loses it when all is going well for her, that to me isn't what friendship is all about.  Maybe if you were to find things to occupy your time and maybe start meeting other people, you may very well come across someone who will treasure you as a friend and have respect for your friendship.
32061
Maybe you are.  You could be the best friend she has without her being the best friend you have.  \nWhy would you want to tell her you're not?  It would be horribly mean, and besides, it's a nice compliment to you that she likes you so much.
64055
I agree totally with ft402003, and I might add that I was just platonic friends with my husband for TEN LONG YEARS before we knew we loved each other.  TEN YEARS!!!!  That is a long time, buddy.  My sister told me once that friends make the best spouses, and I thought YUCK!  But, she was totally right.  When you talk to your "friend", you might tell her to not be afraid to go a step further, and to not be repulsed by it.  Let her know that you are just as afraid as her.  But, whatever you do, don't let her get away.  It is better to tell her how you feel than to keep suffering.  And if she doesn't go for it, then it is HER loss.  Not yours.  HERS.
519581
yes, i think you should make the first move. why let something get away when he was your first. if you don't then why be mad your the one standing back letting her do this. best friends are few and far between and if she'll do this to you then what else will she do. so tell yourself the truth she is not your bestfriend.friends stand beside each other not behind each other.
492684
Ahhh, I`m the same way. You are blessed. Make her your friend. We have been married 35 years and we are best friends. I am so glad for you.. Good luck and God Bless,... {:-)\n\n<><\nHave fun. Life is short.. Be honest with each other and show each other the same respect for each other that you would anyone else..
934949
When we graduated, we didn't see each other every day.  We moved a part, heck, she even lives in another country now.  Yes, we've faded.  But she is still my best friend, and when we do see each other, which is 1 time a year, it's all back to what it use to be.  If you have a strong and wonderful friendship, nothing will break it, even distance.  So in a way, we are stronger, but just geographically farther.
180857
Ther is obviously something going on in her life that is making her act this way. Talk to her. Friendships are the most important things you can have in life and good ones are very hard to come by.\n\nI have had a best friend for 27 yrs and it hasn't all been pretty but each time we found our way back to each other and I am so happy to have her in my life.
321298
as she's ur friend, u may be already sharing some common interests, so take her to places were u had enjpoyed a lot earlier, to remember ur past...
408614
this will hurt but to be honest she isnt any kind of genuine friend if this is how shes treating u. My advice(Coming from a 35 year old scottish chick whos been there b4 with an ex friend),id walk away from her and cut all ties. Do u realy want to be friends with someone that treats u like that? U deserve better babe.xx
768141
I have been in a similiar situation. The "pops" will not stay ur friend forever your best friends WILL! it is okay to hang out with them but not so much that ur best friends r jealous. Mayb try to balance ur time until u find out want u want. U could try having a party with both of them invited and c how it goes. It could work and b fun but b careful.
485400
If you truly value your friendship with her let her go. She is changing and she needs to grow. Unfortunately it may not be in the same direction you are going right now. This happens to a lot of friendships as we get older and mature. She needs to do this for herself right now. Eventually she may come back to being her old self and realize what a wonderful friend she has in you. I went through this myself and for about 5 years was out of touch with 2 of my best friends from school. We are now better friends than we were back in school. Don't take any of this personally, it isn't about you, it is about your friend needing to go in a different direction right now. This is also your time to find other friends too. Don't do or say anything that could jeopardize the friendship you had with her. You both need some space and hopefully in time you will be able to get back what you had before, and it will be even better.
220437
I think it all depends on how close you guys are. just try talkin to her.
293492
No i think that is perfectly fine!!! Well i would think that when me and my better half got together i was 20 and he was 29, 3 years later and we have a awsome strong relationship, i was ready for something serious to plant my feet into and so was he, we had alot of things in common, i mean yes there are times when i think wow hes really been around alot more then i have and i can feel a little bit intimidated, but in the long run im thankfull he has those experiances to help guide our steps, I think he has come to believe that im never going to be perfect, even though i really try to do everything well, im not completely at his level on thinking, he has more life lessons to reflect on, but i dont think its a problem when we both discuss everything and keep the lines of communication open, just like any other relationship, my best friend is in the same boat, her husband is 10 years older then her and oddly enough shes the more responcible one, i dont see why any one would think its wrong, now if you were 25 and she was 15 there might be a huge responce to you sick mo fo lol but i dont think there is anything wrong with you liking her, ask her out, she might be into older guys, and with good reason, guys that are 20-24 are enough to make you want to puke, they only want one thing, they havnt figured out yet theres more to life then a nice set of boobs lol they dont know how to deal with money worth a crap, they only look out for themselfs, where older guys have alot more figured out, theres so many more perks to dating a older guy i could go on forever, more or less your more established at 30... id say go for it :) you have nothing to lose