Can you tell me the funniest yo mamma joke?
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Here you go baby, can I have my points now??? \n\nYo momma so stupid, she studied for a drug test! \n\nYo momma so stupid, she thought, "Wu Tang" was an African orange drink! \n\nYo momma so stupid she hears it's chilly outside so she gets a bowl. \n\nYo momma so stupid she got locked in a grocery store and starved! \n\nYo momma so stupid that she tried to put M&M's in alphabetical order! \n\nYo momma so stupid she could trip over a cordless phone! \n\nYo momma so stupid she sold her car for gasoline money! \n\nYo momma so stupid she bought a solar-powered flashlight! \n\nYo momma so stupid she thinks a quarterback is a refund! \n\nYo momma so stupid she took a ruler to bed to see how long she slept. \n\nYo momma so stupid when she read on her job application to not write below the dotted line she put, "O.K." \n\nYo momma so stupid she stole free bread. \n\nYo momma so stupid she makes Beavis and Butt-Head look like Nobel Prize winners. \n\nYo momma so stupid she sits on the TV, and watches the couch! \n\nYo momma so stupid she bought a videocamera to record cable tv shows at home. \n\nYo momma so stupid she took an umbrella to see Purple Rain. \n\nYo momma so stupid it took her 2 hours to watch 60 minutes. \n\nYo momma so stupid when she saw the NC-17 (under 17 not admitted) sign, she went home and got 16 friends. \n\nYo momma so stupid she told everyone that she was, "Illegitiment" because she couldn't read. \n\nYo momma so stupid that she puts lipstick on her head just to make-up her mind. \n\nYo momma so stupid you have to dig for her IQ! \n\nYo momma so stupid she took a cup to see Juice. \n\nYo momma so stupid she asked you, "What is the number for 911?" \n\nYo momma so stupid she got stabbed in a shoot out. \n\nYo momma so stupid she took a spoon to the superbowl. \n\nYo momma so stupid she called Dan Quayle for a spell check. \n\nYo momma so stupid she stepped on a crack and broke her own back. \n\nYo momma so stupid she thought she needed a token to get on Soul Train. \n\nYo momma so stupid when asked on an application, "Sex?" she marked, "M, F and sometimes Wednesday too." \n\nYo momma so stupid she took the Pepsi challenge and chose Jif. \n\nYo momma so stupid when you stand next to her you hear the ocean! \n\nYo momma so stupid she thinks Fleetwood Mac is a new hamburger at McDonalds! \n\nYo momma so stupid that she thought Boyz II Men was a day care center. \n\nYo momma so stupid when she went to take the 44 bus, she took the 22 twice instead. \n\nYo momma so stupid she jumped out the window and went up. \n\nYo momma so stupid she thought a quarterback was an income tax refund. \n\nYo momma so stupid she took a umbrella to see Purple Rain. \n\nYo momma so stupid that under, "Education," on her job application, she put, "Hooked on Phonics." \n\nYo momma so stupid she put out the cigarette butt that was heating your house. \n\nYo momma so stupid she watches, "The Three Stooges" and takes notes. \n\nYo momma so stupid was born on Independence Day and can't remember her birthday. \n\nYo momma so stupid she thought gangrene was another golf course. \n\nYo momma so stupid that she went to a Clippers game to get a hair cut. \n\nYo momma so stupid, she couldn't read an audio book. \n\nYo momma so stupid it take her a month to get rid of the 7 day itch. \n\nYo momma so stupid she stands up on an empty bus. \n\nYo momma so stupid it take her a week to get rid of a 24 hourr virus. \n\nYo momma so stupid it take her a day to cook a 3 minute egg. \n\nYo momma so stupid she has to ask for help to use hamburger helper . \n\nYo momma so stupid she went to Disney World and saw a sign that said "Disney World - Left" so she went home. \n\nYo momma so stupid she asked me what kind of jeans I had on and I said, "Guess" so she said, "Levi's."
