Is a boy who gets abused sexually by a man during his childhood or teenage more likely to be gay?
445787
I did a research paper recently and on a website for adult males who were sexually abused as children and some abnormal psych site they cited this group was more likely to become homophobic or unable to maintain long term successful intimate relationships due to substance abuse and self hatred issues
965791
Hello!! :o) Like some others who have already responded - I'm also curious as to how you know. But lets just assume that you 'accidentally' saw your son and his friend give each other 'hand jobs'. Contrary to what some guys say - a LOT of guys [especially young guys like your son] 'experiment' with each other. And more often than not - it goes no farther than 'mutual masturbation'. It's not a 'sign' of anything insofar as sexual orientation is concerned. [If it was - than MOST guys would be GAY - because MOST guys have had at least SOME same-sex 'experience'!!] But should you DO something about it?! Well... like what?! You certainly can't make it stop. You could - I suppose - threaten him or shame him. But that would just backfire and destroy whatever relationship you have with him. A parent always wants to keep the doors open [Emotionally speaking] and a sure way of closing those 'doors' is to make a child feel ashamed for being HUMAN. IF [and this is a BIG 'IF'] you have a good relationship with your son - and HAVE in past talked openly about things, including [perhaps] sex - you COULD bring up the topic in a 'round-about way. Without actually talking about him [and his friend] specifically [at least not at first] you could mention how normal it IS for kids to 'experiment' sexually with their friend. And let him know that THAT is OK. But also let him know that it's important to be careful about not getting carried away and doing things that maybe he [and his friend] shouldn't BE doing. THEN let him know that your 'door' is always open and he CAN talk to you about anything. AND that anything he tells you will be kept private. [And keep that promise!!] Saying anymore to him at this stage would probably just confuse him. I hope that helps. Craig!! :o)
740161
PEYTON seems a little gayer. THEY probably molested each other when they were kids.
860196
i assume this guy is gay too else i wouldnt waste yur time.\n\nif he is the same rules apply regarding attraction as in straight relationships. the main difference being that i would imagine is, at thirteen this guy may not want to be public in any kind of way.\n\nso firstly you need to establish if he would be prepared to consider a same sex relationship with anyone.  then if he is attracted to you in anyway.  this could be hard cos he may like you but have no desire to "come out" or whatev3r.\n\ni dont envy you
123683
I believe you are born with it.  My cousin is gay, and I swear by the time he was two years old you could tell he was going to be gay.  Before you say it was influence or whatever, let me tell you he was brought up in a perfectly average household, with a loving mom and dad, and a macho big brother.  We are born the way we are born.
563597
In the case of both my partner and I, I would have to say we were probably swayed that direction from abuse.  I can still consider myself bi, but she is strictly lesbian---she often says keep that smelly, pointed thing away from me.  And as offspring in a house where my mother has been a foster parent for many years, I have seen many kids come with sexual abuse.  Many females become either asexual/nonsexual while others become whores.  Males become \nhomosexual in MANY cases---or predators.  These I've seen way too often, recently, scarily eerie.  Sad but true.
42238
I would say it's a combination of genetic disposition (being born that way) and the environment one grows up in.  But as it is now, there has been minimal research done to prove whether one is born gay or not.  Of all the homosexuals I know personally, none have told me that they "chose" to be gay.
824436
The researchers are likely right. I too, was molested as a child, and it tormented my life for years. Bottom line Friend, when this kind of trauma happens to us, eventually, we all need counselling for it. Don't ever feel ashamed, because you did nothing wrong, and trust me, counselling will give you back your life. Perhaps, the abuse did make you attracted to same sex. I've been told (by my counsellor) that I was fortunate, and that a lot of times we will be either very promiscuous or attracted to same sex. Get yourself some help, because sooner or later, it gets us.God bless, and take care of you.
18542
Why should your reaction be any different if he/she was straight? If the person in question is suitable as a teacher and does the job required why should there be any problem. Prejudice, I know exists. But you should rest assured that there is no correlation between homosexuality and abuse, if that is your issue...
