i need tips on how to cope with a divorce ?
84757
Sounds like this hit you hard. Sounds like you didnt know it was coming. They have support groups for divorce people. Try going out and doing something for yourself thats make you feel good, and dont blame yourself.
36580
first you have to sit them down.explain what and why the divorse has taken place.then explain that it wasnt their faults.then cry a lot make it make them feel really bad for not trying to help you out a little bit.i know this seems a little decietful but it works everytime
218581
Honey, I know how that hurts. It happened to me with my marriage. I ended up divorced. It does no good to try to pick up the pieces with someone who no longer loves you. You need to just let her go. I know how hard it is but you do get over it in time. Give yourself some time to heal and then think about dating again. It won't be easy but you'll get through it day by day. God will help you and so will we. You can always find a friend here on YA. If you need to talk, my email is on my profile. You're in my prayers, Sweetie. God speed.
1017931
I've been there. \n\nDon't abandon your children. If you really are the better parent, get custody and cut her out of your lives as much as you can. \nRetribution will never work. She is the mother of your children, any retribution against her is retribution against them. No matter how old a person is, thier mother is still part of them, and they are still a part of her.\n\nLosing the house sucks, but , Dude, it's a house. Just a place. the memories of it are in you. In your heart and mind. She can't touch that. \n\nBest advice I can give.... Don't expect to get over it. Divorce is like death only worse.  The person you gave your heart and life to is dead, and some other evil warped person has taken thier place. Like Night of the Living Dead or something. How can anyone ever get over that?  That pain will probably never go away. \n\nThe good bit is that eventually you will learn to cope with it.\n\nBelieve me, you are not alone in your pain. There are sooo many of us out there sufferring the same way you are. \nIt make me wonder sometimes how anything so simple sounding as "divorce" can wreck so many lives.
459055
The best way to help your ex get on with his life is by getting on with your life. Show him that there's life after divorce, and happiness. Be courteous, but not over-friendly. Discuss what needs discussion, like the kids, or whatever, then have places to go, and things to do...don't spend time in useless dialogue. Also, as far as property goes, settle that as soon as possible. If you and he have no possible reconciliation, no need to spend a lot of time together. Move on!
51798
I agree with Dragon on this one.  Yes you are heartbroken and yes it wil take some time.  They say divorce is like death.  The processes of grieving are very similar.  The only difference is that the one that you love is still alive and kicking.  Take this time to examin what you want out of life.  Appreciate this time alone and do things that you could not do when you were married.  Enjoy the lack of nagging and complaining.  And enjoy that you can act as you did before you got married.  Time heals all wounds and with this time, you have the ultimate chance to reexamine your goals and proiriities in life.  Take it one step at a time and you will be fine.  I know the pain that you are going through and I know that it hurts.  But trust me, your heart well eventually stop bledding and once that happens, chances are you will see that one true person that you are meant to spend your life with.
117213
Nuthin's wrong. You've just not got over your divorce, that's all. Just open yourself up (not literally :-) ) a bit and start interacting with everyone freely. You'll soon not only get over your divorce but also have a chance to find a lady good enough for you. BTW, you should also think of what you might have done wrong leading to your divorce so that you don't repeat the mistake once you find the right one.
598842
Go back to your therapist. Also look for a single-mom support group near you or online, (email me if u want!) Trust me girl I know from the bottom of my heart. My ex husband ASKED me for a divorce while i was in school. But I pulled through, we struggle every day but I thank God for my true friends that have held me up. If you are suicidal you definitely need to talk to someone. Biggest thing you can do is make it an absolute priority to take time for yourself. Put the baby to bed a half hour earlier and go take a bath, turn on a workout video, chick-flick, whatever, have a glass of wine, paint your toenails...anything you want as long as its just for YOU. Remember a happy mom makes a happy kid...NOT the other way around.
605624
I have been married for just over 9 years, together for 11 and have 4 children. We faced similar trials recently, we lost our house almost the car and were behind on a lot of bills. Divorce was never an issue, it will not solve any of those problems and if you agree on everything than you agree on that also. Sometimes you just have to lose everything to see what is really important... your family and their well being. You can always rent, get extent ions on the bills if you ask for help. It has been just about 2 years since everything seemed to go wrong for us, financially, but we are stronger and more aware of our money, emotions and the important stuff that always seemed to get lost before. It does get better. Keep your head up and stick it out.
