Why most people encouraging divorce & despise and blame those mistresses or 2nd wife?
548089
Exactly - if you give them the chance they will. Just as if our husband or partner doesnt give us the attention we need, we look elsewhere for the comfort and support. Its human nature to be wanted. Everything happens for a reason and ya cant fight fate.
986425
Its because we live in a society that was founded and is guided by nothing but men assuming father figure roles in our lives. Therefore, if a woman knowingly has an affair with a married man, she is assumed by society to be of low moral character.\nIts romanticized in movies, books, music, you name it infidelity is America's new fast food craze.\nI am of the belief, however, that open and honest communication should guide relationships. If there's a communication breakdown and either a husband or a wife have extra marital affairs without trying to heal the problems in their relationship, not only is the person from the outside of the marriage of low moral character, be they male or female, but also the person IN the marriage has a few problems as well.\nIf you've pledged yourself to another person, loved them, become their breath when they need air, you should NEVER give up on loving them, and always try to work towards a stronger relationship of trust and mutual love and understanding.\nIts a shame that we groom ourselves to just have physical connections with people we find attractive, instead of truly finding someone who can become a life long friend and partner to share everything in our lives with.
224829
They choose bad lawyers.\nThat isn't true maybe you feel that way  but "always" is a strong term.\nWhen a marriage ends both people are "screwed" out of the future they planned .the one that was to last a life time shared.\nGL\nDon't worry about losing.  If it is right, it happens - The Main thing is not to hurry.  Nothing good gets away.  ~John Steinbeck, 10 November 1958\n\nWhat is the opposite of two?  A lonely me, a lonely you.  ~Richard Wilbur
946487
People all to often enter into marriage for all the wrong reasons. Half of those getting married look at it as entering a new world but they fail to see all the baggage you take with you.  Too many want to get from marriage and are not willing to give.  Bringing fantasies into marriage only dooms it. To prevent so many divorces I think everyone should live together for at least a year before getting married. They should plan the future they want away from the mate and then compare the plans. \nIf they are really mature they should include a plan for ending the marriage if times get to unmanageable. Instead of looking at that as a negative it should be a positive.  Very few people ever recognize dangers of marriage and even fewer have the guts to plan for the possible separation.
299629
Because they seem to like the challenge.Because some women allow them to cheat.My father use to say that sometimes a man will marry the woman that will let him get away with the most crap.Whorish men get married too.Some men are in the practice of saying whatever it takes to get what they want or to get you off of their backs.Never let him know that you are totally satisfied with him or your relationship,because to do so is to give up the fight.Have you ever seen a dog chase a car?If the car stops moving he turns and goes the other way.He doesn't really want to catch it,he just enjoys the chase.Always keep your man chasing you.Even if he has you,don't convince him that he does.Otherwise he will look for some other person to chase.
158599
They started as lies to their previous spouse, an affair.\n\nClose relationships depend on radical honesty, and affairs are built on deceit.\n\nWhen the fantasy world is exposed to the day to day issues that couples deal with during marriage, it crumbles and the two partners now have to realize that they didn't learn a thing in their last marriage, that it wasn't their partner that made their marriage "bad" but how they responded to the daily issues of living with and deciding to love another.\n\nInstead of learning the skill of loving another, these folks bailed out when the road got tough, trying to put all the blame on their betrayed spouse, only to find out that it wasn't a new spouse they needed, but better skills.
146085
The only dumb question is the one you don't ask.  But you're absolutely right.  Divorce is a very sad but true fact of life in today's society.\n\nThe underlying reason is probably how materialistic and selfish this society has become.  It is no longer "I need to do my part and be patient", instead it's "What have you done for me lately".  \n\nPart of it maybe the fact that men and women communicate differently.  But that's always been the case throughout history.\n\nThe other part of it is permiscuity.  Statistically, 80% of divorces are because of infidelity.  The reason this has become so is directly attributable to pre-marital sex.  People will continue to deny this, but the statistics are very clear.\n\nThink about it from a psychological point of view.  Once the heart is broken (i.e. after one's first love), it can never be put back to it's original state.  The emotional scar may heal, but it will never disappear.  This creates mistrust between the sexes.  Ultimately, people get numbed to it and it becomes a predatory game.\n\nAlso, after leaving the first partner, one becomes very curious about all potential partners.  Whereas if intimacy is saved for the institution of marriage, then the partners learn how to fully satisfy each other without any temptation from outside the marriage.\n\nThe problem only gets worse with every generation.  Once a child grows up in an environment that does not hold marriage sacred, then they will end up taking it even a step further.\n\nWe all have to learn to "love the one you're with".  No one is perfect.  Instead of listening to that little voice in your head that nags you about how annoying your partner's habbits are, learn to love those habbits.  They are what makes your partner who they are.  \n\nWe have to learn to appreciate the good and the bad.  After all, it is for better or for worse.\n\nAnd God only knows best.
