my mother-in-law gets on my nerves?
442060
Do you know that 7 in 10 women do NOT get along with their mother-in-laws?\n\nI'm also one of that 7...it doesn't get easier but there are ways of dealing with them.\n\nGo buy "Toxic In-Laws" by Susan Forward, it helped me understand & deal my MIL & FIL better...they can't be "fixed" nor will they change.\n\nThere are also several other books out there dealing with this topic...just look up "Toxic Inlaws" on Amazon.
748209
Remember this is your battle with the inlaws not your sister in law's.  Do not make her choose sides.  Be happy for her that she has a better relationship with them than you do because I'm sure you wouldn't wish what you are going through on another.  Maturity is called for here.  Stick to your guns for yourself, don't expect other's to choose sides.  She sounds like she's attempting to be neutral.  If you don't like hearing about what's going on with them, simply ask her not to go into detail about them or what they do or don't do.  Keep your friendship.  That's more important than allowing the in laws to drive a wedge between you two...and likely, that's what's happening.
705815
Typical mother in law... do what I did, my house, my rules, she don't like it theres the door!
942502
I wouldnt worry about it if I where you althought it might make you furious let her think what she wants it's that type of gossip that might fill her less than fulfilling days so in fact your doing the old lady a favour by giving her something to do, Just as long as you and your hubby are straight in understanding the situation then every thing is cool cause at the end of the day he is your real family,under your roof in your bed is what matters the most of what is though of you.
960233
I try to keep my mother in law out of my relationship as much as possible,
908144
Catch her putting in a camera on one of your own.  Then , send the tape to all your husband's relatives.  Once people know that others know, they usually drop their invasion of you and your life.  It's like the dirty little secret is out.\n\nNow, there is another problem here -- you are really upset and feel invaded by this.  Since your husband is so unresponsive, can you see a counselor?  You need to work out your feelings, since in the end she is still your mother-in-law and the grandmother to your child -- and will be forever, no matter if a divorce occurs, etc.  \n\nNaturally, your mother-in-law is sick and needs help.  I'm hoping other family members will realize the extent to which she is sick and will intervene.  I'm also hoping others will help your husband see reality.  As often happens, there are plenty of folks who put up with bad behavior, to the point of denying its existence, because the love and feel loyalty to that person.  It's called cooperating with the illness.  You need to walk a simple line ... without being critical and judgemental, state repeatedly that she is sick and needs help, that this is not the behavior of a rational adult, that there is free counseling through the church, etc.  What you are trying to do by this is get people to agree with you, so it's not a case of choose a side.  Instead, you are asking them to choose to help her.\n\nGood luck -- I feel for you and wish I had better advice for how to handle this.
877543
Relationships with in-laws can be so difficult.  I know it is none of my business, but why in the world are you living with them?!!!  It would be really nice if you and your husband could have a place of your own to live.  It would not fix all the problems, but it would certainly help out a lot.  You and your husband need to stand together whenever you confront your in-laws.  Maybe your husband needs to do the talking for both of you so they will know that you both agree with what you are confronting them about.  It will be difficult for your in-laws to accept that you and your husband are one now and that they should not interfere in your marriage.  And what is the deal with them not letting you two open your own bank account?  Aren't you adults?  Don't you have your own money?  Why is it any of their business?  Why is your husband letting them control the 2 of you?  Is he having issues "letting go of mommy's apron strings" or something?  \n\nI would suggest that you both see a family/marriage counselor and ask him to help you find a way to deal with your in-laws.  I have a similar problem with my in-laws which almost broke up our marriage, and our couselor suggested that my husband and I confront them together in a loving manner.  He said that if they still refuse to respect me and refuse to change the way they treat us, we need to stop being around them.  In my opinion, you and your husband need to make a decision to put your marriage first if you want it to survive, and do not let anything or anyone come between you.  Find a way to move out.  I'm assuming it is their house since your mother-in-law has removed your belongings from the rest of the house.  You and your husband need to put some distance between yourselves and his parents.  He needs to let them know that he has a family and responsibility of his own now that they cannot interfere with.\n\nAs for how to deal...  That is so difficult.  Continually forgive them for the things they do.  Don't hold on to grudges.  Don't let anger eat away at you or turn into hatred.  It will ruin your health, your marriage, and your whole life.  Continue to stand up for yourself and for your marriage.  And also remember that when you have a child, things are most likely going to get worse with your in-laws, so be prepared.  I wish you the best and hope that you can find your own place to live and maybe a family counselor as well.
