how do i cope my parents r going through a divorce?
444884
sorry to hear that kiddo.  my parents split up when i was like 10 and it was tough.  but now i'm 21 and i have good news--you'll get through it.\n\njust like everyone says, it isn't your fault.  divorce is so common these days that people forget that there are kids that are hurt every day because of it.  but the important thing for you to do is to keep your chin up, and don't hold your feelings inside.  talk to the people you feel comfortable with--your parents if they'll actually listen (not likely), a trusted teacher or school counselor, a family member like an aunt or uncle (grandparents are usually biased), or a good friend.\n\nas long as you let your emotions out, the loneliness and sadness you feel because of the divorce won't overwhelm you.  and last, make sure you make a resolution now:  that you'll marry a person that you know inside and out and that you know you can never fall out of love with.  even if it takes longer than you want it to, promise yourself that you'll never put your own family through what you're going through.  it'll give you strength to keep on.  good luck kid.
625264
Having there dad gone, prob hit them really hard. You Just need to remind them that their daddie loves them and you guys mean everything to them. Maybe what they need to for you tl sit down with them and say. Okay, were going to write daddy a letter. Make it into a fun project. Seems to me they really miss their dad and They are not used to him being gone for this long. Having kids at that age they dont really understand what is really going on and how to handle it so they take it out on you and act up. But being to strict wont make things better. With out yelling at them to tell them what to do. Say it in a cool and clam way of love. Kids respond more to a clam and sweet voice then a high mean voice. with your little one that learning out to not wet her pants that can be hard not having your dad around. but you can also make that fun. if you are really having trouble with things at home. try getting some help from family memebers to take them off your hand a little big. GO to sea world or the zoo. or something out doors for a change. I wish you the best of luck. No one knows how to deal with their kids. better then their own mom.\nHanig in there. Even if on somedays. if you just want to realx. get their fav. baby-sitter or something. Make cookies, put on a play. Just be their for your kids.\n\nGood luck hope everything works out.
711693
That is easy, because you are not ready!! You have been through a lot with the divorce, even though it is not final. You need to focus on yourself for a while and don't make it harder by adding another person to think about right now. Do things that you like and can do alone, go out with the guys, play cards, things with the kids. When the divorce is final and you have found out who you really are again, then you will feel more comfortable dating. You may also subconsciously think that it is not a good thing for the kids to see right now either, at least something to think about. Best of luck to you and time and prayer heal all things.
1170065
So sorry for your loss!  I can't imagine how difficult that is for you.\n\nOf course you break down!  In the course of life, 3 months is a very short time.  And ... it's okay for you children to see you cry.  Encourage them to express their grief as well.  \n\nI highly recommend grief counseling, for both you and the children.  Perhaps in a group setting as well as individual sessions.  It helps to know that other people experience the same emotions.  Check with your local church, temple, hospital, clinic or mental health clinic to see what is available for you.\n\nAs you are able, spend time doing a scrapbook, photo album, journal, about your feelings, about your life with your husband, about his life.  In time, the hole you feel will feel less deep and black, though you will always miss him and feel the lack of his being with you, but it wont be so devestating to you.\n\nYou are strong!  You can go on, and you can be a good single parent to your children.  Look into programs for them, and are their other male relatives who can help to fill in the gap for them?  Take parenting classes, get support and encouragement (there are groups online, as well as offline).  You can do it!\n\nThings are going to feel less overwhelming.  Hang in there!\nBest of luck to you.
1093587
I can tell you from experience it isn't easy.  However, I now have the advantage of being much older and am able to look back on the situation a bit more objectively.  First off, realize that this has nothing to do with you and their love for you.  This is a relationship problem between the two of them that you did not cause and you can do nothing about.  Next, continue to love your parents equally and do everything you can to make this as easy for them as possible.  Take time to talk to them and don't be afraid to let them know how you are feeling and ask them questions about what is going on if you need to.  Don't let this situation control your life, life will still go on and in a basic sense, nothing really is going to change all that much for you in the long run.
