i am in love w/ my boyfriend but my best friend says that to keep our friendship i have to dump him what to do
81195
Your best friend must be jealous of your relationship with your boyfriend.  Tell how much she means to you and that no one could ever take her place in your heart.  Help her get a boyfriend and things may get a little better between ya'll.
624449
Because you are currently friends and you do have feelings for him, it is important to value that friendship.  I would mention the importance of your current relationship to him.  BF/GF stuff can get emotional and it is easy to mess things up.  So maybe you should start very slowly, to sort out your feelings and to work into this gradually.  I think the biggest issue is that you continue to respect eachother.  \nIf you keep communication open and honest, you should be able to sort out friend from boyfriend.  Make sure you have similar expectations.  Big things to look out for that break relationships and friendships: cheating, sex: moving too quickly or moving too slowly, independance and growth.  \n\nIt sounds like you are young, so talking about what he thinks it means to be bf/gf will be good too.  Telling him you are haven't done it before gives innocence and an easy way to resolve issues that will come up.  \n\nFake it till you make it....we all do.  Relationships mimmic what we see in life and in the media, so do the things that you admire in others relationships, with your own style..."playing house" in a sense,  until you can identify your own standards and grown identity in relationships....  \n\nsounds great! good luck!
25026
You should sit down with your boyfriend and make clear that you don't want to break up, if he really loves you he'll understand your position and will try to fight for that relationship.. But if he still wants out, beleive me girl, he doesn't love you the way you think.. Just think about it.. when someone is in love with another person, that someone will do anything to keep it together and will fight for his/her love...
591873
If the guy you are with now love and cherishes you stay with him love him let yourself be loved. For your friend stay clear he will only end up ruining what you and your guy have. Tell him you do not mind talking to him once in awhile but not all the time and that you are very much in love with your man.
426449
By what your saying, it's obvious that he doesn't care about you or your feelings. If he is your boyfriend then why is he kissing your best friend and even better why is your so called best friend kissing him. I think you need to drop both of them.
601201
I currently have this problem... and know exactly how you feel. My best friend is in love with me and has been for about 10-11 years now. I tell him I don't see him that way and that I love him but not in those ways. But that doesn't stop him from trying... and he is moving down to my area with all the hopes that we would be together...
14222
If youre really into your boyfriend and she's really your best friend...\n\n1. Let her know how much of a betrayal it would be.\n2. Seperate them, if you go out, go out in threes and dont leave them alone.\n3. Let him know whats going on and how important your friendship is with her.
1175176
Tell him you and him aren't on the same level as to what you both want out of life. While you love him as a friend, you want more and since he isn't willing to commit, it's best to end this now. Wish him luck and the very best then get on with your life.
222584
Ha ha ha, it's seems like I know u. Well I have the same situation, my BF always tells me that he loves me and I tell him "i like u and trust u, but i dont' love u yet". U know why i say so, i say it cuz I want to be sure in him, i love him but i don't want him to know that. Also I don't want to loose my best friend him. So that's my situation and I am sure that ur GF feels the same. JUst letting u to know she really loves u and know that she will be ur 4ever. but lemme give ya an advice: take care of her and be patient, don't loose her. Like I always say " love doesn't last 4ever, it becomes to be a trust" And in ur situation u already got the trust which is love as well!!!!
249823
I think you should try going on a date with him. If you don't try it you may always wonder whether or not you did the right think. If he is indeed your best friend, your friendship should be strong enough to handle whatever happens. If you already know everything about each other (like most best friends do) than the transition from friend to boyfriend may just be the natural course of action for you two. However, if you are not physically attracted to him at all, then maybe you should stay just friends because neither one of you will be happy in a long term relationship.
800954
Forget about it and move on.  Not everything that comes out of someones mouth is meant to come out.  You know, sometimes your mouth moves faster than your brain can censor.  He made a verbal slip-up.  If anyone brings it up again, say:  "OH, I'd forgotten all about that!  I'm sure he meant nothing by it." Then change the subject.\n\nYou don't want to be with him.\nHe doesn't really want to be with you. \nAnd your best friend wants to be with him.\n\nForgive, forget, and move on.  :-)
191896
I went through this myself, and the best advise I can give you is to let it roll off your back.  If your friend who is/was your  best friend believes someone over you than she was never your best friend to begin with.  The other girl who is lying, sure it would be nice to call her out, show who she really is, but then again, your friendship with BF will never be the same anyway, now the trust is broken.  As hard as it may be you should just try to get past this betrayal and find another healthy friendship with someone else. Sometime when we are in relationship rather they be romantic, or just friendships, we discover one side has stronger feeling than the other.  Never sell yourself short.  You seem intelligent, I doubt you will have any trouble finding a new buddy!! Good luck to you!!!!
