When do you tell a guy that you have a history of severe mental illness and are $20,000 in debt?
436287
how about...Now!!\n\nHe should know what he is getting into.\n\nMy friend's fiance had severe mental illness...told her a 2 weeks before their wedding.....then killed himself.\n\nHe also...killed her heart and soul...for eternity.\n\nHe should know what he is getting into so he is allowed to make the choice.\n\nWouldn't you like to know something this severe about someone you were getting involved with?\n\nIt's only fair.\n\n$20,000.00 in debt?????  Jeez!!!
714842
tell him about HOW WORSE CAN BE A REAL BAD DAY!!!!!!!!!\nYou Know You're Having a Bad Day When... \n\n\nYour horn sticks on the freeway behind 32 Hell's Angels motorcyclists. \n\n\nYou've been at work 3 hours before you notice that your fly is open or your blouse unbuttoned. \n\n\nYour twin sister forgets your birthday. \n\n\nYour birthday cake collapses from the weight of the candles. \n\n\nYou call the suicide prevention hotline and they put you on hold. \n\n\nYou have to sit down to brush your teeth in the morning. \n\n\nEveryone avoids you the morning after the company office party. \n\n\nYour income tax refund check bounces. \n\n\nThe bird singing outside your window is a vulture. \n\n\nYou wake up and your braces are stuck together. \n\n\nYour blind date turns out to be your ex-wife/husband. \n\n\nYou put both contacts into the same eye. \n\n\nYour mother approves of the person you're dating. \n\n\nYour doctor tells you that you're allergic to chocolate. \n\n\nYou have to borrow from your Visa card to pay your Mastercard. \n\n\nNothing you own is actually paid for. \n\n\nEveryone loves your driver's licence picture, but you think it looks awful. \n\n\nThe health inspector condems your office coffee maker. \n\n\nYou invite the peeping Tom in... and he says no. \n\n\nThe Gypsy fortune teller offers to refund your money when she sees your future. \n\n\nPeople think that you're 40 and you're only 25. \n\n\nWhen the doctor tells you are in fine health for someone twice your age. \n\n\nYou call your spouse and tell them that you'd like to eat out tonight and when you get home, your find a sandwich on the front porch. \n\n\nYou start to put on the clothes that you wore home from the party last night...... and there aren't any. \n\n\nIt costs more to fill up your car than it did to buy it.\n\nsO HE should be thank ful that he was spared all this mess!!\nThis might make him smile!
779961
I am Bipolar II, and I have encounted only courage from others during my bad times.\n\nHispanics like any other race, are just people, and all people have their own veiws on mental illness.\n\nHave you talked to him about how it makes you feel when he jokes about the way you have felt?\n\nHas he been educated in anyway about mental illness?\n\nBe strong and don't take to heart his misguided and immiture response to your needs.
1129477
Unless he has been in trouble most likely not. If he has its 50/50.\nDid he work all the time. How much debt, Does he have children, does he own anything,  his character will count to some degree ect. It all adds up to points for his reconsideration form. And he needs to face it and take care of it asap. See a lawyer even a free one from Legal Aid.  Avoiding it could hurt him.
876471
It's not easy, usually us guys tend to think were bothering you, we usually won't call unless we have a reason for it. Just give him a reason to call, borrow something, need help, etc.
620164
honestly!\n\nwhy are you bothering?\n\nYou'll end up the person who will be supporting his habit 'cause he needs to borrow $20 (and he promises to pay you back, and he never does!)\n\nHe'll sweet talk you, he's probably got a way with words... but you'll be wasting your time! What do you expect to get out of this relationship?\n\n...And to top this off, be weary he'll eventually be stealing from you too! (This will definitely happen if he's out of work, can't hold a job down!)
901360
Tell him to call the mental health office - or the hotline and they will give him information regarding FREE counseling services.  The thing with medical assistance is they can only check the accounts that you give them- if he has the money in a separate account from his checking, he can probably get away without them knowing about it.  People of multiple accounts in many banks for that reason-- rich have them in off shore accounts.  Best of luck to your friend, you seem like a really good friend to be doing this for him  And there are family crisis centers that can give counseling to the whole family and by the way, he doesn't have a job so he should go to social services in his town and see what else they can do to help him get back on his feet--- again, he should not disclose that one bank account- and if it IS linked to his primary checking that he uses and they would ask for the records for, he should withdraw the monies from that bank and put it elsewhere and explain the withdrawal as a repayment of a loan to YOU.