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go to funnyjunk.com, or jokes.com
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yo mama so fat she sat on a rainbow and skittles popped out\nyo mama so stupid she got hit by a parked car\nyo mama so short her feet swing when she sits on the curb\nyo mama hair so short when she gets braids it looks like stitches\n\ni could go on, but i'll stop now:-)
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Yo mama's so big, her belly button's got an echo.\nYo mama's so big, she can't wear an X jacket cause helicopters kept landing on her back.\nYo mama's so big, she rollerskates on busses.\nYo mama's so big, she thought Barnum & Bailey were clothing designers.\nYo mama's so big, she uses a jungle gym for a walker.\nYo mama's so big, she uses bowling balls for earrings.\nYo mama's so big, she uses the interstate for a Slip `n Slide.\nYo mama's so big, she whistles bass.\nYo mama's so big, that she climbed Mt. Fuji with one step.\nYo mama's so big, that they had to change "One size fit's all" to "One size fits most"\nYo mama's so big, they had to paint a stripe down her back to see if she was walking or rolling.\nYo mama's so big, when I fingered her I lost a watch and two rings!\nYo mama's so big, when she bent down to tie her shoes, her face got burnt from re-entry.\nYo mama's so big, when she goes in the water at the beach she changes the tide.\nYo mama's so big, when she stands up the sun goes out.\nYo mama's so big, when she went to the airport and said she wanted to fly they stamped Goodyear on her and sent her out to the runway.\nYo mama's so big, when you climb on top of her your ears pop.
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yo mamas so stupid, she tried to put the MnMs in alphabetical order.\nyo mamas so fat, when she tried to go on a cruise, the whole ship sank.\nyo mamas so stupid, she thought Taco Bell was the mexican phone  company\nyo mamas so stupid, the only thing seperating her and the UPS man was the door\nyo mamas so stupid, on a job application, under "Sex" she put "Yes, please"\nyo mamas so stupid, her shirt had to say "TGIF" or This Goes In Front, \nor with shoes "Toes Go In Front\nyo mamas so stupid, she tried to go in to an NC-17 movie, and they wouldnt let her, so she went home and brought back 16 friends\nyo mamas so stupid, she wanted to see how much a Big Mac weighed, so she ate it and stepped on the scale
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Yo momma is so fat that when she sat on a rainbow, skittles popped out.\n\nYo momma is so fat that when she was wearing a yellow, rain coat someone yelled taxi.\n\nYo momma is so fat, she stands in two different time zones.\n\nYo momma is so fat that she got stuck in the Grand Canyon.
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yo mama is so skinny, i went to give her a hug and i split in half\n\n\nyo mama's breathe is soooo nasty, her teeth packed up and left.\n\n\nyo mama is sooo fat, she went swimmin in the ocean and shamu was singing "We are fam-i-ly!"\n\n\nYo mama is soooo dumn, i told her to turn the tv on so she starts rubbing her boobies and lickin her lips!!
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Yo momma's so dumb when she saw under 17 not admitted sign she went home and got 16 friends \nYo momma's so poor each night she goes to KFC to lick other folks fingers \nYo momma's so old one of her pets was on on Noahs Ark \nYo momma's so ugly for Halloween she trick or treats on the phone \nYo momma's so dumb she passed by YMCA and said hey look they spelled MACYs wrong \nYo momma's so poor people rob her house for practice \nYo momma's so old her birth certificate is in Roman numerals \nYo momma's so poor she married young just to get the rice \nYo momma's so dumb she failed a survey\nYo momma's so dumb she fell up the stairs\nYo momma's so dumb she asked for a price check at the dollar store\nYo momma's so dumb she invented a silent car alarm  \nYo momma's so dumb and poor that when I came over for dinner she read me recipes\nYo momma's so dumb at bottom of application where it says Sign Here she put Sagitarius\nYo momma's so dumb she got a part time job painting skittles\nYo momma's so dumb she put on her glasses to watch 20/20 \nYo momma's so dumb her brain cells are on the endangered species list\nYo momma's so dumb her brain cells die ALONE\nYo momma's so dumb her breasts are square cuz she forgot to take the Kleenex out of the box\nYo momma's so dumb her cereal bowl came with a lifeguard\nYo momma's so dumb her latest invention was a glass hammer\nYo momma's so dumb her shoes say TGIF - toes go in front \nYo momma's so dumb I asked her do tricks for me and she wagged her tail\nYo momma's so dumb I don't even understand how stupid she is\nYo momma's so dumb I found her peaking over a glass wall to see what was on the