475648
find a couple small things that give you joy, and set aside time for yourself each day to do them - maybe as simple as walking quietly on some path by your house, or painting.\n\nFind ways to connect with other people in a social setting - take a community ed pottery class or something.\n\nFind a group of people who are worse off than you and volunteer some time to help them.\n\nJoin a support group for people going through a divorce.
298383
You might want to try therapy but if its to the point where you know in your heart its over then the best thing to do is figure out a way to be friends and it will make the divorce go smoothly.
659139
I know how you feel my mum and i went through the same thing except she didn't have a child by him.She got married i did try to warn her but to no avail there is nothing else you can do except be there for her.my mum divorced after a year and moved away.I'm happy for you with your grades at least there not going down the pan.I am shocked she is still with him after saying he would be happy if you was dead.Hope you can make her see sense good luck xx
66825
Unfortunately there's nothing you can do, I'm sorry to be the one to tell you that,but what you can do is remember none of it's your fault. Love both of your parents and keep a good relationship with both of them as long as you can and if they divorce be there for them, they are having a hard time too.Just because they can't get along with each other doesn't mean they don't still love you.
281092
Oh Sweetpea, You should find some help near you, some social help and start the divorcing process, till it's not too late. Your husband thinks that you do not understand much, do not see anything, can't do anything...I think you see and understand everything, you just need help and support from someone who has power to do so. Do not worry about justice in heaven, worry about the present time and your children. God will help you if you want to be helped.
337141
I say quit feeling sorry for your self,get off your butt and get a job.There are no guarantees in this life except Death and Taxes. Most men aren't better off financially after a divorce especially if they have to find,rent,buy a new place to live. they also have all the other expenses to pay for; gas,electric,garbage,phone,car payment now add on 25% of his pay to pay for his children from the same pay check as before. You just want to take advantage of the system and your ex-husband. Start a Day Care Center your self. If you work out of your home the state will have to check it out. To get State funds you have to provide a monthly menu and only have the amount of children allowed  based on square feet of your home you have.
36580
first you have to sit them down.explain what and why the divorse has taken place.then explain that it wasnt their faults.then cry a lot make it make them feel really bad for not trying to help you out a little bit.i know this seems a little decietful but it works everytime
533913
Got a 15 year old daugther going through this right now.  Been her dad and mom for 8 years now.  I don't know what to expect really in the future.  I know right now it's floating between hate and hurt.  I wished I knew how to help, but all I can do is be there for her and let her know dad loves her.
997571
what about going to your church and if they cant help maybe they can lead you in the right direction to get help. I understand the hard times as I have had my share but some how it always worked out.  Good Luck
1066783
Ouch.  Sorry to hear.  Age doesn't make your parent's divorce much easier.  Things will be difficult, but try to stay neutral and take it one day at a time.  Give yourself permission to be hurt, disappointed, mad, etc.
1035283
I know how you feel.  My husband used to be the same way.  It is a horrible way to live, isn't it?  Just remember that he has a problem and needs help.  Divorce was not an option for me so I stuck it out, hoping that he would change.  He did.   With a little maturing, antidepressants (for both of us I might add) and patience, we made it.\nI always wanted the kind of marriage my mom and dad have.   Loving, caring for one another, laughter and respect.  It took many years, but I finally got it.  We have been married 29 years this year.  It was soooo difficult though.  But well worth the wait.  Please try to talk to your husband about antidepressants.  It really helps my husband not be so angry and irritable all the time.  If you don't feel like you take it anymore (and I know how that is, too)  talk to someone.  It can help more than you realize.  If I can help in some way, please send me an e-mail.  I would be glad to listen.  I didn't have anyone that I felt comfortable enough with to tell all the sorted details to.  Didn't want mom and dad to know how bad things really were.  Good luck and I will say a little prayer for you and your family....:)
709090
You should sit your parents down and let them know that having to hear them fight so much hurts you.  By making them aware that they are hurting you it may help get them to stop fighting so much.  Hang in there.