I want to show her that I have my own life now that were divorced but I still love her so. How can I do it?
92790
By taking it one day at a time. and working on the things you can control. \n\nWork on dating new people, and learning what you like in women. She has left you and is not comming back so you might as well move on also. \n\nIt's your choice you can pine over a lost love or work on making new memories with someone new. the choices are up to you. \n\nI would suggest reading the book\nWho moved my cheese it's small and oh so wonderful for helping you look at your life with a critical eye. \n\nThen I would suggest readong smart love. \n\nMay God Bless your life.
528147
Of course you can move on.  And for your sake, I hope you do it real soon.  You were a whole person before you got married, and you still are a whole person now.  Depends on who has custody of the kids, as to how much you can change her bad mouth.  If you have custody, than head for the court, again.  If not, you are just going to have to "suck it up".  \n\nYou might check with a lawyer (yuk! hate to say that) or get legal advice, to see what your options are.\n\nMain thing is to be glad that she is living somewhere, and with someone else.  Let him enjoy her wonderful company, until she screws around with a new man.\n\nI have to say to you, be glad this jerk is gone.
709822
Tell her you want to have a "trial period" just go out do things etc. without being back together so that way she can see that you have changed and tell her that you are willing to make the changes to make her happy. Just let her know how you really feel about her and how it makes you feel to be without her.
137845
swallow your pride, whats done is done, think of all the extra income, also talk to her about the way you feel or felt and both set some quidlines as to household chores shopping etc. good luck to yoiu both, god bless.
384953
tell her that you are the same person with or with out money and tell her how you feel about her treating you differently
901429
You must have seen something good in her for you to have stayed with her as long as you did. Maybe you can acknowledge that she's a good person and that you value the positive part of your past relationship. Then be straightforward, but kind, and say what you said here. She might become emotional and dramatic, but you stay calm, affirm her where you can, but keep it short and then leave. \n\nGood luck!
174457
I just divorce, so she was not the good one. but when i "was in love" I propose with a good meal, wine at my place.  I ask her very kindly: You know we are together for a long moment now, so would you like to complete the circle and marrie me. (I know its crappy, but look now, I'm divorce...) after that we made love and she was realy happy.  it a bit old school but, whatever
1045141
I have been divorced for over 5 yrs now and my ex and mine have been doing this dance until 7 months ago. We keep sleeping to together because it was comfortable, I would call him if I was in trouble, etc.but that's just it. Its comfortable.Its sad but you got divorced for a reason and need to remember that.He is moving on with his life and so am I. I kept hoping we would get back then he would go away again. So I woke up to it. I wanted the fantasy of him not the real him. Please look at the big picture here. You are hanging on to a memory and for that it may even be a false one. You are in limbo and and he is living his life while you wait for him. Do you want to let him have it both ways? Keep you on the shelf and play with you when he wants to walk down memory lane? Do you deserve more than that?If you are meant to be you will be. But maybe you should look in the mirror into your soul and take care of you and grow from this, because that is what divorce is about. You may be very surprised by who you really are. Then what happens in the future who knows? Then again by then you may just have out grew him?\nGood luck
1815
It kind of depends on what you were not able to compromise on and if you are willing to give it a try her way.  As far as try to get her back start doing little things for her.  It sounds like you still talk and you must have some idea what kind of things she like.  Surprise her make her feel like she is the best part of your life.  Good luck...
859232
it takes awhile, sometimes a few years. (yeah, i know), but honestly would you rather that she stayed with you and lied about how she really felt? \ndon't both of you deserve to be TRULY loved by someone? it took a lot of courage to tell you she was unhappy and leave although right now i know you hate her guts! but it would have been easier to just pretend. and then you would be left loving a woman that didn't love you the way you should be loved.  \n\nit took me a long time to get over my divorce...i loved him, but i hated him at the same time. it suxs! but in time we came to realize that we were better off separated and we are friends now. we have a child together...so i am in constant contact with him. it's been 8yrs...and although some subjects are a bit touchy still....it's not so bad, and i don't hate him anymore. i might still be disappointed in some things...but the hate is gone.\nhang in there...
