how should a person act when he/she can't stand their friend's new mate?
93870
FIRST OF ALL, I PERSONALLY TRY NOT TO GET TO INVOLVED IN OTHER PEOPLES RELATIONSHIPS SIMPLY BECAUSE IT CAN CAUSE A NEGATIVE BACKLASH AND IT IS NOT WORTH LOSING YOUR FRIENDSHIP WITH THE PERSON. IF YOU REALLY FEEL THAT YOU MUST DO SOMETHING BEFORE THE PROBLEM ESCALATES, I WOULD THEN SIT DOWN WITH MY FRIEND AND HAVE A HEART TO HEART TALK. I WOULD ASK THEM IF THEY WERE ABSOLUTELY SURE THAT THEY WOULD WANT TO BE IN A MARRIAGE WITH SOMEONE WHO SHOW SIGNS OF ALCOHOL ABUSE. SECONDLY, IF HE IS RUDE, ABUSIVE AND ARGUMENTATIVE WITH STRANGERS, WHAT IS TO STOP HIM FROM BEING THE SAME WITH YOUR FRIEND, WHICH COULD TURN WORSE [VERBAL OR PHYSICAL ABUSE] IF THEY GET MARRIED. IT COULD ALSO BE AN ISSUE OF LOW SELF ESTEEM ON YOUR FRIENDS PART THAT SHE WOULD BE ATTRACTED TO SOMEONE LIKE THIS. AS FOR NOT GOING OUT WITH THE TWO OF THEM I WOULD SUGGEST THAT YOU GIVE IT ANOTHER TRY, IF ANYTHING JUST TO OBSERVE HIM TO SEE IF HIS DISPOSTION HAS CHANGED. ALCOHOL RELEASES A PERSONS INHABITIONS AND HE COULD HAVE BEEN HAVING A REALLY BAD DAY PRIOR, IT COULD ALSO MEAN BE THE SIGN OF AN UNDERLYING PROBLEM. IF IT COMES TO THE POINT THAT YOU FEEL THE NEED FOR INVOLVEMENT, REMEMBER TO BE UNDERSTANDING OF YOUR FRIENDS FEELINGS AND DEFINATELY TRY NOT TO BE NEGATIVE OR VERBALLY BASHING OF THE MAN WHEN DISCUSSING HIM. \nGOOD LUCK. REMEMBER THAT THERE IS NOTHING BETTER IN LIFE THEN TRUE FRIENDSHIP, RELATIONSHIPS WILL COME AND GO, BUT FRIENDS ARE FOREVER.
628313
Well what I would do is first of all, tell my friend the truth.  Tell her that I only said it because I was jealous of the time she was spending with the other person.  If you don't really dislike the other person, go to them personally and apologize and try to make amends.  Let them know you were jealous of the attention they were getting and maybe you guys can work it out.
923393
how could you have a bestfriend that doesn't like you?
28645
Straigh up tell them..."I don't like you."... My best friend did that to a guy who always sat with us at lunch time. She didn't like him at all. She said it loud too so all around us could here.. The guy left her alone after that.
522752
First, understand truly the view points of each one individually, and why they're angry with the other.  Then, get them together in a neutral place and YOU do the talking.. say.. this is how A feels, and this is how B feels.  And explain to them that you will not take sides, and that you will not talk to either of them until they've resolved their differences.  It's the best way to get them back to being friends, and it's also the best way to maintain your integrity.
286950
I'd sit them down and tell them what you thought. ( Make sure you tell them that you mean no offense for whatever it is that you're going to say first.) Tell them that you don't like what this guy is doing to her. Try and figure out exactly why it is that she's acting like that, it could be that she's trying to change for him or she may feel that she's better then everyone else now that she's with him.If it's the first then tell her that she doesn't need to or should act like that for anyone. If it's the other then you should make it clear to her that being with this guy doesn't make her any better, she still is who she is and being with someone, no matter who it is, doesn't make a difference. If you have to you could also try talking to her boyfriend see what he thinks.
