What approach should I take without getting too close with my coworkers if they treat me like an outcast?
453277
This is a complicating situation because when you first start a new job, you basically have to talk with people like that in order to get accepted. Over time, though, it gets old and like you said, you have to work. \n\nI would talk with them at lunch, stick my head in on them at breaks and after work. Just so they know that you are not acting snobby and still want to be their friends.\n\nBe sure and make a comment like " I have so much work to do because so and so has me doing all sorts of stuff." That way, you are 1. Gossiping 2. letting them know why you haven't been around lately 3. making pre-excuses for the next day when you really don't have time to stick your head in and say hello. 4. Taking the attention off of you an putting it on someone else.\n\nYou should discuss this with your boss and let her know that you want to give 100% to your job but if she needs you for anything, just to let you know. She will be amazed at how dedicated you are and make her open her eyes to the others that talk too much and get little done.\n\nGood Luck!
898985
Are you hotter than them? Maybe it's jealousy. Do you actually do a better job than them other than the few mistakes you made? Maybe they are intimidated. Its sounds like they are immature. I'm not sure why this job is so valuable to both of you but maybe you could consider transferring to another department? Maybe contact your human resources or equal opportunity section, if you have one, to see if they have any advice. If not then maybe mediation is the only option. Tell your boss and the other two that its not a healthy work environment and you think production in the office would improve drastically if something were to change...maybe more solo projects or moving cubicles to allow a little more privacy. It can be hard confronting superiors but what it sounds like is they are threatened that you might outshine them, my best advice is to keep doing your best, eventually you will get recognized and hopefully their bad attitudes will get recognized too (in a not so good sort of way)... GOOD LUCK!!
965677
NO, they are not very fun and yet I feel obligated to go.\nI don't like to see my coworkers drunk and I don't let them see me that way for sure.
1103161
Stop acting like God's gift and they'll start paying more attention to you.\n\nA wise old boss once told me, "When it's everybody else, it ain't everybody else."
915433
If you like each other go for it.  Get together outside of the office.  you can't be scared of what will happen if it doesn't work out.  If everyone was like that then no one would ever get together.  If there is an office policy that coworkers can not date then you need to be sneaky.  You never know, you might have found your soul mate.
314540
Was raised in a house like that.  Believe me, I understand. I used to go to my room just to shut them out.  As far as the workplace, it's hard because you actually want to get along.  If we don't participate, people will soon learn that we are not going to fan their fires and turn away from us.  If they are face-to-face, I just have a blank stare for a short time and that reflects to them their words, not my reactions.
785189
Don't let them get you down in the first place. \n\nIt's none of your business what people think of you.
1030480
The best way if you are strong enough is to smile and say I thought you were my friend but a friend would never treat someone this way,,, and walk away with your shoulders straight.\nThese people who tease you are not your friends.  We should all treat other people as we wish to be treated, so make sure that no matter what you treat them kind,, kindness always overcomes bitterness and ugly.
439462
First of all you can not make someone like you. And I am not sure why you would want to.\nGo about your work like you do not notice. I had a girl at work not that long ago that didnt like me. She was very open about it and it got to the point where she wouldnt talk to me. In our workplace we HAVE to communicate. But she wouldnt. I just kept on talking to her acting like I didnt realize she was trying to ignore me and not talking to me. I still got my job done and honestly it annoyed her which made me feel better hahahaha!\n\nAct like you do not know they are behaving like children. If people want to act like that on their own time that is their business. But I am at work to do my job and if they do not want to be my friend that is fine...I am not there to make friends. However in the work place I am going to be professional about it.\nAll you can do is be the bigger person and make sure your work is not effected by your concern over their behavior.
220126
Ignore them.  Instead, concentrate on yourself.  Emphasize your strengths and strive to improve where you have room for it.  Don't base your opinion of yourself on idiots flaunting themselves.
68563
The best way to make the work place a better one is to be nice to your coworkers.  You do not have to be their best friend, but you have to be there and get the job done.  You may find the a work day will go a lot quicker if you are a plesant and decent person.\n\nAre you doing something inapropriate that would make a fellow worker report it to a supervisor?  There should be no fear in anything you do at work if it is what you should be doing.  Do a good job and you may just get commended for doing that job well.  If you do well, the company does well, and if that is so, pay raises are also possible for a job well done.
331750
look, honey, it sounds to me like you need to start standing up for yourself. if someone started yelling at me when I was innocent, I would politely tell them to back off. my guess is, people use you because they know they can. they know you'll give them money and never make them pay it back. \nso start getting a backbone dear, or it will be this way your whole life. when you know someone is trying to use you, learn to say no. and don't worry about losing them as a friend. with friends like that you don't need enemies. \ndon't let people get away with walking all over you, and don't let people talk to you any kind of way. you can stand up for yourself without being a jerk, and that's what you should practice. if you don't like something, say so.\nand when people call you names, consider the source. so the skanky girl called you a name, so what? she's the one with the problem.\nwhen you stand up for yourself and respect yourself, people will start seeing you differently. again, don't bend over backwards just to make a friend; that's not what real friends are. take care of yourself first and foremost.\nand remember, if you don't control this now, it WILL go on forever. your bosses, your lovelife, your neighbors, everyone will find ways to abuse you. \nI know it's hard to find that kind of confidence. but you must, or you will not survive. tell yourself every day that you are smart and you are a good person. love yourself. I know that sounds cheesy, but it is the truth. start looking for little ways every day that you can assert yourself, and once you get started, it will get easier.
784147
When dealing with an envious co-worker, I kill them with kindness, and I'm not talking about lip service. You must be genuine when doing this for it to work. Obviously they have massive insecurities, and perceive you as some kind of threat. I would also suggest keeping ones personal, and professional life mum. In essence, do not give anyone a reason to hold you in contempt. The old saying is true, "keep your friends close, your enemies closer".
1149815
only you can make the changes that you desire in your life...everyone is special and so are you..Open up to others(your co-workers, etc.) and you will probably find some responding back to you with sincere compatibility and friendship...make one little step with one person and then another. good luck to you. Life is meant to be lived with others. Enjoy your life and enjoy the company of others. PEACE
1167885
Don't. What good would it do you? Does liking them or not liking them effect your job quality?\nNot everyone is always going to like everyone else and in a work place you are just never going to like everyone. But you still have a job that has to be done.\nIf they are trying to be your friend explain to them that you are not interested and that you are there to work not make friends. But other then that it really is not necessary.
1053805
Treat your underlings the way you would like to be treated. Never ask someone else to do a job that you are not willing to do yourself!
1172595
Don't carry yourself like a "young pretty girl" be a young pretty self confident woman, if someone makes an inappropriate comment in front of everyone I would give him a look that would send daggers through his heart to let him know I'm not playing games with him and if he gets you alone and make a comment I would tell him I don't appreciate him treating me like anything other than a fellow employee. do your job and do it well and they cannot fire you because you don't smile and act like a hoochie.but always remember there's no amount of money to buy your dignity. tell your boss in a respectable manner that you like your job and you want to learn and grow and work for him but if he and the other men there are making you feel uncomfortable with the comments. you have to decide if you are going to ignore the comments or deal with them. i work in a hospital as a LPN and  a male RN talked down to me because he felt I was beneath him so I invited my husband who is 6 feet tall 240 pounds of muscle to have lunch with me and i never had any more trouble