What is the best mama joke?
544637
Yo mamas so fat when she was born she fed her mom breast milk\n\nYo mamas so stupid she pays for free samples\n\nYo mama so fat she went to the movies and sat next to everyone\n\nYo mamas so fat she when she bends down, she rolls miles and makes people pancakes
454784
your mama so old, her birthday expired.\n\nyou are so dumb, you jumped out of the window and went up.\n\nyour mama so black, she leaves fingerprints on charcoal.\n\nyour glasses so thick, you look at a map and see people waving.\n\nyour mama so fat, she got on a scale and it said to be continued\n\nthere are so many, i can not remember them all \n\n      have some fun w/ these.
929334
i hope this joke can make you laugh\n\nA little boy walks into his parents' room to see his mom on top of his dad bouncing up and down. The mom sees her son and quickly dismounts, worried about what her son has seen. She dresses quickly and goes to find him.\nThe son sees his mom and asks, "What were you and Dad doing?"\n\nThe mother replies "Well you know your dad has a big tummy and sometimes I have to get on top of it to help flatten it."\n\n"You're wasting your time, " said the boy.\n\n"Why is that?" asked his mom, puzzled.\n\n"Well when you go shopping the lady next door comes over and gets on her knees and blows it right back up."
330597
Yo momma so dirty she has to creep up on bathwater. \nYo momma so greasy she sweats Crisco! \nYo momma so greasy Texaco buys Oil from her \nYo momma teeth are so yellow traffic slows down when she smiles! \nYo momma teeth are so yellow she spits butter! \nYo momma teeth are so yellow I can't believe its not butter \nYo momma so lazy she thinks a two-income family is where yo daddy has two jobs. \n Yo momma so skinny she has to wear a belt with spandex. \nYo momma so skinny she turned sideways and dissapeared. \nYo momma house so small she has to go outside to eat a large pizza. \nYo momma house so small you have to go outside to change your mind. \nYo momma house so dirty roaches ride around on dune buggies! \nYo momma house so dirty she has to wipe her feet before she goes outside. \nYOUR MAMA SO FAT WHEN SHE WENT ON THE SCALE IT SAID TO BE CONTINUED!\n\nYOUR MAMA SO FAT EVERY TIME  SHE TURNS AROUND ITS HER BIRTHDAY!\n\nYOUR MAMA IS SO FAT YOU NEED A ROAD MAP TO FIND YOUR WAY AROUND HER!\n\n\nYOUR MAMA IS SO FAT, PEOPLE CAME AND STARTED PLAYING TWISTER ON HER POLKA DOT DRESS.\n\nYOUR MAMA IS SO FAT, SHE FELL IN LOVE AND BROKE IT.
1006859
yo mama is so skinny, i went to give her a hug and i split in half\n\n\nyo mama's breathe is soooo nasty, her teeth packed up and left.\n\n\nyo mama is sooo fat, she went swimmin in the ocean and shamu was singing "We are fam-i-ly!"\n\n\nYo mama is soooo dumn, i told her to turn the tv on so she starts rubbing her boobies and lickin her lips!!
520617
1.Yo mama so STUPID when your dad said it was chilli outside, she ran outside with a bowl and spoon!\n\n2. Yo mama so ugly that when she joined an ugly competion, they said, sorry, no professionals!
918830
LMAO  That one is too funny.\n\n\nA little blind girl goes up to her mum and says, "Mummy, mummy, when will I be able to see?" \nHer mum replies "I'll tell you what, I'll take you to the chemist and get you some special cream for your eyes and you will be able to see in the morning." \nSo off they went to the chemist, got the cream, and went home, all the while the little girl was getting more and more excited at the prospect of being able to see again. Once they got home, the mother put the cream on the little girls eyes, wrapped a bandage around her head, and took her to bed. \nThe following morning the little girl stumbled into her mums bedroom and excitedly shouted "Quick mummy, take off the bandage so that i will be able to see again." \nSo the mother slowly took of all the bandages, taking her time, and all the while the little girl was getting more and more excited. Once they were off the little girl said "But mummy, I still can't see." \nTo which the mother replied, "April fool!"