1002269
there are many motives behind an affair,the old line it just happened is a crock of bull,it is given much thought and for men i think it's a challenge for women it is a emotional thing the sense of being needed, attractive to another man.men also need to see if they still have it some do, some don't,  some never did,regardless of the reason it is wrong.if your sex life stinks make it better try different things,being a women i can't completly answer why guys cheat but i feel it's an ego thing or maybe their spouse is truely a louse in which case she has no reason to complain we women know men like / need  sex and if we are completly against making love then let him go no man or women should be forced to live without it unless it is for a medical reason,in that case then you should find other ways to satisfy each other.
271546
:}\nGod hates divorce\ndivorce except ror the cause of adultry is itself adultry\n\nFaith affects decisions regarding divorce.
510577
Because you know it's wrong.  They is NOTHING wrong with desiring another, the wrong is in acting.  Respect for your wife, respect for yourself, love of your home/car/belongings should help too.  Get away from her if you can, find a way to turn this off, and for the love of god don't tell your wife.  Good Luck.
242023
Maybe it's because they've never been taught about the consequences.. i mean, so far all i've heard is how we shouldn't stop two people who loved each other from marrying, even if they're the same gender. Or, the relationship is ethically wrong. A majority of people aren't taught about the dangers of it. I don't support this kind of marriage also.. because i was brought up knowing that it ruins the marriage institution (between a man and a woman) and etc. Maybe what you said could come true, but it will take years before others  to open their eyes and see what has happened.
794609
Generally, infidelity is grounds for reducing, if not eliminating, alimony.  You have to be able (and willing) to prove it.
445049
I guess because it departs from tradition and what people are used to.  The women's movement was only 30-40 years ago, and a lot of people still aren't conditioned to the fact that a woman can find happiness and success on her own.  I am 27, rather attractive, own a business and make more money than most married couples my age, yet some people treat me like I've got one foot in the grave and had better hurry up and get married because 30 seems to be the magic deadline.  The truth is, I would love to get married when I'm damn good and ready to find the right one, whether it be tomorrow or when I'm 75.  I'm just not going to get married for the sake of marriage, which a lot of people seem to do (hence the divorce rate today).
993897
The main problem I see is selfishness in relationships.  The woman tearing the man down because He won't give her what she wants. The man treating her as a sex object because that's what He wants.\n\nRecently I've learned a lot about men and their desires from talking to them, going to seminars, and from books like "The Five Love Languages" and "How to Affair Proof Your Marriage" and the conclusion I've come to is that we're selfish.  If men and women would learn to give each other what they need then we'd be a lot better off.
1062926
Because their marriages fail because they are just publicity stunts so they can get more roles in movies and tv shows. Maybe some marriages are real, but they fail because of the tabloids lying about affairs and babies and gay people, and that is not funny.
1070796
I haven't the answer to your question, but something else that has helped others who found themselves in the shoes you find yourself wearing now ...\n\n... When a Mate is Unfaithful : \n... Infidelity - Its Tragic Consequences \n... Is Reconciliation Possible? \n... The Option of Divorce \n... Meaningful Support \n... Why Some Stay Together \n... Who Is Responsible? \n... Does God Hate All Divorce? \nhttp://www.watchtower.org/library/g/1999/4/22/article_01.htm
521311
Because they think the wedding is all-important, but forget that the marriage is the collection of days following the wedding. Too few couples plan for *that.*\n\nIs it any shock to know that so many marriages end in divorce?