Anyone else got a typical 15yr old son, left school, no qualifications & thinks he is the big 'I am'. Help?
547097
Yeah if he is the big man that stop supporting him.He will never realize life isn't a walk in the park if you keep enabling him.If your gonna allow him at 15 to not be in school then demand he works,pay rent,utilities,for his own food,clothes and personal hygiene.\nIf not have a great life with the moocher your raised because he will be the only one you have left.
1051590
Ok, I am a gay man. I have no kids of my own, but I have lived with a partner who had children. My partner worked long hours and I took up the role of being the main parent. His children referred to me as their other daddy. I was proud to be this to them. Here is what I advised them.\n\nFirst, any type of fighting or physically violence is wrong. If at all possible teach yourself and your brother to walk away from the fight. If certain bullies persist tell your principles. They have to act upon it. If they do nothing your parents can go to the school board and have it acted upon. If the school board does nothing then you can have the school board, and the parents and the kid in courts. You need to be brave and stand up for you and your brother and your fathers. Be proud of them and who you are. A family.\n\nThey other thing you need to do is continue to talk to your fathers and tell them about your fears. They will listen. If the situation is bad enough, one or both of them will take some sort of action to help you and protect you. If it comes down to moving away then so be it. But running away from a problem has never solved the problem. Be strong, and God will be on your side, for you are in the right here.
407253
It does sound like drugs.  Can't you get him to a better school?  Do something about the bullying : see the headmaster and if possible get a big man to kick some @rse.
371646
I was abused everyday for 11 years out of my 12 by the same boy. (HE wasnt at my school during my tenth year... My best year) anyway He was at my bus stop and it seemed like we had lunch time together every year and he was a grade younger than me. He failed. He would toss stuff at me and my friends, make rumors and signs up about me, pin me to a wall with all his guy friends around watching, and the list is too long to say but when i went for help time after time i was told "oh just let it go" finally i bipassed the principle i was assigned and went to the whole schools Principle which turned out to be a mistake. This kid was on the football team and the Principle was the head football coach and he said to me and i quote "Your just jealose of the attention that football players get, you need to get a hobby, besides he has a tough home life that you probably dont, He is just venting his feelings of aggression." Now i had no care in the world about his home life just because he was being abused didnt give him the right to do it to me. Anyway 4 years after high school i got on a buss to go see my parents because my fiance was working late... I hadnt been picked on since high school and had not heard much about him besides a bad bar fight he had gotten into. well who comes on the buss but him. I immediatly looked down and got fearful and i thought please dont let him notice me. And for my shock he sat down and started talking to me about him going to college and asked me questions of what i had been doing. Talked to me like we were best friends. My mom and dad couldnt believe that i didnt take the oportunity to tell him what he had done to me all those years. The only thing i can think of WHy it happened on my part is that i was heavy and quick to defend my friends. He got a reaction he was looking for
847785
Did you by chance graduate from highschool?  That would explain it.  Standards change once you realize the world is a big place and you don't have to accept a guy that has an attitude you don't like anymore.\n\n***after your update***\nThat also explains it.  You are no longer the guy that can provide more than he is taking.  You are leaving school so no need to try to get anywhere with you, which means they can acknowledge that you are a creep to them.\nYou are gonna find out that entitled attitude of yours is going to serve you very poorly once you get out of highschool and college btw.  You might want to work on making yourself a better person....just some helpful hints if you feel like taking them.
996677
My son was diagnosed as attention deficit and mildy autistic by our public education system in Texas. We were told he would never hold a job, graduate from H.S., and would be institutionalized as an adult. We fought the system continuously, forced them to place him in mainstream classes and to accommodate his learning disabilities, much to the dismay of educators. He graduated last month from college, has had a job for six years and drives a new car he purchased himself. \nIf you are willing to completely dedicate yourself to helping your child , they can overcome this disability, it will not be easy. The public education system would rather label your child and place them in special education. Without a voucher system there is no help available from private specialized programs.
716206
To think of expectations, write a list of attributes you'd like your child to have once he graduates, and how a school can support these things.  Thumb through the dictionary and look up words that describe how you feel-you can also use s thesarus if you'd like to add in a few 'sparkly' words (not too many!).  Have your child come up with a list of what he wants out of school and maybe select the top three to embellish upon.  I couldn't find it now, but there are lists of 'action words' that are suggested for resumes- you can probably use the same list to describe your desires for your child's education.\n\nTo get you started, as a parent, you'd probably like a:\n\nSafe, caring school environment that encourages academic and personal growth.  You might also like a community where parent participation is encouraged and supported by faculty and staff.
754540
This is a tough, but fairly common, issue. Obviously, your administration is either clueless or powerless in this matter. A couple things might work. First, I would call the child's parents and ask to meet with them and the child after school. Explain succinctly and directly what the issue is and how they would like to see the matter resolved. Often, however, a child who behaves like this has issues at home, so that may not work. So, I would try to keep him after school with you to help out in the lab or the classroom in some manner. Give him some responsibilities, which could help boost his confidence a little, and engage him one-on-one in whatever topics interest him during this time. You can subtely approach the issue of his behavior, but not in a forceful way. I find that having that kind of relationship with a student can help manage behavior without having to resort to severe disciplinary measures.