3281
You'd better tell him soon because if you pass it to them without telling them first that you have it they can sue you.  I'd tell him on the phone really quick , tell him you'll let him think about it and hang up nicely and quickly. If he likes you then he'll deal with it with you. Don't beat yourself up about it. It's a common problem and people are hopefully more educated about them these days. Good luck.
836074
They are always open to negotiation as they do not want to lose out completely on a debt. They may prefer a small monthly amount each month to show you are serious. Go into the bank and have a chat.
458074
you need help call a shrink
761627
Ist he must realize that he has a problem. That he is sometimes up, up and up and other times down and bothered.\n\n2ndly He should set an appointment with his physician and talk about ups and downs. The physician can help him to understand his roller coaster ride and his lack of courage to do something with his life.\n\n3rdly if he can get a few hours of talking with a mental health professional he may come to see that his situation is shared by many people and there are therapies and medication that can have a positive affect.\n\n4thly you should support him as he comes to realize his situation.\nyou can encourage him to know that you are ready to help him in \nhis next steps.\n\nHe may need to know that he has more support than it appears. You may also understand that you cannot solve the problems he chooses to face.
860897
i would recommend not telling him about the state of your finances, think about it, you are losing sleep over this, how much pressure do you want to put on him at the age of 12, he will worry bout you, bout money and also feel guilty that he asked for an expensive pressie
664128
Tell them you are bankrupt and see what happens
460037
It's so easy to actually answer this question, but it's a different story when you are actually living it.  This is probably the same answer as living with someone with any type of addiction...drugs, alcohol, gambling, s@x, etc.  It's a sickness.  The first question would be, does this person recognize their problem?  Is some sort of intervention needed?  You obviously love this person, so walking out is probably your last resort.  If this person doesn't recognize their problem...then it's time to start thinking about walking out, this could be your intervention.  However, this person has to clean up for themselves.  Not for you, not for their parents, workers, etc.  They have recognize their problem and want to fix it. That's when your support is most crucial. I don't think it's a win-win situation when someone is stopping thier ways for someone else. They have to stop because they want to.  Part of that equation is seeing what they have done to others.  At the sametime, from this point on, you should be protecting yourselves.  That means your bank accounts and anything else that he has access to.  I'm not sure what state you live in, but certain states have laws that can help protect you.  You can put a block (freeze) on your credit files.  This will enable you to have some sort of control over your credit.  Also, contact the various credit agencies....Equifax, Experian, and TransUnion.  See what options you have to protect your credit from being used.  You don't want this person opening accounts in your name.  Of course, getting a free credit report from all of the above will show you who has accessed your file recently.  Additionally, I would give your state Consumer Protection Section a call, to see what else you can do.  You're in a tough situation.  You have to protect yourself and be there for support at the sametime.  I wish you the best of luck!
568103
If your planning on making it se serious with this guy. yeah you should tell him just for he knows you haven't been lieing about your past boyfriend if he hears them from someone else.
373763
Tell him you're worried about him and see what he says...I've come across some people who are schizophrenic, and they talk and talk and talk and make up a lot of what they say-usually schizophrenics just want people to listen to them, that's all.  Say stuff like, "I know your job sucks, man, you can do better," and things like that.  He can still change jobs; some older people stay at the same job for years and years because they're afraid nothing else is out there for them.  I know this eighty-year-old guy who works at a doughnut shop & he probably hates it, but he doesn't get all upset about it.
517434
Hello there!\nIt must have been hard to have found that out about your girlfriend after being together for 5 months. I must take medication regularly, and I had the same problem with letting people know I took it. You should feel honored that she shared that information with you. It is so hard to even tell anyone that you have a problem, let alone someone so close to you. She is basically taking an anti-depressant, which regulate the level of serotonin in her brain. A mental illness is a disease, like diabetes or hypertension. In order to control our mental illness, we take medication. Just as someone with diabetes must have insulin. When we don't take our meds, it can cause a recurrence of our symptoms--which often includes suicidal thoughts. If you really care about her, you could try and learn about her illness. Be there to support her. People are often inclined to selfish thoughts, thinking how bad they will feel and withdrawing from the very person that needs us. Everyone has some thing or another that we must "deal" with in a relationship. I have had many relationships when the person I was with could not handle the fact I had a problem. I dont' let it run my life and am very loving and responsible. I am sure people will tell you "horror stories" about their illnesses, and these do occur. You did become her boyfriend for a reason right? Focus on her positive qualities and support her. If you feel like you could not handle it, then the best thing to do is to leave the relationship. Good luck to you!