1129515
Probably not gay.  He had an interview in Playgirl back in the mid to late 70's.  He mentioned the way he likes to be approached by a woman wanting him for sex.  So I say he was straight.
797953
Perhaps I am missing something but it seems that the most important issue you should be concerned with is the advances of your brother. I do not think that him being gay is the issue, i think the fact that he is displaying incestuous behavior may be the big problem. If this is actually happening, you need to tell someone, if not your parents then someone in the legal field.
1027892
I can't give you an awnser base on research or some study all I can do is tell you my opinion base on my own experience as a gay man. People say that they are born gay because they can't remember a time in their childhood where they were straight in other words they can't give you an exactly date and time and say this is when I went from been straight to being gay. Can you remember a time in your life where you were not straight? From your earliest childhood memory of when you became aware of your sexuality were you ever not straight? When I became aware of my sexuality it just happen to have been of the homosexual orientation so I assume that I was born that way and that god made me that way for a reason. I hope this answer's your question if not feel free to ask me anything.
860908
I insist that it is not something you're born into - but results from a bad family dynamic.  A withdrawn, aloof father who shows no affection, love, concern & closeness & bonding with his son will do this to him, as will a dominant , bossy, loud-mouth & demanding & assertive mother who "wears the pants" while the father sits meekly & looks on and farts his time away.   when the boy doesn't bond with his dad & identify with him as a male role model - no doubt the boy will turn out to be a homo.\n\nFor lesbians, it happens with a nasty father, showing no love & respect for her - as well as a cold, detached, uncaring mother who doesn't bond with her daughter - but ostracizes the girl.\n\nProblem is that all this happens AT A VERY TENDER AGE - and that's why people always suspect they're "born" that way or that the genes did it to them.  \n\nNO One - in their full sanity & rational mind, fully competent mentally - would ever CHOOOOOOOSE to be homo.  It's not like on a certain morning a guy gets up from sleep & decides - "Well, I don't want girls, I want a guy to f-ck around with"  No -that's not what happens.  \n\nwhat happens is that viscerally, from within, the guy starts to feel physical & emotional attraction & need for a man's intimate presence - rather than for a female.   Parents bear the SOLE LIABILITY  for a lesbian daughter or a gay son.  \n\nthis has always been so - and is the undeniable truth !!!!!!!!!!!!
1120433
I just saw an article today in the paper that said men's sexual preference is decided before birth. I did not read the whole article...but if a baby comes out of the womb and sees good window treatments he is gay...just kidding. I dont think you should categorize that evil is done by most straight people and good by gays. I have seen a little of both from both sides... I don't think sexual preference has anything to do with the good that you do- that is an individual thing that comes from the heart not your groin. Just be happy with who you are and if you think you were born gay then so be it. Why is important to debate it? You will never change other opinions who are homophobic.
1142554
i believe u are born that way...if u look at some kids u will c certain gay tendencies from a young age....my sister had a friend who showed these tendencies...and when he got older he came out as gay...but then again people are just curious and will go for it just to see what it is like.....
1183514
It depends on socialization and conditioning in teenage years.\nBeing emotinally close to mom or other girlfriends.\nBeing attracted to any boy at early teen age.\nHaving sexual arousal by thinking, looking or touching of your boy friends and conditioning of this arousal for 4-5 years.\nAttracted to his own body, Narcisstic personality.\n\nBoobs of women and feminine nonmuscular body and lack of pe*** and dissimilar personality turns them off.
263629
I can't tell, but I'll assume you are a female. Many times a young woman that either has had a bad relationship with a father or significant male figure at an early age ( between 2 and 10 years old) will be attracted to men that are similar in characteristics. They attempt to change the person in an attempt to fill a void in their past. If you think this may sound like you, I'd suggest you get some counseling to deal with the real source of the problem, which is from your childhood.\n\nTry finding a church or christian counselor if you can. Some will charge  based on what you can afford. Take this seriously. It could mean becoming healed and whole, or a lifetime of heartache!