933603
First, you need to calm down.  You cannot change the past - only learn from your mistakes (your failed grades).  Second, I would say maybe put the boyfriend thing on hold.  That can be a huge distraction.  What use is he if you cannot even share your problems with him?  He is probably sucking a lot of energy & emotion out of you & you don't need that.  You are too young.  Try to stay focuse on your goals - to continue getting good grades & yes, to make your parents proud.  They are paying for your education and that is no small responsibility.  Don't stay away from home -  you need to be around your family.  You need to make peace with them & get over the bad feelings before they grow and get worse.  Don't punish your little brother because you don't want to deal with your parents.  That is silly.  Not going to his swim meet is a choice that you have made (b/c ur mad at your parents??) so don't blame your parents for that!  Go home, tell them you are sorry for letting them down.  Ask for an opportunity to explain the situation & ask them to forgive you.  Tell them you feel overwhelmed & that you will continue to work hard.  That is all parents want to hear - you taking responsibility, not making excuses & not placing blame.\n\nWhen you feel so overwhelmed & don't know where to turn - pray and ask God for help & for direction.  He answers prayers.
117415
yeah, i can help.  i can help you be a better parent by giving you some advice:  don't do your son's homework for him.  you are sending him to school to learn, aren't you?  how is he going to ever learn how to do anything if you spend days doing his work for him?  \n\nsure, he might end up with an A in first grade, but who cares about what you got in first grade?  you could make an argument that grades are important to his future if they are high school grades, but it's far more important that he actually *learn* things at this age.\n\nsheesh.
271928
He can get into most colleges and universities with a GED, but that's not the only issue of concern for him (and you). What does he intend to do in lieu of attending classes? Does he have a job? Is he interested in going to college later on? How is his social development? Will he be completely cut off from his peer group when he drops out of high school or does he have a wide circle of friends outside of school? These are some questions you should both consider carefully, but it's your life (and his) and your decision to make. I hope it works out for both of you.
373505
Your son will succeed in life with or without the TAG program, not because of his great intellect but because of his great heart. Let him follow his heart. The world is full of opportunities for him to cultivate his mind, but let him do it on his own terms. You have a son who loves his sister and is patient and kind. He appreciates his friends and doesn't aspire right now to move away from them and set himself apart. Even if he stays in regular classes now, by the time he gets to middle and high school, he will automatically start moving away from some of his classmates, as he discovers that he easily grasps abstract concepts that other kids struggle with. The patience he has learned from helping his sister will help him in dealing with the differences he discovers between the way his mind works and the way most other minds work. At this point, if he is not bored in school and he is happy with his life, why pull him out? Let him develop his own enrichment program based on his own passions and interests. He will do just fine. He sounds like he has wisdom, which is far more important than mere intelligence. He has already told you what is the right thing for him.
200242
Have to police or the courts order him to leave.  He need to learn to stand on his own two feet.  He might just need a wake up call.  Give him a bus pass for him to get around.  There should be a way for him to get his own grants and loans.  Tell him to either help around the house, get a job and get out.  I lnow this is a very hard thing to do as a parent but it is time for him to find his wings.  There are a lot of adults who get loans to goto school.  Tell him it is time to wake up and smell the coffee.
298542
hi Karon.....  my advice......find out who the lad  is, then go up to him and  introduce yourself as such snd such's mum and  you  heard  that he liked  younger  children to play  with....suggests  that  he  goes  and plays with lads of his  own age or  you'll come and  speak to him again....speak to him in a  way thats  slightly intimidating ...dont issue direct threats as he will play on this...  but  do it in such a  way that he'll suss  what  you mean ...if  he  plays  up  with your nice chat, then invite him round to your  house where he  can play nicely ....  failing  that .....  go  and speak to  your lads teacher ( i take it this is  happening  in and around  school) and  say  you want something done  about  it.... if that doesnt work ...  make an appointment  to see the head  and ask for the schools anti bullying policy to be explained and then  explain about whats happening to your  son .. ....  if  all this  fails to  produce results  in a  couple  of  weeks ... take  it  to the local education authority .\ngood  luck
87378
Try his classmates. There's bound to be one who's nice enough to help him. Also, YOU could try doing it.
156377
!st, quit thinking of him as a moron.  I have an MA in SPEC ED, and you ned to change your attitude. By moron, do you mean low IQ or am attitude problem? If low IQ, there are teachers trained for this. If you mean attitude, he'll have to learn by his own mistakes.
990371
Academics...a different breed of human.  You're speaking a completely different language when you're talking with them.\n  \nI had similar experiences with middle school teachers and my kids.  Their children were the spawn of God, perfect in every way.  The fact that "Dad" is principle of the school system is even more reason for them to feel invincible.  You have your battle cut out for you.\n\nIf there is a contact at the school that you are most comfortable with, I would try to discuss this with them.  I do think that "kids will be kids" but obviously you aren't dealing with a normal kid, but the "golden child" of Mr. Principal.  None the less, you deserve equal consideration and should try to work out the best solution for the kids well-being at school.  \n\nAs I see it,  the boy was clearly wrong for viewing your daughter's report card and then talking about it (let alone lying), and they were both at fault for name-calling.  If this doesn't get amicably resolved soon, they could both be given suspensions.  \n\nChances are, the "friendship" is history, at least for a while, and the goal is to try to salvage your, and their, dignity.  Sometimes this requires eating some humble pie, and allowing the "lunatic" mom a little extra self-righteousness.  I see it as a losing battle to try to tell her that her son has done anything wrong.  Though she won't see it now, she will probably find out eventually anyway. \n \nSorry to ramble so.  I wish you the best of luck.  You will need it.