849770
Giggle (small one). I've heard it before but we need more clean jokes like that :)
395871
Yo mamma is so stupid she got hit by a parked car.\n\nYo mamma is so fat she sat on a rainbow and skittles popped out.
226788
Fresh from her shower, a woman stands in front of the mirror complaining to her husband that her breasts are too small.\n\nInstead of characteristically telling her it's not so, the husband uncharacteristically comes up with a suggestion. "If you want your breasts to grow, then every day take a piece of toilet paper and rub it between your breasts for a few seconds."\n\nWilling to try anything, the wife fetches a piece of toilet paper and stands in front of the mirror, rubbing it between her breasts.\n\n"How long will this take?" she asks.\n\n"They'll grow larger over a period of years," he replies.\n\nThe wife stops. "Why do you think rubbing a piece of toilet paper between my breasts everyday will make my breasts grow over the years?"\n\n"Worked for your butt, didn't it?"\n\nHe lived. And with a great deal of therapy, may even walk again..\n\n\nMan driving down road.\nWoman driving up same road\nThey pass each other\nWoman yells out her window, "PIG!"\nMan yells out his window, "B.I.T.C.H!"\nMan rounds next curve\nCrashes into a huge pig in middle of road.\n\nThought For The Day : If only men would listen. \n\nHEHE>>HAVE FUN 2 YA GUYZ READING
624878
Ask yo mama !!! lol !!!
375363
Yo mama is so fat\nYo mama so fat when her beeper goes off, people thought she was backing up\n\nYo mama so fat her nickname is "Lardo"\n\nYo mama so fat she eats Wheat Thicks.\n\nYo mama so fat were in her right now\n\nYo mama so fat people jog around her for exercise\n\nYo mama so fat she went to the movies and sat next to everyone\n\nYo mama so fat she has been declared a natural habitat for Condors\n\nYo mamma so fat you haveta roll over twice to get off her...\n\nYo mama so fat she was floating in the ocean and spain claimed her for then new world\n\nYo mama so fat she lay on the beach and people run around yelling Free Willy\n\nYo mama so fat when you get on top of her your ears pop!\n\nYo mama so fat when she has wants someone to shake her hand, she has to give directions!\n\nYo mama so fat she goes to a resturant, looks at the menu and says "okay!"\n\nYo mama so fat when she wears a yellow raincoat, people said "Taxi!"\n\nYo mama so fat she had to go to Sea World to get baptized\n\nYo mama so fat she got to iron her pants on the driveway\n\nYo mama so fat she put on her lipstick with a paint-roller\n\nYo mama so fat she got to pull down her pants to get into her pockets\n\nYo mama so fat when she tripped over on 4th Ave, she landed on 12th\n\nYo mama so fat when she bungee jumps, she brings down the bridge too\n\nYo mama so fat the highway patrol made her wear "Caution! Wide Turn"\n\nYo mama so fat when she sits around the house, she SITS AROUND THE HOUSE!\n\nYo mama so fat when she steps on a scale, it read "one at a time, please"\n\nYo mama so fat when she sits on my face I can't hear the stereo.\n\nYo mama so fat she fell in love and broke it.\n\nYo mama so fat when she gets on the scale it says to be continued.\n\nYo mama so fat when she gets on the scale it says we don't do livestock.\n\nYo mama so fat her neck looks like a pair of hot dogs!\n\nYo mama so fat she's got her own area code!\n\nYo mama so fat she looks like she's smuggling a Volkswagon!\n\nYo mama so fat God couldn't light Earth until she moved!\n\nYo mama so fat NASA has to orbit a satellite around her!\n\nYo mama so fat whenever she goes to the beach the tide comes in!\n\nYo mama so fat when she plays hopscotch, she goes New York, L.A., Chicago...\n\nYo mama so fat she's got Amtrak written on her leg.\n\nYo mama so fat even Bill Gates couldn't pay for her liposuction!\n\nYo mama so fat her legs is like spoiled milk - white & chunky!\n\nYo mama so fat I had to take a train and two buses just to get on the her good side!\n\nYo mama so fat she wakes up in sections!\n\nYo mama so fat when she goes to an amusement park, people try to ride HER!\n\nYo mama so fat she sat on a quarter and a booger shot out of george washington's nose.