ex-wife nightmare!! please advise?
436816
Stop jumping half-cocked.  Did you push your husband to have an arguement with her . . . because it sounds like something a woman would do . . . fight with an ex- when they had a semi-descent relationship especially with the kids.\n\nBy having you husband confronting her . . . (on your behest) . . . she turned it that you two don't love his kids, whom she has major custody of.  I know it is untrue . . . but that it what it does look like by doing that . . . both to his kids and to the neighborhood.\n\nYou gave yourselves the black eye . . . \n\nWhat to do . . . live and let live . . . do not get overly involved with her . . . but since his kids are closer . . . maybe it is time for him to take a more active role with his children lives . . . . use the opportunity to repair the damage you both just did.\n\nShe could have thought . . . If I move closer to the children's father . . . maybe he will be more willing to see them . . . apparently not . . . with your reactions.  \n\nSelfish.
945268
sit down with your girl friend and explain that your ex wife has realized that she still has feelings for you although you do not have feelings for her any longer... explain that you do not want to cause your exwife any more pain than she has all ready caused herself... tell her that you would respect her feelings in the same situation... ask her to be patient for a while longer\n\nyour girl friend is probably still very unsure of herself in this relationship even though you co habitate... do your best to re assure her of your affections\n\nif this problem persists you might also try sitting down with your ex wife and explaining that your girl friend is not happy with the situation and ask her if she will consent to one meeting... for a few minutes only\n\nyou are being pulled in two different directions by the women in your life... you seem to be handling the situation well...  trying to be considerate of both women's feelings... in this case one of your ladies will have to give... or you will have to take matters into your own hands and force one of them to back down... but be very careful if you choose to do that... you may cause hard feelings in someone
500699
Yeah...it sounds familiar ...I have an ex who tried the same...basically you have to set boundaries as it's not appropriate for him to visit you given his feelings and the fact that you're committed to another man. Tell him to use the phone or mail to communicate but don't expect him to go away -it's been 18 years since my ex has been doing this but as he's basically harmless I haven't really cared. The important thing is -is your ex harmless? Or is he someone who may act on his obsession? Finally I want to say -be sure you're not sending mixed signals...I've seen too many women not be clear about their wishes only to whine or press charges later when it's their fault for not being direct in the first place! Be honest with him and tell him to scram! There's my advice...I hope you take it! Edit~ I got your mail....If you hate him as you say AND HE HAS 'HURT YOU SO BAD' then why are you putting up with him then? Get a restraining order! Call the police and file a complaint and ask them to tell him to stay away! I thought maybe you still liked him on some level but since that's not the case you need to be pro active! Don't sit here on yahoo talking about it-do something about it -and I mean right now-today! Make sure you don't regret not doing anything!!!!!!!!! Everyday you let this go on-you encourage him more, and give him hope and he will become more relentless! You have been warned!
1112806
I think my ex-wife may have been one!
177622
The game playing has to STOP!! The two of you need to sit down together and talk without yelling just talk about everything and then try and decide what is the best for the both of you! It a serious matter you have a child involved and need to figure it out but please don't get back together just because you have a daughter because if you and your ex wife aren't happy its going to cause alot of problems and its going to be a real bad environment for everyone! My closet friend is going through this right now I have so many friends that are in the same situation, You have to remember that you as a person deserves to be happy! You and your ex need to work it out so you can see your daughter more no matter what happens because she is the most important person RIGHT NOW!!! You can always try counseling maybe you and your ex could go work together not against each other! GOOD LUCK i hope that i helped
713166
No way man. An ex is an ex for a reason. I'll give you a link to go to and read why you shouldn't even be talking to her. If you want any chance of getting her back go no contact. Start dating other woman and let her find out. She'll come crawling back and saying everything you want to hear. Don't buy it. She just wants what she can't have and when she gets it BOOM you mean shyt to her again. There's a 1 in 100000 chance that says she wants you back for the right reasons. Move on. The damage is done. She's damaged goods and you'll never have as healthy relationship as you think. She may say she wants to see you happy in the long run and personally you'll be happier without her. She won't allow you to move on until she's stable in her own life. Don't let her mess with you. And don't even be her friend. Until you are totally over her. Nothing you say or do is going to get her back. I PROMISE. Good luck and find you a new woman. AT CHURCH
1132736
HOW TO KILL THE EVIL COLD HEARTED ,LIFE SUCKING BIT** X WIFE OF MINE \n\n\nYES I DO HAVE ISSUES
1074147
Start out by reporting her for disturbing the peace. Do it every time she starts screaming at you. If they won't come out and do anything about it, this is what you do. Go to the Police Dept during regular business hours and file a complaint regarding lack of response on your problem. Tell them that you feel threatened by this woman. Keep a journal of every time you call and everything she does. Write down dates and times for everything. After you have several calls down and several incidents recorded, go to your city or county courthouse and ask the clerk of court about filing for a protection order. A protection order says that she can no longer attempt to communicate with you in any way. She can still yell at your husband or guests, but not you. Once you are at that level, go to your apartment managers again with copies of all this information. Still can't get rid of her? Take your info to an attorney for civil matters. You may have a nice case for a lawsuit. You may also want to have your husband file for a protection order as well. Hopefully you get a good repsonse from the police and she starts getting tickets for disturbing the peace. Do you know her name? You can check with the county courthouse and get her criminal record if she has one. Check with them and see what they will charge you for the information. In my area it's ten dollars for anybody's info. Build up and save your evidence and you should see her going bye bye, before long. If I can be of any further assistance, let me know.