577123
She's rude! If you're married to her son- your family! As for the kids, the noise or mess may bother her, but that is still no excuse.\nTry talking to your husband, he can speak to her on your behalf.
681020
oh boy. sounds like me and my mom. I just walked away when she started to irritate me. Don't acknowledge her bad behaviour at all. But don't expect her to stop being this way. you will have to deal with it for the rest of her life. So just try and tell yourself that you will leave the house one day and you won't have to deal with her. Just try and remember to not fight back. Let her win. Even if your beyond right. Because she's only looking to argue. not win an argument. Ignore her critcisms of other people and just try to tune her out when she talks. That's your best bet. GOOD LUCK
17284
Well if you are invited is acceptable to go, and the party is not for your sister in law it is for your mother in law and i think your mother in law is the one you are honoring when you go. If she is nasty to you just turn the other cheek, and explain to your children that you are going for your m-i-l and not take anything that your sister in law says to you to heart. She might be jealous of your relationship with your m-i-l. In the end it will all smooth over, trust me from a person who knows.
148006
my grandma...she gets mad
1121860
I went through that stage too. I dont really know how to explain it lol. I just grew out of it. Sometimes she still gets on my nerves lol. Moms like to be nosey and ask random questions and I think sometimes I was just like seriously leave me alone lol. Try to be patient. She loves you!
865717
Remember that mother in laws had mother in laws too.  If you get along with your mother in law, then just act normal, have fun and allow her to make the main decisions; it is of course her kitchen.  Accept her suggestions with grace and all should be fine.  If she loves to cook, she already knows what has to be done, so ask her when you get there, what she would like you to cook - whether its the potatoes, cranberries, etc.  And if you are not sure how to cook them, ask her, make her the center of the cooking and don't try to make it a competition.  Good luck
870134
lol, just ignore her. Who knows what is going through her head. She's old with wrinkles and probably sees you as a beauitful young woman and is jealous. If she says anything to you tell her you're not interested in her husband then smile and thank her for asking.
1170233
I ignore her.  My hubby wants to go to church with her, sometimes I go, sometimes I don't.  If she flips me any shit, I let her know in my own way not to even go there, so she doesn't anymore.  I have a tendancy to get really evil and wicked with my words without raising my voice or cussing when I am provoked.  That and I think about the fact that she won't be around forever.  Talk to her and your husband and hopefully it will get better.  Hang in there...  She really won't be around forever, ya know.
829206
your husband is the one that needs to put his foot down! tell him what is going on..and that you would NEVER put up with this kind of behavior if it were your own mother/sister. \nyou married him, not his mother...yes she is part of your family but she doesn't and shouldn't have a say in YOUR life together. \nhonestly i would look to move away! * that's what i encouraged my husband to do when we got married. we moved my mother in law to Hawaii! * \nif your hubby won't put his foot down then your going to be the one to say something. it may be hard, but YOUR HIS WIFE! that car you borrowed is YOURS as much as it is your husbands...you need to stand up for yourself.\nbe firm but cordial, and tell her that you understand that she loves her son very very much, but so do you. and you are his wife. \nhe is a grown man, and you two want her to be part of your life, but you don't want her controlling it. tell her that you feel like she doesn't like you, and that your trying your best to be a good wife to her son. but you will NOT let her make you feel guilty about the decisions that you make together as a couple. ask her how she would feel if HER mother in law butted in the way she did? \n\nperhaps talking w/your father in law might help? or a brother in law?
875777
"meaner than a snake." That's funny! I sympathize with your situation.  I sure wouldn't want to go there. What's the worst thing that could happen if you take a strong stance with your husband and tell him that you don't want to go this year?  Why not invite the old coot to your home? Or just skip going to the relatives this year and celebrate the holidays with your husband and children.\nAlso, I would have a problem with a mother-in-law who doesn't have anything nice to say about you or your son and the fact that your husband let's her get away with that nastyness. You don't deserve to be treated like that.