383090
WOW!!!! Mine did the same thing after 16 years of marriage. \nWell, later I found out he was seeing someone else and trust me I made like an 18 wheeler, pulled off slowly, got my speed and been trucking every since.\n\nIt is doable, just be determined to live your best life now!!!! Now's your chance to shine. Get a new attitude and celebrate yourself.
1048271
Firstly must say you seem like a very special man. Secondary I shall say that it is time that you concentrate on yourself a bit more (to be able to move forward)\n\nBe respectful, always reliable, helpful, be understanding, be her shoulder to cry on (life is funny.. but wheel turns). But at the same time give her space at this time as you don’t want to loose her.\n\nI had a friend who his wife left him for another man. They have two kids together. He was always there for her (but had other girlfriend but did not commit 100%: in fact I was one J ). If she was sick, or needed something, or pick their kids up: he was always there, kept nice contact with ex-in laws because of the kids.. She went back to him when she was in trouble. He let her. He let her leave him again for yet another man (even married) He was her friend, warned her about the guy who ended up to be an abuser. She left this guy in the end, she matured, and they now together (but he did not remarry), He is now 48, his wife 8 year younger. He married he as she was only 19.\n\n*******************************\nJust remember:\n*******************************\n\nForming a relationship with your ex is entirely separate from the process of ending a marriage; if you work through the process to achieve your "emotional divorce," you can cultivate something entirely new. Your old relationship is over; take the steps to heal so that you can invest your energy elsewhere.\n\nGood luck.\n\nps meant to say: and you get a new hobby and have fun with other people as soon you will feel better and might make new friends and will not feel lonely. The reason why we LOVe or MISS people is beuase we miss that comunication. Once you communicate with others it will be better for you. And who knows, maybe your ex -wife seeing how popular and outgoing you are might ant to herself be your friend asap.........  show her your new side that she did not see before :-)
370799
You have nothing to lose so go for it, if you dont act on it right now you will then say...if only i had told her...so just give it a try.  If it doesnt work you can just move on like you did when you first left her...
535012
Well, of course your going to feel this way. Having someone take advantage of your good nature would naturally scorn anyone's soul and heart. How long has it been since the divorce? Your just going to have to have time to heal. I would suggest though going out to put your mind at ease, but don't rush into another relationship quite fast.  Trust is something your going to just have to build with women again. Look back at your ex-wife were there signs that she was out for just money? If so use those signs to your advantage and beware of such signs in future relationships. DON'T EVER TELL SOMEONE YOUR DATING THAT SHE WAS A GOLD DIGGER. This may lead them to believe you could easily manipulated and taken advantaged of regardless of how long the marriage was. Simply say it was mutual and you rather not discuss it. Besides it's no body's business regardless of whom your dating or not. If there were no signs then be even more aware don't be to harsh w/ us women NOT all of us are out for money. I will pray for you strength to get back on your feet. You pray for a good Christian woman to come into your life and to be able to learn to trust again. Good Luck & God Bless. When you decide to become involved with someone again don't continue to be on the defensive either. You choose to date the woman so give her a chance, but just be aware of signs. Trust her, until you have proven it to be other wise or it's broke.  Don't allow your insecurity from a previous relationship or your ex-wife to ruin your chance for happiness.
535432
Just do it. If she's already telling you this stuff then her marrige isn't worth the paper she signed on the license.\n\nJust don't fall in love with a worthless weakling like her.  Do it, do it good and then say bye-bye.\n\nSplooch!
306912
are you sure that you are married? i mean having a relationship w/out communication is worst than being divorced. My dear, if the situation is too stressfull for you try going out with ur friends and try to plan a trip into the beauty saloon.....make yourself beautiful and let ur husband remember that he chose you to be his bride a long time ago
806251
Obviously there were some serious problems in your marriage.  Seeing as how she's now your ex-wife, you're asking this question a little late, and asking if of the wrong people.  You should've asked her.  If you have a good relationship with her, you might try to get it out of her one day, maybe she'll tell you what happened with her in your relationship.  If I were to bet on it, I'd bet you took her for granted, you stopped courting her.  She felt like you didn't care about her anymore, so she went out and found someone who does.  I'm not condoning her actions, because I firmly believe that marriage is a lifelong committment, and you fix the problems in the marriage, and divorce really isn't an option.  But obviously you weren't giving her what she needed in your relationship.  Sorry......You probably need to just move on with your life.