\n\nYo mama so fat she rolled over 4 quarters and it made a dollar!\n\nYo mama so fat when she lies on the beach no one else gets sun!\n\nYo mama so fat when she bunje jumps she goes straight to hell!\n\nYo mama so fat when she jumps up in the air she gets stuck!!!\n\nYo mama so fat she's got more Chins than a Hong Kong phone book!\n\nYo mama so fat that her senior pictures had to be arial views!\n\nYo mama so fat she's on both sides of the family!\n\nYo mama so fat everytime she walks in high heels, she strikes oil!\n\nYo mama so fat she fell and made the Grand Canyon!\n\nYo mama so fat she sat on the beach and Greenpeace threw her in!\n\nYo mama so fat even her clothes have stretch marks!\n\nYo mama so fat she has a wooden leg with a kickstand!\n\nYo mama so fat she has to use a VCR as a beeper!\n\nYo mama so fat she broke her leg, and gravy poured out!\n\nYo mama so fat when she rides in a hot air balloon, it looks like she's wearin tights!\n\nYo mama so fat she got hit by a parked car! \n\nYo mama so fat they have to grease the bath tub to get her out!\n\nYo mama so fat she has a run in her blue-jeans!\n\nYo mama so fat when she ge
325692
A girl came skipping home FROM school one day. "Mommy, Mommy," sheyelled,\n"we were counting today, and all the other kids could only count to four, but I counted to 10. See? 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6,7, 8, 9, 10!"\n"Very good," said her mother.\n"Is it because I'm blonde, Mommy?"\n"Yes, Honey, it's because you're blonde."\nThe next day the girl came skipping home FROM school. "Mommy, Mommy," She yelled, "we were saying the alphabet today, and all the other kids\ncould only say it to D, but I said it to G. See? A,b, c, d, e, f, g!"\n"Very good," said her mother.\n"Is it because I'm blonde, Mommy?"\n"Yes, Honey, it's because you're blonde."\nThe next day the girl came skipping home FROM school. "Mommy, Mommy," she yelled, "we were in gym class today, and when we showered, all the other girls had flat chests, but I have these!" And she lifted her tank top\nto reveal a pair of 36Cs.\n"Very good," said her embarrassed mother.\n"Is it because I'm blonde, mommy?"\n"No, Honey, it's because you're 25"\n \n \n(hint: The girl is Pamela Anderson)
1122666
oh cool! It was my mum's birthday today as well! HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!!!  here's a joke....\nLil' Johnny goes to his dad and asks, "What is politics?" Dad says, "Well son, let me try to explain it this way. I'm the breadwinner of the family, so let's call me Capitalism. Mommy is the administrator of the money, so we'll call her the Government. We're here to take care of your needs, so we'll call you The People. The nanny, well, consider her The Working Class. Your baby brother, we'll call him The Future. Now go think about this and see if it makes sense."\n\nSo the little boy goes off to bed thinking about what Dad has said. Later that night, he hears his baby brother crying and runs to his room only to find that his diapers are very soiled. So the little boy goes to his parents' room. Mom is sound asleep. Not wanting to wake her, he goes to the nanny's room. Finding the door locked, he looks through the peephole and sees his father in bed with the nanny. He gives up and goes back to bed.\n\nThe next morning, the little boy says to his father, "Dad, I think I understand what politics is now."\n\n"Good son, tell me in your own words then what politics are."\n\nThe little boy replies, "Well, while Capitalism is screwing the Working Class, the Government is sound asleep, the People are being ignored and the Future is in deep sh it."
658454
Yo mama so stupid she got locked in a grocery store and starved!\nYo mama so stupid she sold her car for gasoline money\nYo mama so stupid she sits on the TV, and watches the couch!
808612
My mama!!\n\nFor real!\n\nOr Vic Carucci's  but if Vic ask my mama, he'll agree too!\n\nIt's yo mamma kid!
624181
Yo momma is so fat that when she sat on a rainbow, skittles popped out.\n\nYo momma is so fat that when she was wearing a yellow, rain coat someone yelled taxi.\n\nYo momma is so fat, she stands in two different time zones.\n\nYo momma is so fat that she got stuck in the Grand Canyon.