other side\nYo momma's so dumb I put a ScratchNSniff sticker on the bottom of the pool and she drowned\nYo momma's so dumb I said give me a quarterback and she gave me Dan Marino\nYo momma's so dumb I said it was chilli outside and she ran in and got a bowl\nYo momma's so dumb I said lets go to the superbowl and she ran and got a spoon\nYo momma's so dumb I saw her in the frozen food section with a fishing rod\nYo momma's so dumb I saw her jumping up and down asked what she was doing and she said she drank a bottle of medicine and forgot to shake it\nYo momma's so dumb I saw her walking down the street yelling into an envelope asked what she was doing and she said sending a voice mail\nYo momma's so dumb I taught her how to do the running man and I havent seen her since\nYo momma's so dumb I think its a new world record\nYo momma's so dumb I told her Christmas was just around the corner and she went looking for it\nYo momma's so dumb I told her drinks were on the house so she went and got a ladder\nYo momma's so dumb I told her I was reading a book by Homer and she asked if I had anything written by Bart\nYo momma's so dumb if brains were dynamite she wouldnt have enough to blow her nose\nYo momma's so dumb if brains were gas she wouldnt have enough to power a fleamobile around the inside of a Froot Loop\nYo momma's so dumb if you gave her a penny for her intelligence you'd get change\nYo momma's so dumb if you gave her a penny for her thoughts you'd get change\nYo momma's so dumb instead of taking 4 bus she took the 2 bus twice\nYo momma's so dumb it take her a day to cook a 3 minute egg\nYo momma's so dumb it take her a month to get rid of the 7 day itch\nYo momma's so dumb it take her a week to get rid of a 24 hour virus\nYo momma's so dumb it takes 2 of her to listen to music\nYo momma's so dumb it takes 2 of her to watch tv\nYo momma's so dumb it takes 4 of her to screw in a light bulb\nYo momma's so dumb it takes her 2 hours to watch 60 Minutes\nYo momma's so dumb it takes her 4 hours to watch a 1 hour movie\nYo momma's so dumb it takes her an hour to cook minute rice\nYo momma's so d
687924
This site has some great Yo Mama jokes\n\nhttp://www.daylon.com/yomama/
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Please visit the following sites :\nhttp://www.ahajokes.com/yo_mama_jokes.html \nhttp://members.tripod.com/donaldchase/jokes/yomamma.html\nhttp://www.humorsphere.com/yo_mama/\nhttp://www.amazinghumor.com/jokes/yomamajokes/\nhttp://www.mommajoke.com/\nhttp://www.aardvarkarchie.com/jokes/yomamma/index.html\n...You'll find all you want !
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i would say nuthing because it's just like a joke.\n\nyo mama is so fat when she goes on the weigh it said to be continued.\n\n\nYo Mama So Ugly...\n\nshe put the Boogie man outta business.\n\nshe make Michael Jackson look like Brad Pitt\n\nwhen she wobbles down the street in September, folk say, "Damn it, can't believe it's Halloween already..."\n\nwhen she applied for the ugly contest they told her 'NO Professionals'\n\nshe looked out her window and was arrested for indecent exposure!\n\nminutes after she was born her Mother shouted 'What a treasure!" and her Poppa said, "Yes, now let's go and bury her..."\n\nthey push her face into the dough mixture when making Monster cookies.\n\nwhen they took her to the Beautician it took 10 hours....and that was just for the quote!\n\nyer Daddy takes her to work each day so he doesny have to kiss her goodbye...\n\nshe put Marilyn Manson out of business.\n\nshe was a guard at Snake Mountain\n\nthey knew what time she was born cuz her face stopped the clock...\n\neven Harry Knowles refused to date her.\n\nthey embalmed her face on a box of super-strength laxatives and sold it empty!\n\nshe gets 364 extra days just to dress up for Halloween.\n\nTony Blair moved Halloween to her birthday.\n\nyou papa throws the ugly stick and she goes fetches it every time.\n\nshe scared the stitching outta Frankenstein.\n\nwe had to tie a steak round her neck so the dogs would play with her.\n\nI heard yer Father first met her at the Zoo.\n\nher shadow gave up.\n\npeople at the Zoo pay cash so they DON't have to see her...\n\nher mom had to be Pissed drunk just to breast feed her.\n\nwhen born, the doctors had to fit her incubator with tinted windows.\n\nhotel managers use her picture to keep away the Rats.\n\ninstead of round the ankles, they put the Bungee Jumping cord round her neck.\n\nthey gave her a middle name...'accident'.\n\nshe fell out of the Ugly Tree, hitting every branch on the way down.\n\nwhen she walked into the Haunted House, she came back out with a Job Application!\n\neven Slicky Willy Clinton refused to sleep with her...\n\nwhen she was born the Doc smacked her face.\n\nYou mama so Ugly that she's got her very own Crazy Pranks & Hilarious Gags named after her...