529550
No you must have seriously pissed off your ex gf/partner and shes made a voodoo doll of you and is torturing you in your sleep ;)\n\nBe afraid, be very........AFRAID!!!! lol
471069
Wow dude, I had the exact same thing happen to me in college. My ex, psyco biotch girlfriend was one twisted chick. Thank God I ditched her monkey *ss. \n\nMy best advice to you is DOCUMENT EVERYTHING. Anything out of the ordinary? Document it. She leaves a creepy message on your machine? Save it and compile it somehow. See her parked otuside your house at 4:00 am? Sneak around with a flash and take her picture. Make sure you get the license plate. If you don't want her to see you, you can set your camera on a long exposure (like 2 hours) to get enough light. You can also use one of those surveillance video cameras that are triggered by motion. They're pretty cheap and easy to install. This will catch her in the act. This way, you can not only get a restraining order but press charges too. \n\nTo get a restraining order (I've had to do this too), go to the courthouse with some cause for it (like her threating to kill you on your voicemail or something like that). Tell the judge your story and say that she is harassing you, damaging private property and making you feel unsafe. The judge will give you a temporary restraining order which forces her to stay away. It will cost about $30 or so to have it served by a police officer. The cop will visit her, and deliver it to her. Now, if she comes within so many feet of you, her monkey *ss can get thrown in jail. This will only work for 15 days, at which point you will need to find a lawyer (believe me this is necessary). You will then go to court, tell the court your story, and the judge will take action. The judge's decision will most certainly depend on the DOCUMENTATION you have been saving up this whole time. Cool?\n\nAs best you can avoid getting into a physical altercation with her. If you really feel threatened. Buy some self defense type stuff like pepper spray. DO NOT DO ANYTHING ILLEGAL, like carrying a concealed weapon. If you get busted she can turn the story around on you. \n\nMake sure your girlfriend is documenting too. Document, dates, events, cost of repair...etc. Also, be sure to call the police each time one of these things happens. They will keep a record of it and when you go to court there's going to be a long list of things stacked against her.\n\nIf the court orders her to cease and desist, she will have to stay away from you and not call for good (or like 5 years or something). If she violates that, she goes to jail for a few years. \n\nWow, I feel for you dude. I've been there, done that. But I did my homework. The police in my neck of the woods have a mongo file on my ex. Good luck to ya. Shoot me an email if you need more advice.
1032090
I feel sorry for both you and your husband. Here is what I would do If I were in your situation:\n\nFirst of all you and your husband need to put up a united front. Once you set your rules and advise her of them, put your foot down.  If she chooses to disobey, then she must suffer the consequences, and if she calls the cops, have her bags packed ready and waiting by the door when they get there.\nAs for the ex, we all have to put up with them on behalf of the kids, but that does not mean that you hve to be a push over and let her destroy your marriage. Let her know where you stand.\nGood Luck.
421609
I'm with you in the same boat, maybe worse!  My ex's bimbo is set to the fact that their was NO life before her and HER kids - my ex and I had a son, who is now 8, and she won't allow him into THEIR house, and he allows her to treat him like that.  They do things with HER kids, and neglect our son.  She's a B**** in CAPS
107454
Look in the phone book under Legal Aid. That's where I would start. My sisters soon to be Ex pulled the same garbage but didn't get away with it.
598071
I have had some of those same dreams about my ex.  I really do not know what to tell you.  The shrink says that there are some unresolved issues that I have with him and that I need to work them out for myself.  The difference with me and you is that I have a child with my ex.  This puts a big dent in things on the disconnection side of things.  The biggest thing is that you have to realize that these are fears that you may have in your subconscious that you may have to deal with, to make your dreams stop.  It sounds like your husband is really jealous.  That is something that you two have to work out.  What I did is reassure my new husband that he is the only one for me and that will not change as long as he will have me.  That may work for you.  Sorry that I cannot be of much more assistance.  If you want more advice let me know, K.
1035929
Sign up my ex-wife....
651527
Speaking from my own experience [divorced last year] this truly is a difficult one. The problem with lies within his hurt. He finds it difficult to accept that you no longer want to be with him, therefore, if he can make an impact [albeit a negative one] on your life he feels he is still important to you. Basically just like a child seeking attention through negative behavior. Therefore the answer is to try and make him still feel valued by YOU [he knows his child will love him regardless of his actions]. Try asking him for advice [what is he good at] this action flatters the ego. As your in a new relationship, your ex's ego will be deflated, therefore making him feel valued is a good first step to accommodating a potential friendship. After all, even my own nightmare [ex] is the father of my children and regardless of my feelings he is important to them. \n\nGood Luck
1045141
I have been divorced for over 5 yrs now and my ex and mine have been doing this dance until 7 months ago. We keep sleeping to together because it was comfortable, I would call him if I was in trouble, etc.but that's just it. Its comfortable.Its sad but you got divorced for a reason and need to remember that.He is moving on with his life and so am I. I kept hoping we would get back then he would go away again. So I woke up to it. I wanted the fantasy of him not the real him. Please look at the big picture here. You are hanging on to a memory and for that it may even be a false one. You are in limbo and and he is living his life while you wait for him. Do you want to let him have it both ways? Keep you on the shelf and play with you when he wants to walk down memory lane? Do you deserve more than that?If you are meant to be you will be. But maybe you should look in the mirror into your soul and take care of you and grow from this, because that is what divorce is about. You may be very surprised by who you really are. Then what happens in the future who knows? Then again by then you may just have out grew him?\nGood luck