does anyone out there have to pay alimony and how do I get out of it?
80837
no you dont have to pay it you dont have to do any thing what can they do put you in jail ? mabie but that wont force you to pay.
1002380
I live in Kansas and my sister is a legal secretary. She says that for alimony or child support spouses income is their income and is not included in the worksheet. Man that SUCKS that your husband has to pay alimony. I hate alimony and would never ever dream of asking for it. Child support yes depending on the circumstances and how often daddy has the kids. But alimony, my god she's a grown freakin woman capable of getting a job right? GRRR that just eerks me.
728243
I was watching a top divorce lawyer on the wright stuff this morning!!!\n\nWell a woman called in and she asked,"would she be entitled to anything, she lived with her partner for "9 YEARS" and had a young child with him and the answer to that was "NO"\n\nYou will have to pay for the child of course.
641562
Go to court.  Or counter-offer if that is out of the question.  Like ask for a long term lease with a set rent increase each year.  If the house is his before the marriage, you don't have any claims on it so stay there as long as you need to.  If you don't want the store, get alimony.  Go over all of this with your lawyer to get your options quantified.
628658
i would think that would depend largely on if she is able to get out and get a job herself. if she is able to then she probably won't get half your pay for life. just up untill the end of the divorce.
890783
Discuss with an attorney to understand where you might stand & what kind of alimony you can expect. There is no need to stay with a guy who doesnt even bother hiding his relationship. Get out and enjoy your freedom
337141
I say quit feeling sorry for your self,get off your butt and get a job.There are no guarantees in this life except Death and Taxes. Most men aren't better off financially after a divorce especially if they have to find,rent,buy a new place to live. they also have all the other expenses to pay for; gas,electric,garbage,phone,car payment now add on 25% of his pay to pay for his children from the same pay check as before. You just want to take advantage of the system and your ex-husband. Start a Day Care Center your self. If you work out of your home the state will have to check it out. To get State funds you have to provide a monthly menu and only have the amount of children allowed  based on square feet of your home you have.
111379
If he is not willing to help pay, tell him to get out of YOUR house. Go see a lawyer and see what you can do to get the house in your name only. Obviously you are able to pay on your own because you have done it for 5 years.
271737
can't you explain all this to your divorce judge?  that you are on medical retirement for a reason?  because you're medically unable to work, now?  you could give up your retirement, but what if you don't get it back?  you don't want to give it up just to get more sick.  i understand child support, but alimony seems a bit of a stretch.  i would consider a part time job, perhaps, to supplement income.  surely this would be okay.
828735
<sigh> I really can understand where you are coming from.  I was in a marriage for 15 years before I moved out.  I made a painful decision to leave my boys with my ex-husband because he was in the Navy; steady income and secure residence, whereas I didn't know what would be my plight if I took them with me.  I worked two jobs, saved my money and finally managed to move into my own apartment nearby.  The boys thought it was fun to visit me on weekends "to get away from Dad."  Things actually worked out for awhile.\n\nThe thing is, you have to look at your situation and see what it is you are financially, mentally and emotionally capable of.  The arguing is not good, especially if the kids get involved.  This is what motivated me most to leave my ex.  He and I were arguing over the most ridiculous things and it was affecting the boys.  I talked with them and asked them how they felt about my leaving, getting secure with finances and bringing them with me once I'd gotten myself "steady" and they told me I should do what I needed to do to be happy.\n\nI had family but I didn't want anyone to know my marriage was ending, so I did everything on my own.  It took time and sacrificing.  I did have one friend who supported me in my decision and was someone I could talk to, which helped me get through the frustration of an ending marriage.\n\nWhile you go through this, if you could find a local service that could assist you, try to avoid confrontations with him, even if it means your not going "out."  These battles will affect your children and someone should take precautions to avoid that as it is just unnecessary.  \n\nIn hind sight, I wish I had waited until my boys had graduated high school because now, they bring it up and hold me accountable for the things that have gone wrong in their early adulthood life.  I'm not telling YOU to wait.  You have to research this within yourself and make the best decision for both YOU and the children.\n\nI wish you the best - this is a hard road to travel and no one person has the answer.  Be patient - you will find that answer within yourself soon enough.
569715
You don't have to pay child support if you have the children!  He'd probably get you for alimony though!  I know it's a tough situation.  I stay home with our children and I've thought about leaving my husband twice.  It's hard but sometimes you have to bite the bullet and make even more sacrifices to make life better for you and your children.  Your children probably would be upset, but they would eventually get over it.  As they get older, you would be able to better explain the situation.
384771
There is no room for being wishy washy here. This is not a dalliance. Bigamy and a child by another woman are too big for a marriage to overcome. You must do the following:\n\n1. Get an attorney. today.\n2. Secure your assets. Determine what major assets you have (bank accounts, investments, savings, retirement accounts, real estate holdings, etc.) and work with your attorney to keep him from draining the accounts and taking off with them. If you're not sure what accounts he has, you may be able to run a credit report on him to see what accounts he has outstanding. Again, use your attorney here.\n3. Immediately kick him out of the house and have him conduct all communication through your attorney.\n\nOn a personal note: this will be hard. In fact, it will be awful. However, many women have been cheated on and support groups do exist. Your attorney may have some referrals for you. Also try lookign up "divorce" in the yellow pages - I bet divorce support groups are listed there. Yours is a harsh case, but I'm sure you can find kindred spirts through these support groups. \n\nAbove all, be prepared to be stong when facing him. He'll be very sorry, no doubt. He may try to convince you to take him back. this is, of course, your choice. however, unless you want to live the rest of your life with his other ex wife and her child in your life (you can't ever get rid of a child) you should cut ties. It may be embarassing, it may hurt, but you can do this. \n\nGood luck and I'm very sorry.\n\nFollow up: As for $, talk to the lawyer. Your husband may be forced to map attorney's fees since he will be found at fault in the divorce.
890213
When you find out be sure to tell me!\n\nBut seriously the only "free" way to get out of debt would be to file bankruptcy and even that's not free.  You have to obtain a lawyer and depending on what kind of bankruptcy you're eligible to file you may still have to pay a small payment each moth depending on the amount of debt you've incurred.
59051
I was a stay at home mom.  I just went through a divorce and had no money when it first started.  They have Lawyers that will go by your income.  Even if you have no income they are out there.  They are called Probono lawyers.  I don't know if that is how you spell it.  Call any lawyer and tell them you have no money can they direct you to a probono lawyer.
253404
costs, alimony, child support . . . etc.
1128618
Imagine 32% of YOUR pay after taxes going to an ex (what I pay).  Imagine that she hasn't worked on a full time payroll in 12 yrs.  Imagine that your sending home $2000-2400/month and your told it isn't enough even though your not only sending that but also paying for half of summer camp and paying for all the dental work out of pocket.....  (we are not talking about alimony... just child support)\n\nI imagine that if you were giving ME 1 out of every 3 dollars you earn after taxes you might have a different view of the money and how it is spent.\n\nIf my ex weren't living on the support I pay for my children I might have a different view, but many women subsidize thier standard of living with the "kids" money.\n\nNow ask yourself why men are the way they are about support...
1099258
Yes - I agree.  Get a lawyer and appeal.  My husband worked for 30 yrs. or so and finally had to quit because of bipolar and his meds.  He applied twice, was turned down both times.  We finally found a reasonable attorney and just last month, my husband received his first check for 1,100.00.  Just don't give up - keep trying, okay?