640330
Try this:\n\nhttp://www.onlinedivorcepapers.com/divorce.html
87880
Unfortunately, hon, there is nothing you can do  except stand beside both and be there to pick up the pieces and help them move on.  Try not to take sides, but stay neutral because they will both still be in your life.  Divorce is hard on all involved all the way around.  Sorry I couldn.t be of any other assistance.  May God Bless - Take care.
146154
pack your stuff and leave while he is gone. leave a note or what ever you like. file for divorce and a TRO at teh same time
1048271
Firstly must say you seem like a very special man. Secondary I shall say that it is time that you concentrate on yourself a bit more (to be able to move forward)\n\nBe respectful, always reliable, helpful, be understanding, be her shoulder to cry on (life is funny.. but wheel turns). But at the same time give her space at this time as you don’t want to loose her.\n\nI had a friend who his wife left him for another man. They have two kids together. He was always there for her (but had other girlfriend but did not commit 100%: in fact I was one J ). If she was sick, or needed something, or pick their kids up: he was always there, kept nice contact with ex-in laws because of the kids.. She went back to him when she was in trouble. He let her. He let her leave him again for yet another man (even married) He was her friend, warned her about the guy who ended up to be an abuser. She left this guy in the end, she matured, and they now together (but he did not remarry), He is now 48, his wife 8 year younger. He married he as she was only 19.\n\n*******************************\nJust remember:\n*******************************\n\nForming a relationship with your ex is entirely separate from the process of ending a marriage; if you work through the process to achieve your "emotional divorce," you can cultivate something entirely new. Your old relationship is over; take the steps to heal so that you can invest your energy elsewhere.\n\nGood luck.\n\nps meant to say: and you get a new hobby and have fun with other people as soon you will feel better and might make new friends and will not feel lonely. The reason why we LOVe or MISS people is beuase we miss that comunication. Once you communicate with others it will be better for you. And who knows, maybe your ex -wife seeing how popular and outgoing you are might ant to herself be your friend asap.........  show her your new side that she did not see before :-)
398300
I have to say no.  My ex-husband and I tried that but it doesn't work because even if you don't say how you feel it doesn't mean you don't feel that way.  Then it seems like everything is bottled inside and eventually you blow up.  It's a nice idea but not very plausible.  Another thing in marriage is it's not always so hard to forgive it's the forgetting that's the problem.  So, my advice is find another way counseling, talking, or if that's not an option I hate to say but divorce is better than being your spouses "roommate", you can't just stop caring even if you think you can.
102213
1.  Do not believe in divorce.  Make it not an option, not even as a last resort.\n\n2.  You must put each other and each others feeling before all else.\n\n3.  You must BOTH be completely willing to communicate and completely willing to talk about problems that either of you feel you have.
1069149
You gotta take it, at this point, one hour at a time.  Shortly, you'll do it one day at a time.  \n\nAs bad as he was, you might think you'll still feel comfortable with him around so you miss the familiarity.  But fairly soon, you'll forget his smell, then the exact shape of his eyes and nose, and then one day you might wake up and you'll be ok.  \n\nYou are wrong...it's not that you can't go back to him...it's that he must not come back to you.\n\nso for now, let yourself feel bad.  It's ok.  It's all part of the process.  Bravo on ending it with him.  Good thing you didn't get married...divorce is expensive, and he'd likely make you pay for it...he might not care...and what about kids?  No...you're smart to let him go now before things get worse, and they would have, because he does not respect you anymore.\n\nSO go ahead...feel sad.  Give yourself the licence to mourn the loss of a relationship.  After being sad long enough, you'll feel mad...then you know you're well on your way to recovery.
1021277
Don't have the relationship UNTIL everything has gone thru the court systems. That way HUBBY/EX-to-be can't use anything against you. \n\nTHEN go slowly starting a NEW relationship. Take it slow and easy.