how do I learn to think for myself? and gain confidence?
453915
I remember being 19 and not feeling confident.  That's okay, the confdence will develop as you mature.  Stay focused on the positive aspects of your life and continue to reach for your goals and dreams.  Be patient with yourself.  You sound like an intelligent person who will end up on her feet.
477018
Do things that you know you are good at, each time you succeed, YOU WILL FEEL BETTER ABOUT YOURSELF.  You will start to feel confidence and competence. You will soon find a way to transfer that feeling to things that you are new at. You just did something that required self confidence, asking a million strangers a personal question like that is not easy, you are on your way.
102671
What is your fear which stole your confidence away? Talk about it... speak to someone if you have a person whom you trust. \n\nIf you don't have anyone to speak to, try self help technique. you can write in your diary or record your voice as you talk about it. Then read what you wrote or replay what you've recorded and hear it as though it was your friend who wrote/ spoke.\n\nMost of the time we know the solution to our problem, but being in the hole ourselves, we fail to see the bigger picture and feel really helpless and stuck. The irony is when someone came to us with their problem, we can immediately see the solution. Therefore, by using this technique you can be your own "friend" and help yourself out of it. \n\nIf none of the above helps, list down your achievement in life, something you feel good/ proud about yourself, happy moments. Then try to recall/ visualise those moments. You will feel better.
351237
Just give it to him, Show him your ""self confidence"" and he'll think good thoughts about you.. I promise!!
907237
You just need to boost your own self confidence a bit. Think to yourself that you are more then worthy and the best thing out there. When you believe this there will be no problem.
389304
Start giving yourself Brownie points for every good choice you make. Confidence and self-esteem are earned, nobody is born just possessing them. Every time you make someone smile, remind yourself that you have that ability. Do your work honestly and well. Treat people the way you want to be treated. Give others sincere compliments and don't always expect others to set your standards of decency or to make you happy. Remember, you're not transparent. People can't tell how you're feeling. Eventually, feeling confident will become second nature. But above all, be kind to yourself and others. And just have fun!
519423
Beleive in yourself. Make your own decision. Trust yourself. Love yourself. Be proud of yourself and decisions you have made (Specially the right decisions). Learn from your mistakes and improve your shortfalls. Listen to others and learn from their experiences. Know that you are as capable as others. Everyone makes mistakes, it is the one who learns from it that rises higher in life.
480816
Simply believe in yourself. You could do anything just as good or better than any other person, if you really wanted to.\n\nTake TV commercials for example, you've seen some pretty stupid ones before, right? And you probably thought, "I could do a better job than that!"\nAnd more than likely, you could!!\nAnd so it is, with most everything.
875877
I have a few suggestions on overcoming your problems.\n\nYou need to love yourself for the person you are, tell yourself daily that you are strong and confident (preferably when you feel the least). Everyone is unique. Everyone is different. Good posture might help with your confidence, it sends a confident vibe.. \n\nTry acting confident for a day, you'll see you might actually like it.. and it's not as difficult to pick it up after a while as it sounds.\nSometimes you might feel a little cheesy but it will really help.\n\nAs for the concentration.. work on developing patience and listening skills. If you are genuinely interested in what a person has to say, it is easier to listen. Or you could try tapping one finger on your leg, I know someone who does this. (discreetly though) Don't make it look like you are impatient. \n\nI hope this helps
243845
believe in yourself and your own capacities! \nNothing else is true!
327838
There are a few simple things that you can do to boost your confidence quite easily.\nThe first is to make a list of all your strong points: write down all the things about you that are good and strong. If you need help, don't be shy to ask others to comment on your strong areas for you.\nKeep this list with you at all times, and pin a copy by your bed so that you can look at it first thing in the morning and when you go to bed, to make you feel great first and last thing every day of the week.\nThis is such a simple tip but it works really well.
783877
Consider starting a journal and include the following.  Write down 3 statements each day that are true about you, that are wholely positive, and that are about things that you are, or things that you can do.  Such as - I can read.  I am a helpful person.  I can change the oil in a car's engine. (These are true - about me.)  Try to write down 3 new things each day - but if you can't think of anything new, re-read your prior pages and write ones you have already written.  It works to help you understand yourself, and since it is true, tells you stuff about yourself that you knew - but don't think about.  It definitely helped my confidence.\n\nWhat also helped was finding out that some of my low confidence problem was physical (hypoglycemia) not mental.  If you get curious about this blood sugar imbalance there is some basic info at www.hufa.org.
440146
i used to be so shy, until i found my now best friend. she was so confident and encouraged me to do the same. maybe try and find friends on your own, so you aren't relying on your now friends to have a good time. Make conversation with a person in a bar or pub, thats usually a good way to get more confident, and if it doesnt work out then you can just leave it at that!\n\ndo things in public that you wouldn't normally do, like singing and dancing when messing about with friends.  Most of the problem is that you are thinking of what others think of you.  Dont worry what they think, theyr the ones having a boring time not you! and anyways, you wont see these people again, so let them think what they think!
35170
Discipline your thinking.  You can control what you think about, you just have to have the discipline, and character to do it.  \nWhenever you notice your mind wondering onto something else, make yourself focus on what it is your suppose to be thinking about.  It will be difficult at first, but will become easier the more you make yourself do it.  \nYou will find that you will become a more productive person when you can force yourself to focus on a task.
360616
I'd suggest easing into it.  \n\nStart with part-time work to build your confidence, then full-time when you're assured of your abilities.
957056
Sweetness, what you're missing is confidence in your own self. No one can give it to you; it's the sort of thing you have to gain by yourself. Keep telling yourself that you're fine, that people are just "looking" and not judging. Look in the mirror at yourself and tell yourself that you are fine, you are marvelous, wonderous, whatever just so long as you beleive it. I was self-concious in high school too and that's what I did. I figured I could let other people knock down my self-confidence or I that I wouldn't. I opted for wouldn't. Good luck and Blesings.
753524
Meditation and Deep relaxation for starters. Ask questions however dont expect answers.\n\nAllow the universe to give you the answers. Take note of things, people conversations, signs, sounds, unexpected gifts and meetings of chance. All these 'signs' are from your guides (spirits). Once you see the sign, thank them. Dont think you are going crazy. They will guide you into making decisions and confirm your deepest doubts on issues, allowing you to finally trust your intuition.\n\nGod Bless