How do you deal with a monstrous mother-in-law?
443430
Duct tape or a really really cheap nursing home
877569
Unfortunately, I do think that's a very poisonous relationship to hold onto.  Can you imagine being married to her and having to deal with the in-laws and her brainwashing?  She's 38!  She should be able to stand up for herself.  \n \nJust my opinion.
902504
Hi been there and it is horrid dont argue with your hubby about her as she obviously wants to destroy the marriage and using a child is low Play her at her own game and stop trying to be super woman her hubby doesnt want to lose his son and she knows it why not go and have some you time when he sees his son for an hour she will panic my hubbys ex made my life hell for years but she didnt win and you are a winner as you have him and she dont smile sweetly with perfect makeup and be civilised it works
391287
I can tell you I have been there and done it and it only gets worse because she has a hold on him you can not break. But let me tell you this is also what she wants is for you to leave so she can have him all to herself. As far as your husband sooner or later the resentment builds up and the love is lost because of the way he does. Tell him in no certain terms you realize this is his mother but your also his wife and he is killing all the respect you have for him...Lady
785505
Your first mistake was giving a cell phone to a punk 12-year-old. \n\nUnless you are planning on divorcing your wife, the woman who is your mother-in-law is going to STAY your mother-in-law. That being said, you have a few options:\n\nOption 1: Do not retaliate against her. She knows what she did was wrong. Instead, focus all of your energy on getting right with your 12-year-old, including - and maybe most importantly - counseling, to help the child figure out what is behind all the self-destructive behavior. Sounds to me like this is one angry kid, and, given the dysfunctionality of your family, I can't say I blame the child. Sounds like there is a lot to be angry about.\n\nOption 2: Get a lawyer and file charges of false reporting (which lead to your arrest) against your mother-in-law. You may be awarded compensatory damages like loss of wages and defamation of character (which is pretty hard to prove). This result would put a few sheckles in your pocket, but will certainly do nothing to bring any peace to the family. By bringing charges against your mother-in-law, you will effectively drive a wedge between her and your wife, which may already exist and will certainly be made worse by this action. You have to decide if it is "worth it" in the long run. It is highly unlikely that your mother-in-law will be sentenced to any jail time, so, put that revenge pipe-dream to rest.\n\n3. File action(s) in Court to prevent your mother-in-law from having contact with your children. This will likely not be granted, as one of your kids is already in her custody. The best you can hope for is that the Court will agree that the woman is somehow a threat to the children and will mandate that her visitation with the children be supervised. \n\nCourts make decisions based on what THEY perceive to be "in the best interests of the children". Judges have seen it all and don't really care how mad you are about what happened. Your best bet, in the long run, would be to arrange for family counseling. This action on your part will go a long way to show a Judge that you, too, are taking the children's best interest to heart, and putting their welfare ahead of your own agenda.\n\nI understand why you are so mad. YOU need to understand that your anger - while justified - will likely not get you anywhere given the way Courts look at things these days. Keep a level head and you will be more likely to prevail. One last thing - my own personal experience in Family Court is - the one with the most expensive lawyer "wins". Sad & disgusting, but true.
960233
I try to keep my mother in law out of my relationship as much as possible,
188466
That is why they are called in laws..just ignore them back if they won't accept you. Try your best with them but if that isn't good enough for them than leave them alone...Lady
908144
Catch her putting in a camera on one of your own.  Then , send the tape to all your husband's relatives.  Once people know that others know, they usually drop their invasion of you and your life.  It's like the dirty little secret is out.\n\nNow, there is another problem here -- you are really upset and feel invaded by this.  Since your husband is so unresponsive, can you see a counselor?  You need to work out your feelings, since in the end she is still your mother-in-law and the grandmother to your child -- and will be forever, no matter if a divorce occurs, etc.  \n\nNaturally, your mother-in-law is sick and needs help.  I'm hoping other family members will realize the extent to which she is sick and will intervene.  I'm also hoping others will help your husband see reality.  As often happens, there are plenty of folks who put up with bad behavior, to the point of denying its existence, because the love and feel loyalty to that person.  It's called cooperating with the illness.  You need to walk a simple line ... without being critical and judgemental, state repeatedly that she is sick and needs help, that this is not the behavior of a rational adult, that there is free counseling through the church, etc.  What you are trying to do by this is get people to agree with you, so it's not a case of choose a side.  Instead, you are asking them to choose to help her.\n\nGood luck -- I feel for you and wish I had better advice for how to handle this.
