Is sending money better than going to a wedding even if a parent ?
89027
Whatever your personal problems are at the moment, I promise you that forcing the wedding party to answer questions about your absence will be way more stressful. \nYou say "hypocrisy" would take over, but I don't think it is at all hypocritical to set aside personal matters for the day and focus on the couple's happiness.\nGet over yourself and go to that wedding!
161195
As of 2/9/06..(subject to change)..I plan to just go to the courts this August to get married that way we can be sure to have a honeymoon wherever we like. \n1. We are 22 & 24 years old. I am a senior in college and he was a victim of Katrinia so we don't have a lot of money to spend.\n2. Also our families are 12 hours away from each other so which ever state we would choose to wed one of our families presence will be limited.\nSo we have decided to have a reception or party after we are married in each state for our family.\n\nHe actually was the one who wanted a big wedding but it didn't matter to me. I rather prepare for our future then to go in to debt because of one day. Some of my family and friends will be upset once they hear this news but unless they are paying for most of it this is how its gonna be. Besides, I have enough student loans!!
184881
I think, as many people here have pointed out, that it's wise to be very cautious when people contact you requesting money. There are a lot of scams going on out there and the Internet makes it easier for the person contacting you to hide his or her identity.\n\nOn the other hand, using payment sites is pretty safe so if I felt that the person contacting me was genuine, I would make a small donation. There are so many people in the streets asking for money, and giving the money to them is no "safer" than doing so online. \n\nFor example, if someone approaches you and asks for bus fare to visit his sick mother, you don't know that that's true just because you can see their face. \n\nSo, donating online doesn't really make that much of a difference to me, I guess it all comes down to how a person feels about giving money in general.\n\nHope this helps
112878
I think it would be cool too. If you're a teenager you might want to start planning kids birthday parties. It helps the parents a lot. The link below should help you. It's specifically about wedding planning but there are simialr things.
812235
It's more important what the gift is as opposed to how much you spend.  For example, homemade cookies or a book on a topic you know is of particular interest to the person would be more personal (as opposed to $ value).
626376
You can if you want to.  A lot of brides do.  I'm getting married in a few weeks and we decided not to exchange gifts just because we don't have the extra money, plus we decided to buy a dog after the wedding.
174598
Determine a) who cares the most about influencing wedding/honeymoon choices and overall cost, b) who can afford to contribute what, and c) how traditional all parties are. That will lead you to the right answer for you. \n\nBecause sometimes the groom's parents want an extravagant wedding for their own reasons, they wind up contributing more. If you want to call all of the shots, including who's invited and how big it is, think about paying for most or at least some of it yourself. If, for example, a couple isn't religious, but one or both sets of parents are, then the couple may not be able to choose a key part of the wedding because they're not paying for it. Conversely, if the groom's family is filthy rich and the bride's is not, then it would be ridiculous to ask the bride's family to pay more for the wedding. If you want an extravagant honeymoon, then you should probably plan to pay for at least some of it and maybe all of it.  This isn't the dark ages anymore. Unless, of course, you or your parents want it to be.
191027
start involving him more in the family get togethers.  On the other hand, I'm all for the family card and I'd be interested in hearing their side of the story.  Sometimes parents see what we can't because we are blinded by love:)
788808
my husband,,,,when your father 'gives you away' he should literally 'give you away',,you are then cared for and loved by that person,,many people dont get married but feel exactly the same.you should then discuss,or have the decency to discuss any important decision with the person it actually effects,,say,,if you were moving home,,whats the point of talking to your parents when they are going nowhere while the person who would be moving WITH YOU is sat at home unawares? it is akin to business,,,you wouldn't talk to a stranger about plans you may have and then go on and do them without consulting the person you are in partnership with,,it would be totally disrespectful and you would be a liability to work with.the same is true in relationships,,you are committed or you are not.