257688
look u just sort it out by keeping them away frm each other and tell both of them that u cannot break the friend ship with any one and devote equal time to both of them and dont mix up or mess it up live ur life
740491
It's not fair to either of them for you to be with them both anyhow,. You are going to have to make a choice and pray that the one you don't choose will still care for you as a friend.
67885
Never fight in public; if you're angry at each other go separate ways until you cool off.  Don't tell your friends your problems unless you've tried to talk to your mate first.  Remember that if you discuss your problems with others, they will still remember long after you've let it go (and they will still hold a grudge against your mate; they love you and don't want to see you hurt.  Hold hands and let the world know you're in love.  Lastly, ALWAYS show respect for your mate, never let anyone put them down.
346277
Neither one is your friend.  Let them have each other.  They both deserve it.
173136
try to be strong , no matter what the situation might be, u shouldn't try to be with yr friend's ex, trust me it will definitely bring beef among u. forge ahead and u'll find someone else
793916
I never got that whole if I date him no one can. if you guys are over, and you agreed to see other people then get over it, your not a very good friend if you wont let her have a chance at happiness. I don't see anything wrong with it if she was a good friend, but if she just stared at you and asked you why you were mad, that obviously tells you she's kind of a jerk, she obviously doesn't care about you or your feelings, considering you just told her you were still in love with him, if I started dating my friends ex I would have at least shown that I was sorry for causing any pain, but some thins cant be helped, such as holding back feeling for a guy, dang,...  then I'm sorry but if I were you I would have brought her down. keep in mind though that if you guys are supposed to be together you will and if he wanted to see other people then maybe you deserve better, unless it was your Idea in with case, WHAT ARE YOU BITCHING ABOUT. its not fun but remind yourself of 2 things first of all that she deserves the chance at him, and second of all that you may still have a chance of getting back together with him. I got back together with mine.  Good Enough?
898858
Only if you don't like the person.\n\nCoach
678633
YOU BETTER NOT DARE GO OUT WITH YOUR FRIEND'S EX-GIRLFRIEND! DON'T BE STUPID. USE YOUR COMMON SENSE BOY. FRIENDS NEVER EVER DATE OTHER FRIENDS' EXES. SHE IS AN ASS FOR SURE AND ONLY WANTS TO HURT YOUR FRIEND, SERJIO BECAUSE SHE KNOWS IF YOU END UP WITH HER SHE WILL DESTROY YOUR FRIENDSHIP WITH SERJIO...THAT HEIFER. I KNOW I SHOULDN'T BUT I HATE PEOPLE WHO LIVE TO RUIN FRIENDSHIPS...GRRRRRRRRRRRRRR. DON'T YOU HURT HIM. HE IS YOUR FRIEND!\n(relaxes) ok...i've calmed down now. no more yelling. stay loyal to your friend please.
628291
Okay well first you don't want to look like your breaking in-between them so take a step back and think about things. Don't use things against him that he has done wrong because that looks bad on you. Just sit her down and kind of ease into the question what if. This will give her the idea that you do kinda like her. Then step back and see what happens.If you want to go further just tell her that you lke her, write her a note, tell her that you want to be frineds, but if her and him do not work out that you will be there for her, that you like her in that way, but dont want to interfear with her current relationship.
142540
Tell your friend that it looks like she wants to go a different way in her friendships and that you don't have much choice but to watch her go.  Let her know you're there for her if she needs a friend but not to bring any hate or meanness to the table when she does, to leave it with the hater she's wanting to hang with now.  It's tough to watch a pal go off in a direction you think is hurtful, KNOW is hurtful.  Part of growing is discovering what you're really about though and there's something in this new friendship that she's trying to find in herself.  There may also be an emerging masochistic nature to your friend that she's not shared with you before and this new friendship may be REALLY appealing in a way you can't relate to.  My guess is that if you give her space, she'll remember who she is and what she's about and reconnect with you.  If not then you need to understand that there are an awful lot of people out there who don't have the courage of their own convictions and are wildly uncomfortable with who they are.  You sound totally grounded but I get the sense that your friend isn't.
468175
nothing. be a good friend and respect what they have between each other. don't try to be with someone that is already with someone else. there are a lot of people out there, why fight over someone especially if your friend is dating him?