How do I know if the man I say I love is my security blanket, true love or obsession?
84154
Security blanket.. I believe you should be true to yourself whether he is ONLY your security blanket. There isn't any guilt if you love him and he can also be your security blanket coz I know its hard to be single mom. I was raised by one. Being your childrens' father makes him even better a candidate and all the easier for the kids and him to bond. I can't say that he's the right man for you but i think he fits the bill.. but just don't quit your job for nobody.. keep working and have a little savings... whether for your own good or for the children. Don't be fully dependant to anyone.\n\nLove is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails.
434663
ask him why he loves or what he loves about you... or say "I want a divorce", "I'm seeing someone else", or (my fav. since my "abduction") "I screwed a chicked", if he has a "sudden" and radical action... yeah he, more than likely, love you.
165791
Your "possessive" ways pushed him away, and you "constantly calling" him when he says he doesn't want you to actually comes close to STALKING,..and stalking is aganist the law.\n  \nYou say you will change for him, but changing for someone \ndoesn't work, and he seems smart enough to know that.   \n\nIf he should call you talk to him, but I doubt that he will, so I wouldn't sit by the phone waiting for a call that's not going to come.\n\nGet on with your life.  There are plenty of "fish in the sea". But first you need to seriously work on overcoming your "possessive" ways, which comes from being "insecure".  Learn to "LOVE YOURSELF", because you have to love "you" before you can love someone else.
113760
Truly loves you?  I wonder if that really exists with out you truly loving the other first.  If you wait for someone to truly love you it may never happen.  All you can do and all you can control is you.  You and your own feelings.  I would think that if you are asking about this then you are probably in love with someone and unsure of the others feelings.  Well of course you could ask...but really try this...open your heart and show it.  If the other person loves you then this will only create a space that will allow the other person to respond with love.  For you there also needs to be thought of what you need in life.  Things like helping you with issues you need handled or doing something for someone you love...but all of that is the easy stuff. I was involved with someone for three years and he did everthing for me...but he neer loved me nor I him.  Now I am ivolved with a man that I do not lean on for anything but his heart is mine.  Only after I opened mine and took a chance.
200334
Usually it's just something you know in your heart. As for outward stuff, usually he will seem completely and totally committed to you. He loves spending time with you, and seems like he can barely stand being apart from you. When you look into his eyes in a quiet moment between you two, often you can find the answer right there as well. Just watch him closely. When there is love between two people, usually it is only one of the two that can decide whether the other is in love with them or not. This is your bond. Do you think he is in love with you? Ask yourself that now and then when you are with him. You may just find that he is showing more of the signs than you originally realized.
38457
Yeah, I guess he's a possesive guy - be careful with that, he may not be the guy of your dreams...after all, a relationship is based on trust. Think again.
442848
Obsession is dangerous, Look at "Moby Dick".\n\nYou need to let him know that, although there are some wonderful feelings you still have for him (I assume that is the case), it just never worked out. It is time to let go and move on.\n\nIf it gets too weird, you may have to report his as a stalker.
555110
Just tell him how you feel and come clean about things. If you get butterflies in your stomache when your around him and if you can picture a life with him in the future then yes its true love!
318891
you say you love him and trust him, but you also say you don't know what to do.  if you trust him, then there isn't anything you need to do.  if something is bothering you, then discuss it with him, and if whatever is bothering you isn't resolved, then move on.\n\nif he love&#92; you, he shouldn't be doing things that make you wonder.  if you trust him, there wouldn't be any doubt.
664140
NO, YOU CANNOT ACHIEVE THE TWO AT THE SAME TIME. LOVE COMES BEFORE OBSESSION. LOVE COMES OUT OF PURE FEELING BUT OBSESSION COMES OUT OF GREED AND DESIRE TO CONTROL THE PARTNER TOTALLY. MAYBE LOVE SHOULD BE ABOUT LIBERTY AND FREEDOM TOO.
336038
I've been asking myself the same question for years, I thought I was in love but wasn't 100% sure.  People would say its the one you would do anything for or always want to be around them.  Well I did all those things and I loved the shawty but I wasn't in love with them.  When I actually fell in love with the right one I knew right away that I was in love and I didn't really need to confirm my feelings with anyone.  So if you are not sure than you are not in love with them, but just love them.  You heart will tell you if you are in love not your mind.\n\nGood luck luv
27139
Their are a lot of ways to know when you are but ther is no 100% formula to know if you are...\n\nIt's different for everyone, and at first you can confuse crushes with love, but eventually you'll have it worked out...\n\nIf you think you are in love then take sometime off with whoever you think you are in love with... Then after a while and you feel you still needs him then im guessing you either really like him a lot or you really are in love...
296402
If he really loves you then your heart would instinctively know---at present you are doubtful----very natural---only time will reveal the truth----impatience is natural but worth to find true love---- best of luck
589582
Allways listen to your heart and gut but just because you love the one does he love you too! If so he would make time for you no matter what! But Me I dont thingit is posable to love 2 men at the same time You can love many people at the same time  but Not LOVE them! So really follow your heart but if your gut is telling you hey something is not right check in to it find out what is wrong! But If you really Loved either of them you wouldn't be so confussed you would know! Who do you think of all the time when you wake up? when you go to bed? Which one is always on your mind if some one was at your door right now who would you want it to be! Who's eyes do you look into and see a future with him! There are a number of questions you need to ask your self! And go with your HEART!
429212
It's hard to know for sure unless you are determined to become the spy queen, secretly follow him around, dig through his stuff and hack into his email accounts.\n\nFor me, the warning bells in my head are enough.  It took me a long time to realize that.  I don't need to know whether he's definately doing a particular thing or not.  Knowing I'm not comfortable with the relationship will either cause me to have a heart to heart with him or to back out and move on.\n\nGood luck.
605551
You said yourself, he is YOUR boyfriend, he has, I understand, said that he is serious and that he loves you.\nWhy are you insecured?\nThere two points I want to mention here:\nTrust is the strongest feeling and if you are going to build a future together you must trust him and his feelings for you.\nAnd second, a woman just knows if her man loves her.\nCome on, believe in yourself more, you say you are a bit on the heavy side, well....this guy knew this and still he fell for you...didnt he? \nEnjoy this lovely time...your love...his love for you..dont go around seeing possible ghosts....\nHow would you feel if he asks you..do you really love me? are you really serious about us?\nBe happy mi girl...just be happy!
272113
u don't. if it is right and real u will know. if you have second thoughts then why not wait a while until u r sure he is for u. why waste time money and feelings over a legal document?