520102
This is the great thing about weddings, they are totally a personal choice as to what kind of theme you choose.  The most important thing is that you stick to your budget and not put yourself off track by a one day celebration, even if it's for your son.  I'm a single mom too and totally understand that you want the best for him.  You go right ahead and plan your pot luck, don't worry about what anyone else is thinking.  I'm sure it will be perfect.  Have fun and congrats to you and your son! :)
127869
Depends upon who can afford it, I guess.  But in general, I would say whoever is planning it.  If you and your siblings wanted to do something simple, and your parents want something more elegant, I think you should contribute to the party, but I don't think it is fair for you to get stuck with the entire bill.  Unless, of course, you can do it for a fairly comparable price.  That might be possible, too, if you have the dinner at someone's home.
97025
Don't give cash, it's crass, except from immediate family on this occassion. A small but fairly permanent object is a better choice, a leather organizer, cuff links,money clip, tie clasp, remember that this is the Jewish rite welcoming the boy into "manhood" so adult type gifts are suitable,  a silver picture frame for a photograph from the event,  even small electronics like a portable CD player or IPod, but not cash.
64135
The both of you should tell your parents about your plans and ask for their support.  Explain why you are getting married and why you believe you are ready for this step.  Hopefully they will understand and help you with your wedding.  Good luck.
159443
I have always believe that when two people get married the finances should be combined and both should have equal access.  I make twice the money of my wife but I trust that she is smart enough to have equal access to the money.  She still maintains a small seperate checking account that we put some money into each month so that she can buy stuff, especially presents for me without me knowing what and how much, plus it makes her feel more comfortable.  But the majority of our money is in a joint account that she has full access to and that I encourage her to use.  When you divide money up based upon who earns what I think the relationship is destined to fail.  How can you be truely committed to a relationship if your holding on to your money to protect yourself?  When you really love someone you don't try to protect your self from them or the posibility that your relationship will fail.  To do so is admiting that it will fail.  Your other points are equally valid, it is in the families best interest that you have equal access to all funds in case of an emergency.  Your name should also be on the titles of all cars and houses and on every credit card.  I also think it is important that you take time to look at the accounts on a regular basis.  There are so many horor stories out there of one spouses problems bankrupting a whole family and the other spouse had no idea that there was a problem.  And on a final note, just because you want to stay home with the kids that doesn't make you any less important.  By taking care of the kids you are saving your family huge amounts of money without you ever being paid for it.  If he has to keep his money seperate then tell him you want an account and that he has to pay into it each month the amount that you would normally have to pay for child care plus what your not recieving from a normal job.
33707
I had a small wedding.  It wasn't nearly as expensive as a big wedding (so more money for the honeymoon and other day-to-day living costs).  The small setting was very nice and left me calm without stressing over every little detail; I was actually able to enjoy the wedding.\n\nI had initally started to plan a big wedding but realized very quickly that everyone had their hand out for money.  I realized that it could become very easy to loose focus on WHY I was planning a wedding.\n\nThe small wedding was fun for everyone and didn't eat up the entire day for me, the groom or anyone in the family.
413616
In defense of the bride, I'm sure your financial problems were the LAST thing on her mind right now, no offense! She's planning a wedding and everything included. When it was mentioned that you wouldn't be able to go to the wedding due to money issues, I'm sure she just told her dad that it wasn't right for the family not to go. Dad might have volunteered to pay ya'lls way as his present to the marrying couple, did you think about that?\n\nI understand that your job is very important, but this is important to you wife, so if you are unwilling to compromise and go, then send your wife. It is her family, and she needs to be there.\n\nWhy should the bride alter her wedding dreams, if her family has the means to make it happen for her? I think you need to just suck it up and go! Not everyone gets a chance to fly for free to Hawaii and spend a week there, so my advice is to take advantage of it, it may never happen again!\n\nBe the bigger man here, for your wife, and go to the wedding!
61788
It's nice when the groom's parents make the offer to help with more than the following expenses, but these are the traditional ones:\n\n1. The Rehearsal Dinner\n2. The Bride's Bouquet, and the Mothers Corsages\n3. A Wedding Gift\n\n\nThat's pretty much it for traditional expenses! So, as you can see, it really would be nice to have the help.