1128024
put an end of this relationship if it hurts you this way...seriously...try to get your life back...simply tell him "I want to break up. I can not stand anymore of your "friend to talk with"...I do not like secrets, there should not be any secrets between us...try to learn something from this...bye  bye forever"...and really bye-bye...or else you would live like this forever...my friend lives like that...and I know how you feel...for your own good, let him forever, he will not change, trust me...I am a little hard on you, you do not know me, but I do want to help you and all women that live like this...YOU DESERVE a person that is devoted to you, that adores you, that tells you everything that happens to him, that lives for you (and you for him, of course)...you would like this, don't you?...I thought so...you just need some courage...
1036169
Well dear, the English language, although among the richest, is still poor to express certain issues. \nLove! Is Love a feeling or a property of a person? I think the second! Thus, if you are a person who love, then you love and you love everyone and everything! That is great! Congratulations!\nNow, since you love, you love your friends, also, regardless of their customs, attractions, wills, etc. What you are asking in if you should do what you do not like, am I right? \nIn the case you do not like something, you do not do this, because your closest and best friend is yourself! Yourself will never turn you down, or at least more than you will do to her!\nALso, we have many friends who either drink a lot, or smoke or take drags, ..., we get with them and try to influence them to soemthing we consider better! Others are doing thing we consider them fine, although those activities are not our style! Etc. We get together with them. We enjoy what we can communicate each other! Same way with your friend! You remain friends, but you should do what you really want! If you cchange, your friends will not like you any more, you will be done aanother person! If they like the new you and the new you is less good that the previous, run away, those might not be good friends, might not even be any kind of friends!\nNow, if she would bring another boyfriend, what would you think? How would you react?\nIt all depends on how you feel, what kind of girlfriend she is, what you want out of this relation, ...\nI might enjoy both of them and look around for another relation!!!!
65049
i agree with mortgage. its hard if you continue the relationship with that guy. if you really care for your bestfriend, just set him free. but if you care more for the guy, then "YOU GO GIRL"...lol...just kidding...seriously, go find another man.
721370
UNLESS you are the best friends ideal woman true love soul mate ETC you are quite screw, male frindships especialy best friends are way too close and sharing a woman is not unheard of , you might make then fight for a while but in then end they will be friends again , and you will end up loosing bouth of them plus you will become the bad one of the story \nSO if you you really really like they guy , brake up on friendly terms with your boyfriend and wait out a until your boyfriend finds someone else , then make your move , most likely the best friend will ask his Buddy if is ok with him (keep in mind that for him to do so he must really liked you  way past any phisical attraction , otherwise he wont bother do so ) \nNOW  if is phisical attraction just plain sex what you want , is easer to go for the 3 some , deal and make it think it was his idea, that might work , if all you want is to scrach an ich \nNOW commun sense would be no to do anything , most likely whatever you do you will be the one that ends up hurt and alone , and you dont need that , the choices above are just choices but it dosent mean they are the correct ones ,\nI understand how can someone end up liking someone close to their parther it happends all the time  but when you are considering acting on it , maybe and just maybe instead you should be wandering what is missing in your relationship , and see if you can work at it or move on , but dont get yourself into a mess
967448
i can understand your boyfriend's insecurity.  MOST guys are friends with girls and would get in their knickers if the opportunity presents itself (not saying that your best friend is like that, but a lot of guys are) \n\nand your boyfriend is probably thinking, '... yeah, y'all friends now, but romance/lust/love/whatever-you-wanna-call-it has a way of creeping up on people' .. you've heard the phrase 'we were friends, before we were lovers..'? \n\nwith all of that in mind and possibly more, youre boyfriend probably thinks the less time you spend with the guy, the less chance romance/lust/love/whatever gets to creep in.\n\nso, right now, while you're still just friends and have ABSOLUTELY NO sexual/romantic feelings for your best friend, you have to make a conscious effort to keep things that way, and then turn to your boyfriend and give him plenty of re-assurance.  i know it sucks, but unfortunately, that's the way us humans are wired. insecurity needs reassurance. and reassurance could be in the form of while being with your best friend, speaking to your boyfriend on the phone, for example, and tell him how much you love him (vomit) in such a way that the best friend hears it and the boyfriend knows that the best friend knows and heard it. that make sense? its a bore but if you really love your boyfriend and you really have no sexual feelings/hopes for your best friend, you might have to do all that :(