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Cool joke:\n"Dad, what is politics?"\n"Politics? Well, consider our home. I am the wag earner, so let's call me Capitallism. Your mother is the administrator of the money, so we'll call her Goverment. We take care of you and your needs, so we'll call you the People. We'll call the maid the Working Class and your baby brother the Future. Do you understand so far?"\n"I'm not really sure, Dad. I'll have to think about it."\nLate that night, the boy's sleep was disturbed by the crying of his baby brother. He got up and found that the baby had soiled its nappy. He went to his parents' room and found his mother fast asleep, and then discovered that his father was bonking the maid so vigorously that they didn't hear his knocks on the door. He returned to his bed and went to sleep.\nNext morning he reported to his father, "Dad, I now think I understand what politics is."\n"Good, my boy. Explain it to me in your own words."\n"Well, while Capitalism is screwing the Working Class and the Government is sound asleep, the People are being completely ignored and the future is full of s**t."
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Thats a good one!!! A cute clean joke!!!! Keep em coming!!!
221179
Yo mama so stupid that she puts lipstick on her head just to make-up her mind.\n\nYo mama so stupid she hears it's chilly outside so she gets a bowl.\n\nYo mama so stupid that she tried to put M&M's in alphabetical order!\n\nYo mama so stupid she bought a solar-powered flashlight!\n\nYo mama so stupid she thinks a quarterback is a refund!\n\nYo mama so stupid when she read on her job application to not write below the dotted line she put "O.K."\n\nYo mama so stupid she thinks Fleetwood Mac is a new hamburger at McDonalds!\n\nYo mama so stupid when the computer said "press any key to continue" she couldn't find the any key. \n \nYo mama so stupid she got a doughnut and returned it cause it had a hole in it.
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Your Mamma said to tell you not to be asking for those stupid Yo Momma jokes.\n\nShe says it makes you look and sound stupid when you tell them.\n\nMakes you sound like ignorant White trash.\n\n\nHere is a regular joke for you.\n\n\nMarriage & Manners\n\nThis is a story about a couple who had been happily married for years.\n\nThe only friction in their marriage was the husband's habit of farting loudly every morning when he awoke.  \nThe noise would wake his wife and the smell would make her eyes water and make her gasp for air. \n\nEvery morning she would plead with him to stop ripping them off because it was making her sick. \n\nHe told her he could not stop it and that it was perfectly natural.\n\nShe told him to see a doctor; she was concerned that one day he would blow his guts out.\n\nThe years went by and he continued to rip them out!\n\nThen one Thanksgiving morning as she was preparing the turkey for dinner and he was upstairs sound asleep, she looked at the bowl \nwhere she had put the turkey innards and neck, gizzard, liver and all the spare parts and a malicious thought came to her. \n\nShe took the bowl and went upstairs where her husband was sound asleep and, gently pulling back the bed covers, she pulled back the elastic \nwaistband of his underpants and emptied the bowl of turkey guts into his shorts.\n\nSome time later she heard her husband waken with his usual trumpeting which was followed by a blood curdling scream and the sound of frantic footsteps as he ran into the bathroom.  \n\nThe wife could hardly control herself as she rolled on the floor laughing, tears in her eyes! \nAfter years of torture, she reckoned she had got him back pretty good. \n\nAbout twenty minutes later, her husband came downstairs in his bloodstained underpants with a look of horror on his face.  \n\nShe bit her lip as she asked him what the matter was.   \n\nHe said, "Honey, you were right.  All these years you have warned me and I didn't listen to you".   \n\n"What do you mean?" asked his wife.\n\n"Well, you always told me that one day I would end up farting my guts out, and today it finally happened.\nBut by the grace of God, some Vaseline and two fingers, I think I got most of them back in."