201347
She is an important person in his life, so you can't ignore her existence. If you love him & want him to be happy, you will make an effort. Speak to her privately. Let her know how much you care for her son, and ask why she dislikes you. Explain to her that you are speaking to her about it because you want her son to be happy, & the two of you being at odds, makes things difficult for him.Try to resolve the problem.
637971
i think my mother in law is an alien
652225
I FEEL SO BAD! Where's the time for you? I didn't see anything for you at all. I didn't see any counseling for yourself. My fiancee has ADHD also and I know how that part of what you're going through. We're not married yet, but it's taken quite a bit to get his mom to finally accept our relationship but, your mothers treatment is UNACCEPTABLE! You ever watch the Nanny on tv? She says a childs behavior is UNACCEPTABLE quite a bit. She's not a child (which would be more Acceptable) she should be showing you more respect. You can only do what you can handle. You're first priority is to yourself and your immediate family. Meaning you, your children and your spouse. Your husband needs to stand up to the plate. (as my fiancee finally did) He needs to back you when it comes to his mother. His first priority is with you and your children. He also needs to be helping you with the children and around the house as much as possible. Even though he doesn't work, you two need to have a night out once-in-awhile by yourselves. Maybe, you can talk to your mother-in-law about a limit of times to help her and she in return watches the children for you night out. By this I mean EQUAL TIME. As far as the bills, reality isn't that your mother-in-law is going to pay the bills. First off, I don't see if you're living with your mother-in-law but, if you are that's going to be a majority of the problem. Which getting your own place would be greatly advised. There are places that can help with deposits and financial resources. In all, it makes me believe you are living with your mother-in-law and that's going to be a very hard and stressful situation. My advise is to move. Your husband may be ADHD (so is my fiancee) but, he still needs to know he is to be responsible. Write down what he needs to do and try to involve the children in all the chores. Watch "The Nanny." Or go online if you can't get that show in. She helps not only the children but, the relationship with the parents towards how to keep everything together. You're not a work horse and no one should treat you according. Good Luck!
244209
You need to sit your husband down and explain to him exactly how you feel.  Then you need to avoid your in-laws to salvage your mental health.  Allow your husband to visit them whenever he wants, but you stay home or go to a movie.  Seriously, my mother-in-law hated me and she broke up my marriage in the end.  It sounds like you need a vacation....
491495
You can't.\n\nMy mother in-law was a leach to our marriage for 2 years after she left my father in-law and then it got worse when my wife was pregnant and we had our first son. I hold my mother in-law 50% responsible for destroying my marriage with her interference.
1012894
Possibly she is trying to help and also wants to be a part of the family.  The best way to deal with it is respect.  Show her respect at all times and remember that the person you married was raised by this woman so she cannot be all bad.  You may also want to consider that it may be your attitude that is the problem.  Try to approach her not as your mother in law but as you would any other person you deal with.
432372
Patience is a virtue, I always say. If you live with them I feel for you. Just a few things to remember, 1)if you love him then you will learn to appreciate and deal with the family that you married into. 2)Although, everyone disagrees sometimes try to bond with your inlaws and things will go better than being upset. 3)Get to know your mother-in-law as mother than just a mom but a friend or gal-pal. 4)Do something as a family together. Go out and do something that you all will enjoy.
749833
If it really bothers you that much that you are family is bothering your in laws, then call them up. Find out what they want and tell them to stop contacting you through them. There are better ways of communications in future. If anything tell them to try your email that way you have control of their contact and they certainly wont bother your in laws.
966367
Talk to her and tell her that she is annoying, if she does not care than leave her alone!!!\n\nI have a sister-in-law that is annoying and we have tried telling her but she will not own up to anything!!!!!\n\nSome people are blind to their faults!!!