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Hey baby u r fine ill give u some jokes:\nYo mama so nasty she made speed stick slow down.\n\nYo mama so nasty she brings crabs to the beach.\n\nYo mama so nasty she made right guard turn left.\n\nYo mama so nasty the fishery be paying her to leave\n\nYo mama so nasty she has to creep up on bathwater.\n\nYo mama so nasty that pours salt water down her pants to keep her crabs fresh.\n\nYo mama so nasty I called her to say hello, and she ended up giving me an ear infection.\nYo mama so fat when her beeper goes off, people thought she was backing up\n\nYo mama so fat her nickname is "Lardo"\n\nYo mama so fat she eats Wheat Thicks.\n\nYo mama so fat were in her right now\n\nYo mama so fat people jog around her for exercise\n\nYo mama so fat she went to the movies and sat next to everyone\n\nYo mama so fat she has been declared a natural habitat for Condors\n\nYo mamma so fat you haveta roll over twice to get off her...\n\nYo mama so fat she was floating in the ocean and spain claimed her for then new world\n\nYo mama so fat she lay on the beach and people run around yelling Free Willy\n\nYo mama so fat when you get on top of her your ears pop!\n\nYo mama so fat when she has wants someone to shake her hand, she has to give directions!\n\nYo mama so fat she goes to a resturant, looks at the menu and says "okay!"\n\nYo mama so fat when she wears a yellow raincoat, people said "Taxi!"\n\nYo mama so fat she had to go to Sea World to get baptized\n\nYo mama so fat she got to iron her pants on the driveway\n\nYo mama so fat she put on her lipstick with a paint-roller\n\nYo mama so fat she got to pull down her pants to get into her pockets\n\nYo mama so fat when she tripped over on 4th Ave, she landed on 12th\n\nYo mama so fat when she bungee jumps, she brings down the bridge too\n\nYo mama so fat the highway patrol made her wear "Caution! Wide Turn"\n\nYo mama so fat when she sits around the house, she SITS AROUND THE HOUSE!\n\nYo mama so fat when she steps on a scale, it read "one at a time, please"\n\nYo mama so fat when she sits on my face I can't hear the stereo.\n\nYo mama so fat she fell in love and broke it.\n\nYo mama so fat when she gets on the scale it says to be continued.\n\nYo mama so fat when she gets on the scale it says we don't do livestock.\n\nYo mama so fat her neck looks like a pair of hot dogs!\n\nYo mama so fat she's got her own area code!\n\nYo mama so fat she looks like she's smuggling a Volkswagon!\n\nYo mama so fat God couldn't light Earth until she moved!\n\nYo mama so fat NASA has to orbit a satellite around her!\n\nYo mama so fat whenever she goes to the beach the tide comes in!\n\nYo mama so fat when she plays hopscotch, she goes New York, L.A., Chicago...\n\nYo mama so fat she's got Amtrak written on her leg.\n\nYo mama so fat even Bill Gates couldn't pay for her liposuction!\n\nYo mama so fat her legs is like spoiled milk - white & chunky!\n\nYo mama so fat I had to take a train and two buses just to get on the her good side!\n\nYo mama so fat she wakes up in sections!\n\nYo mama so fat when she goes to an amusement park, people try to ride HER!\n\nYo mama so fat she sat on a quarter and a booger shot out of george washington's nose.\n\nYo mama so fat she rolled over 4 quarters and it made a dollar!\n\nYo mama so fat when she lies on the beach no one else gets sun!\n\nYo mama so fat when she bunje jumps she goes straight to hell!\n\nYo mama so fat when she jumps up in the air she gets stuck!!!\n\nYo mama so fat she's got more Chins than a Hong Kong phone book!\n\nYo mama so fat that her senior pictures had to be arial views!\n\nYo mama so fat she's on both sides of the family!\n\nYo mama so fat everytime she walks in high heels, she strikes oil!\n\nYo mama so fat she fell and made the Grand Canyon!\n\nYo mama so fat she sat on the beach and Greenpeace threw her in!\n\nYo mama so fat even her clothes have stretch marks
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THAT IS THE FUNNIEST JOKE THAT I HAVE READ IN A WHILE...\nI JUST CANT STOP LAUGHING. (I AM 3) MAN OH MAN, MY MOMMY AND DADDY ARE GOING TO LOVE THIS.\n\nIT WAS A KIWI!!! HA HA HA LOLOL...\n\nYOU'RE KILLING ME!!! \n\nMAN, I JUST POOPED MYSELF! I CANT STOP LAUGHING!\n\nOH...HEHEHE.....HAHAHA...LOLOLO....\n\nWHEW...MAN THAT WAS FUNNY....\n\n\n......\n\n\n...........\n\nHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!